INGREDIENTS

INSTRUCTIONS

1) Lift top bun & patty off burgers.
2) Liberally add finely chopped red savina and habanero powder.
3) Replace tops of burgers.
4) Pray to <insert deity of choice> for salvation.
5) Eat serving (2x) of Big Mac's in under 20 seconds. (this is about how
long you have before the burn gets out of control...)
6) Paint small quantity of banana thickshake onto lips in a pitiful to
extinguish fire from that point.
7) Guzzle remaining thickshake in a vain effort to stop your cranium from
combusting and setting off sprinkler system.
8) Give up. Breathe on fire detectors, keeping mouth open and pointing at
nearest sprinkler.
9) Watch in fascination as clouds of water vapour evolve from your mouth
with no noticable effect on the fire contained within.
10) Feel something akin to Mt Vesuveus erupt from the back of your skull.
Determint that this can't be a good thing. Black out.
11) Wake up an unspecified time later and realise that you are dead.
12) Meet Satan, who asks you to leave as your breath is making his domain
too warm for his comfort.
13) Wake up again. Back in your office this time, but with a large bloated,
blistered slug in your mouth. Scream.
14) Realise, after biting it to death and spitting it out, that the large
blistered slug was in fact your tongue, now writhing round on the floor
with some bizarre life of its own.
15) Shrug shoulders. Your tongue is no longer in your mouth and will be one
less thing to worry about with tomorrows lunch.
Posted to CHILE-HEADS DIGEST by Jace <jace.carter@xtra.co.nz> on Apr 22,
1998

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