In addition to the outward general call to salvation, which is made to everyone who hears the Gospel, the Holy Spirit extends to the elect a special inward call that inevitably brings them to salvation. The external call (which is made to all without distinction) can be, and often is, rejected; whereas the internal call (which is made only to the elect) cannot be rejected; it always results in conversion. By means of this special call the Spirit irresistibly draws sinners to Christ. He is not limited in His work of applying salvation to man's will, nor is He dependent on man's cooperation for success. The Spirit graciously causes the elect sinner to cooperate, to believe, to repent, to come freely and willingly to Christ. God's grace, therefore, is invincible; it never fails to result in the salvation of those to whom it is extended.
H. Wayne House

Excusing your behavior because portions of the Bible are culturally specific

The Bible wasn't just compliant with the culture of its day – it exceeded the bounds of the culture of its day.  In other words, the Bible's message is not world-culturally specific – God asks us to be/do more than our culture expects, because God's people are not expected to fit the mold of any world culture.  In fact, we must not fit the world's standard, because God expects us to be His people – the salt and light of this world.

John MacArthur, in his book "Being a Dad who Leads" writes to husbands and fathers about God's expectations for His men:

Your wife is "a fellow heir of the grace of life."  She is your spiritual equal.  As such, you are to cultivate companionship and fellowship with her, not lord it over her.  This was a foreign concept to the Greco-Roman culture of Peter's day.  Husbands were generally uninterested in friendship with their wives, expecting them to merely take care of the house and bear children.  In contrast, the Christian husband is to cultivate a loving and intimate companionship with his wife, which is one of the richest blessings he can know in this life.

In these ways, 1 Peter 3:7 defines for us all the more what a sacrificial love looks like.  Ultimately, the Christian husband loves his wife not for what she can do for him, but because of what he desires to do for her.  That's how Christ's love works.  He loves us not because there's something in us that attracts Him to us; He loves us because He is determined to love us in spite of our unattractiveness.  He loves us with a sympathetic love that seeks to understand us, assist us, comfort and equip us, and meet our needs.  It's a love that perseveres even when we fail Him.  That's the kind of love you as a husband are to have for your wife.

God is preparing us to be with Him for eternity, if we will follow Him.  He's helping us to find Life that is beyond our imagination.  Most people in this world have messed up lives (focusing on personal profit and pleasure), but God is showing us what relational life in Heaven is like.  It's completely different – a culture of its own.