Quote from Forum Archives on October 31, 2008, 10:59 pm

Posted by: jhbreneman <jhbreneman@...>

HEART TO HEART NEWSLETTER
ENCOURAGEMENT TO WOMEN
Compiled especially for you with love by Lois Breneman 

 

~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~
11/1/08 Laundry Soap, Revising Recipes, Winter Tips, Humor, Children and God, Values  ~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~

 

If "Heart to Heart" fills a need in your life, bringing blessing and encouragement, please INVITE your women friends and family to subscribe and be blessed and encouraged as well.  Instructions appear at the very end of each newsletter. 

Prevent this newsletter from coming to you as SPAM.  Add [email protected] and [email protected] to your address book to help guide these newsletters into your Inbox.  Contact your e-mail service provider for instructions.

I suggest you PRINT this newsletter to read at your convenience, but save the original e-mail for checking websites.

Send ADDRESS CHANGES to Remain on the E-mailing List - Reply to newsletter with name & old and new address.

IN THIS ISSUE: 
DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME BEGINS ON NOVEMBER 2!
HOMEMADE LAUNDRY SOAP FOR PENNIES PER LOAD
BETTER FOOD CHOICES & REVISING RECIPES INTO HEALTHIER VERSIONS
APPLE CAKE
NINE STEPS TO FIREPROOF YOUR MARRIAGE
LOVE IN THE HOME 
I DON'T DO WINDOWS
PREVENTING COLDS AND FLU
20 WINTER PREPARATION TIPS - SAVING MONEY AND HAVING FUN TOO!
FROM A STRICTLY MATHEMATICAL VIEWPOINT
DISCIPLESHIP ASSIGNMENTS WITH DAD
TEN WAYS TO CORRECT BEHAVIOR WITHOUT CRUSHING CHARACTER
HUMOR IN THE FAMILY
CHILDREN AND GOD
DO WE TREASURE THE PRECIOUS WORD OF GOD THIS MUCH?
PRAY! THE STAKES COULDN'T BE HIGHER IN THIS CRUCIAL ELECTION

 

DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME BEGINS ON NOVEMBER 2!
"Spring forth.  Fall back."  We gain an extra hour this time!!

HOMEMADE LAUNDRY SOAP FOR PENNIES PER LOAD
By Lois Breneman, © 2008, Heart to Heart Newsletter, [email protected] 

 

Last week I made two batches of this recipe for more economical laundry soap.  If you enjoy putting a simple recipe together and saving money, you will enjoy this project.  Let the children help.  They will find it fascinating as well.  Two batches took less than 30 minutes to make and I had fun doing it. 

Commercial laundry detergents cost as much as 30 cents per load, even on sale or with a coupon, but you can get clothes just as clean for pennies per load, using this pure low suds recipe.  Why not put that savings toward other things?  It would be interesting to keep a record of the number of loads you do in a month or year and calculate your savings!  Hang a calendar in your laundry with a pencil on a string to keep track.  If you have children and do an average of ten loads each week, saving a quarter on each load, you would save $140 in one year.

 

Because this is a pure soap without fillers, dyes and strong perfumes, it is even safe for babies and anyone who is normally allergic to other laundry products.  If no one in your family is allergic, you may even add a small amount (1/4 - 1/2 ounce) of essential oil for fragrance.

 

You only need three ingredients which can all be found in most grocery stores (laundry aisle): 
        1/3 bar of Fels-Naptha soap (Or 1 whole bar of Ivory or any other bar of soap)   $1.29
        1/2 cup Arm and Hammer Washing Soda (This is not baking soda)                       2.89
        1/2 cup 20 Mule Team Borax                                                                                        3.99

 

That's a total of only $8.17 to get started.  You will be able to make three batches from the Fels-Naptha, ten from the washing soda and twenty batches from the Borax!  One batch costs 93 cents for 61 loads of laundry, if you use 1/2 cup per load.  That's just 1.52 cents per load!  Can you believe that?  Even if you double the amount, you would be paying about 3 cents per load!  For High Efficiency Washers, using 1/4 cup, the cost would be a rock bottom .076 cents - 3/4 of a cent!

Instructions to Make Laundry Soap:
1.  Score the Fels-Naptha soap to divide it into thirds.  Using a cutting board, shave the bar of soap with a chef's knife.  Fels Naptha soap is soft so it's easy to do, as you thinly slice the end of the bar.  Store leftover soap shavings in a Ziplock bag and label for future batches.

 

2.  In a Dutch oven (about 6 quart pot) heat 6 cups of water and shavings from 1/3 bar of Fels Naptha soap or an entire bar of Ivory or any other bar of soap over medium heat.  I was able to make 2 batches in a 6 quart Dutch oven, before adding additional water.

 

3.  Dissolve the soap completely; then stir in 1/2 cup Borax and 1/2 cup Arm and Hammer Washing Soda and stir over the heat until it's all dissolved.  Carefully pour hot solution into a  3 gallon or larger bucket.   For each batch I used a three gallon bucket that dishwashing compound came in at Sam's.

