Unanimous Verdict

Unanimous Verdict

UNANIMOUS VERDICT

From the National Statesman, Vol. 58, Feb. 1990, no. 12, we read a testimony that is so unanimous, and so conclusive, that it can mean only one thing–God dumped the United States in 1933, and He is not about to pick it up again. Here is the verdict: The police say “alcohol and gasoline make for accidents.” The murderer says, “I don’t know what I did, I was drunk.” The Judge says, “Alcohol makes for crime, but doesn’t excuse it.” The psychologist says, “Alcohol robs a human of reason.” The doctor says, “Alcohol weakens resistance and shortens life.” The moralist says, “Alcohol and morals never kept company.” The mother says, “Alcohol robs the home of its peace.” The children say, “When father is sober, we run to meet him, when he is drunk, we run to hide from him.” The wife says, “Alcohol makes for divorce.” The undertaker says, “Alcohol speeds up my business.” The dry legislator says, “I would rather oppose my constituency than my conscience.” The pastor says, “Alcohol robbed many a soul of its eternal life.” The Bible says, “Drunkards shall not inherit the kingdom of God.” Common sense says, “If I do not take the first drink, I will never become a drunkard.” Abraham Lincoln, quoted by so many “political activists,” and “civil rights workers” who are drunks, said, “The legalized liquor traffic is the tragedy of civilization.”

Unanimous, unless you are a lush or a bimbo.