Quote from Forum Archives on February 3, 2006, 1:29 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"The Football Game"

 

 

St. Peter and Satan were having an argument one day about football. This goes on and on with both arguing about who would field the best team.
Satan proposed a game to be played on neutral grounds between a select team from the heavenly host and his own hand-picked boys.

 

"Very well," said the gatekeeper of Heaven.

 

"But you realize, I hope, that we've got all the good players and the best coaches."

 

"I know, and that's all right," Satan answered unperturbed, "we've got all the officials!"

"Football in Heaven"

 

 

Two friends Rob and Paul were two of the biggest football fans in England.

 

Their entire adult lives, Rob and Paul discussed football history, and they pored over all the statistics. They went to all of the matches. They even agreed that whoever died first would try to come back and tell the other if there was football in heaven.

 

One summer night, Rob passed away in his sleep after watching a Manchester United victory earlier in the evening. He died happy. A few nights later, his buddy Paul awoke to the sound of Rob's voice from beyond.

 

"Rob, is that you?" Paul asked.

 

"Of course it me," Rob replied.

 

"This is unbelievable!" Paul exclaimed. "So tell me, is there football in heaven?"

 

"Well, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which do you want to hear first?"

 

"Tell me the good news first."

"Well, the good news is that yes there's football in heaven, Paul."

 

"Oh, that is wonderful! So what could possibly be the bad news?"

 

"You're playing tomorrow night!"

 

"Super Bowl"

 

A man had 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sits down, a man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. "No," he says. "The seat is empty."

 

"This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting event in the world, and not use it?"

 

The first man says, 'Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Super Bowl we haven't been to together since we got married ."

 

"Oh ... I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you find someone else, like a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?"

 

The man shakes his head. "No. They're all at the funeral."

 

"Shouts Of Victory"

 

 

The restaurant where I took my two sons for a meal
was crowded with fans watching the super bowl on
television. The harried waitress took our order, but
more than half an hour passed with no sign of her return.

 

I was trying to keep my kids from becoming restless
when suddenly shouts of victory came from the bar. 
"Hey," commented my 11-year-old, "it sounds as if
someone just got his food."

 

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara

 

 

Necessary Legal Information
 
We do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from us it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than us, has forwarded it to you.
 
Normal Subscribe: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org
Normal Unsubscribe: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org
       
Web Subscribe: clean-hewmor-allow-subscribe@welovegod.org
Web Unsubscribe: clean-hewmor-allow-unsubscribe@welovegod.org
       
Email Group Owner: clean-hewmor-owner@welovegod.org

  Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute.  Please take  a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh!  --  To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org  To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>