Quote from Forum Archives on August 31, 2005, 2:13 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

Special Note:

 

 

Please pray for the families and workers in the areas hit by the hurricane. The ones trying to locate families and friends need our prayers also. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Man of the House"

 

 

The husband had just finished reading the book, 'MAN OF THE HOUSE'.

 

He stormed into the kitchen and walked directly up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you are going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

 

His wife replied, "The  funeral director would be my guess."

 

"Funny Definitions"

 

 

Beauty Parlor:
A place where women curl up and dye
   
Cannibal:
Someone who is fed up with people
    
Dust:
Mud with the juice squeezed out
 
Egotist:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation

 

Gossip:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage

Handerkerchief:
Cold storage

 

Inflation:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper

Raisin:
Grape with a sunburn

Tomorrow:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today

Mosquito:
An insect that makes you like flies better
 
Yawn:
An honest opinion openly expressed

 

Secret:
Something you tell to one person at a time
 

 

"Worker Ants"

 

The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural history lesson. "Worker ants," she told them, "can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?"

 

One child was ready with the answer: "They don't have a union."

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

 

 

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