Quote from Forum Archives on February 6, 2006, 10:34 am

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Loosing Control"

 

 

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so
the catcher walked out to have a talk with him.

 

"I've figured out your problem," he told the
young southpaw.

 

"You always seem to lose control at the same
point in every  game."

 

"When is that?" asked the kid.

 

"Right after the National Anthem."

 

 

"Stop! Acts 2:38!"

 

 

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of Church services when she was startled by an intruder.

 

She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled,
"Stop! Acts 2:38! " (Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins may be forgiven.)

 

The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar,

 

"Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you."

 

"Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an Ax and Two 38's!"

 

"Fishing Trip"

 

 

"So, what's the matter?" asked Becky. "I thought
you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip
with the old professor?"

 

"Oh, everything went wrong," says Mrs. Professor.
"First he said I talked so loud I would scare the
fish. Then he said I was using the wrong bait
and then that I was reeling in too soon.

 

"All that might have been all right; but then, to
make matters worse," lamented Mrs. Professor,

 

"I ended up catching the most fish!"

 

Have a Blesed Day
Dave and Barbara

 

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