Quote from Forum Archives on December 16, 2005, 3:31 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Visiting Santa"

 

 

As a little girl climbed onto Santa's lap,
Santa asked the usual, "And what would you
 like for Christmas?"

 

The child stared at him
open mouthed and horrified for a minute,
then gasped, "Didn't you get my E-mail?"

 

"Sorting Clothes"

 

 

Helping me sort clothes into "save" and "give away" piles,
my six- year-old daughter came across a garter belt.
"What's this?" she asked.

 

"It's a garter belt," I said.

 

Seeing that meant nothing to her, I added, "It's for holding
up stockings."

 

"Ah," she said, carefully placing it in the "save" pile, "We'll
use it next Christmas Eve."

 

"Fractured Carols"

 

 

 Listen very closely when kids sing Christmas carols,
This is what you just might hear!

 

 Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly

 

 We three kings of porridge and tar

 

 On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me

 

 Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire.

 

 He's makin' a list, chicken and rice.

 

 Noel. Noel, Barney's the king of Israel.

 

 With the jelly toast proclaim

 

 Olive, the other reindeer.

 

 Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say

 

 Sleep in heavenly peas

 

 In the meadow we can build a snowman,
       Then pretend that he is sparse and brown

 

 You'll go down in Listerine

 

 Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay

 

 O come, froggy faithful

 

 You'll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require"

 

 Good tidings we bring to you and your kid

 

Have a Blessed Weekend

Dave and Barbara

 

 

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