 

4.  Add 4 additional cups of hot water to the soap mixture bucket and stir well.

5.    If you would like a mild scent, add 1/4 to 1/2 ounce of essential oil.  Another option:  Add a few cups of commercial detergent to the mixture for fragrance and extra cleaning power.

6.  Add 1 gallon plus 6 cups of cold water to this solution.  Stir well and let set without stirring for 24 hours.  It will have the consistency of a liquid gel, with no dye.  Stir.

7.  Keep a tight fitting lid on the liquid laundry solution.  Measure 1/2 cup for each load of laundry (1/4 cup for High Efficiency washers).  You may want to save your old liquid laundry detergent containers for storing and easy pouring.  Add a few marbles to help mix the gel as you shake the bottle a little before using.

Notes: 
*   For myself, I prefer this recipe with a little fragrance.  Since I had a good bit of liquid laundry detergent on hand from sales, I poured a little into my homemade mixture for a nice scent.  
*   You may want to experiment to see if 1/2 cup is enough to make your clothes fresh and clean.  Even if you used a full cup, this recipe would still be much less expensive than most laundry detergents.  I prefer using a full cup for most loads.
*   Fels-Naptha bars of soap are also great for stain removal.  After removing a bar from its paper wrapper, I wrapped it with a terry cleaning cloth, and secured it with two rubber bands.  That makes it easier to hold while rubbing on a garment stain that has first been made wet.
*   I still use fabric softener sheets in the dryer. 
*  This laundry soap is safe for HE washers, because it is low sudsing.

 

Caution about Buckets:  Some people store their liquid laundry solution in five gallon buckets, but let me caution you to keep a tight-fitting lid on it and out of reach of toddlers.  If they get the lid off, they could fall in and drown!  Please never store uncovered buckets of water or other liquids where tragic accidents could happen.  Using much smaller buckets or old laundry containers would be safer. 

 

Powdered Homemade Laundry Detergent

1 cup grated Fels-Naptha soap
1/2 cup Arm and Hammer Super Washing Soda (not baking soda)
1/2 cup 20 Mule Team Borax

Mix and store in airtight container.  For light loads, use 2 tablespoons.
For heavy loads, use 3 tablespoons.

To Make a Larger Batch ~ Shave 6 bars of Fels-Naptha soap with a chef's knife.  Add 3 cups of Super Washing Soda and 3 cups of 20 Mule Team Borax.  Mix well and store in an airtight container. 

 

BETTER FOOD CHOICES & REVISING RECIPES INTO HEALTHIER VERSIONS
By Rachael Breneman and Lois Breneman - 2008

Most recipes you find can be revised and transformed into healthier versions by using these guidelines.  It's true that it does cost more to eat better, but you will save on medical bills as well as feeling much better.  Start with just one or two of these ideas, rather than being overwhelmed and not following through with any of them.  

 

By the way, sugar breaks down the immune system, making it much easier for illness to occur.  That would be a great place to begin.  Did you realize that Americans spend over one billion dollars on sugary candy each Halloween?   Something to think about! 

We may not be able to eat like this one hundred percent of the time, but taking intentional measures to improve our diet and that of our family's is certainly a good move in the right direction.

 

* Use brown rice instead of white rice or instant brown rice.
* Use whole grain flours rather than white flours in baking.  Best: Mill your own flour from grain.

* When buying bread, choose those with whole grains, rather than all or mostly white flour.  

* Use Stevia (powdered or liquid) in place of sugar, or artificial sweeteners.

* Use honey, sucanat or brown rice syrup instead of sugar when baking.  Cut down on amount.

* Drink herbal tea without caffeine rather than coffee or tea with caffeine.

* Use plain yogurt in place of sour cream.

* Use plain yogurt and add fruit and Stevia, rather than buying yogurt sweetened with sugar.

* Use frozen or fresh vegetables in place of canned.  It has been reported that frozen foods are an even better choice than fresh, since frozen foods are picked at their peak and immediately flash frozen.  Fresh foods often arrive at the grocery store much later than just after harvested, and have already lost many nutrients.  If you grow your own vegetables, that's even better.

* Use whole foods and make foods from scratch, rather than buying processed or boxed foods.

* Use cold pressed olive or canola oil instead of vegetable oil in salad dressings and baking.

* Use good oils in baking rather than shortening, and certainly avoid bacon grease and lard.

* Use butter instead of margarine.  Blending butter with olive oil is even better.

* Use natural peanut butter or other natural nut butters instead of regular peanut butter. 
* Use vegetarian refried beans in place of others which contain lard.

* Use natural, unprocessed meat instead of heavily processed meats like hot dogs, salami, bologna, bacon, lunch meat, corn beef, etc. which usually contain nitrites and excess sodium.  

* Use unsalted products and add sea salt to taste. Some studies report that when people use unrefined sea salt there is no increase in blood pressure. 

* Use breads, pastas and cereals made with whole grains.
* Fresh fruit is best, but if you must use canned on occasion, make sure it is packed in it's own juice rather than in syrup. 

* Read labels carefully.  As much as possible try to avoid products containing: Aspartame, 

sugar, high fructose corn syrup, MSG (monosodium glutamate), hydrogenated oil and partially hydrogenated oils, dyes and colorings, and nitrites.

