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Kids Thursday
2,360 Posts
#1 · September 29, 2005, 10:30 am
Quote from Forum Archives on September 29, 2005, 10:30 amPosted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
These have to be original and genuine - no adult is this creative!!
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby
sister.
After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one
for cold milk?"
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny
replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said,
"If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six."
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried
in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom
explained it was a childproof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please
don't give me
this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad:
"Why is he whispering in her mouth?"CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When
his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man named Lot was
warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked
back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the
flea?"
TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for awhile and
then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom willnever forget.... this particular Sunday sermon..."Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturouslook on his upturned face. "Without you, we are but dust." He would have continued but
at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!) Leaned over
to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what
is butt dust?"Have a Blessed DayDave and BarbaraNecessary Legal InformationWe do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from us it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than us, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
These have to be original and genuine - no adult is this creative!!
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby
sister.
After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one
for cold milk?"
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby
sister.
After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one
for cold milk?"
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny
replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said,
"If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six."
STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,
that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried
in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom
explained it was a childproof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please
don't give me
this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad:
"Why is he whispering in her mouth?"
BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried
in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom
explained it was a childproof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?
SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. "Please
don't give me
this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth cough."
D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I cost?"
MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad:
"Why is he whispering in her mouth?"
CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When
his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man named Lot was
warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked
back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the
flea?"
TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for awhile and
then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom willnever forget.... this particular Sunday sermon...
his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in?"
JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: "The man named Lot was
warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked
back and was turned to salt." Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the
flea?"
TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for awhile and
then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"
The Sermon I think this Mom willnever forget.... this particular Sunday sermon...
"Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous
look on his upturned face. "Without you, we are but dust." He would have continued but
at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!) Leaned over
to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what
is butt dust?"
at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!) Leaned over
to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what
is butt dust?"
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
Necessary Legal Information
We do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from us it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than us, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>
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