 

 

APPLE CAKE

Combine and beat well:            Add and mix into wet ingredients:

2 cups sucanat                          1 1/4 tsp. baking soda

1 1/2 cup oil                               1 tsp. salt

2 tsp. vanilla                               3 cups flour

2 eggs, beaten                          

juice of half a lemon       

 

Stir in (Mixture will be thick):                

2 cups peeled, chopped tart apples

1 cup chopped raisins

1 1/2 - 2 cups chopped walnuts, almonds or pecans             No need for frosting!

 

Spoon into a greased and floured tube pan and bake at 325 degrees for 1 1/2 hours.  Test for doneness with a toothpick; let set a few minutes and turn out onto a plate.  Absolutely delicious!

 

 

NINE STEPS TO FIREPROOF YOUR MARRIAGE
By Dennis Rainey - www.familylife.com - Used by permission
Here are the 3rd and 4th steps in Dennis Rainey's article that I promised to continue.

Step Four: Begin to pray with your spouse

While I was still a newlywed, I asked my mentor, Carl Wilson, for his best words of advice about marriage. Carl, who had been married for many years and had four children, said, "That's easy. Pray daily together."

 

Because I really wanted to succeed as a husband, I immediately applied Carl's wisdom. I went home that night and instituted a spiritual discipline that we have maintained consistently since our marriage began in 1972. This daily habit has helped us resolve conflicts and keep the communication lines open. Most importantly, it has demonstrated our dependence on Jesus Christ as the Lord of our family. When you invite God into your marriage on a daily basis, He will change things.

 

God intends for marriage to be a spiritual relationship consisting of three—not just a man and a woman, but the two of them and God, relating spiritually and remaining committed to the other for a lifetime. Wouldn't it be natural for God, the One who initiated the relationship, to want a couple to bring their troubles, worries, and praises to Him on a regular, daily basis?

Step Five: Develop your relational skills

Did you know that you can develop your skills in relating to others just as you can develop skills in golf, cooking, or painting? Most of us develop some bad relational habits over the years, and we need training and practice to develop skill in practical, yet vital, areas of marriage, such as:

• Adjusting to your differences
• Resolving conflict
• Listening to each other
• Speaking the truth in love
• Communicating expectations
• Forgiving each other

Your determination to improve your skills in areas like these will show just how serious you are about revitalizing your marriage.

 

 

LOVE IN THE HOME

Author unknown - Thanks to Annamarie Kresge in Virginia for sending this.

If I live in a house of spotless beauty with everything in its place, but have not love, I am a housekeeper - not a homemaker. 
If I have time for waxing, polishing, and decorative achievements, but have not love, my children learn cleanliness - not godliness. 
Love leaves the dust in search of a child's laugh. 
Love smiles at the tiny fingerprints on a newly cleaned window. 
Love wipes away the tears before it wipes up the spilled milk. 
Love picks up the child before it picks up the toys. 
Love is present through the trials. 
Love reprimands, reproves, and is responsive. 
Love crawls with the baby, walks with the toddler, runs with the child, then stands aside to let the youth walk into adulthood. 
Love is the key that opens salvation's message to a child's heart. 
Before I became a mother I took glory in my house of perfection. 
Now I glory in God's perfection of my child.  As a mother, there is much I must teach my child, but the greatest of all is love. 

 

I DON'T DO WINDOWS - Sent by Nancy Marlow in PA, who received this from a friend.

http://www.frontiernet.net/~shelby304/specials/dontdowindows/nowindows.htm

 

 

PREVENTING COLDS AND FLU

By Lois Breneman, © 2008, Heart to Heart Newsletter, [email protected] 

Help curb colds and flu by taking a few simple measures:

* Eat a healthy diet and cut way back on sugar, which breaks down the immune system.

* Wash hands often.

* Have every family member use his own tube of toothpaste.  Sharing spreads germs.

* Refrain from storing everyone's toothbrush together in a cup or near each other.

* Use Clorox Wipes or rubbing alcohol on door knobs, light switches, computer keys, computer mouse, refrigerator door handle, dishwasher door handle, faucet handles, remote controls, etc.

* Disinfect the bathroom sinks and toilets.

* You may want to use a spray disinfectant to spray into the rooms of your home.

* When a sick family member shares a bathroom with you, use your own hand towel.  Hang it over your bath towel as a reminder. 

* Zycam is good to have on hand to chase away or lessen the severity of a cold coming on.
* Use diluted salt water in your nostrils using a ball syringe to clear out the sinuses.

 

20 WINTER PREPARATION TIPS - SAVING MONEY AND HAVING FUN TOO!

By Lois Breneman, © 2008, Heart to Heart Newsletter, [email protected] 

 

Winter has already hit sections of our country with snow!  We are all looking for ways to cut down on our heating bills, so here are a few tips that may help your family, with a couple of fun ideas as well.

 

Night-Time Thermostat Control ~ Invest in a power-saving programmable digital thermostat (about $100) that will automatically reset the thermostat to a lower temperature while you sleep under the warm blankets, and warm up the home before you get up. 

 

Attic Insulation ~ If you don't already have good attic insulation, this will save you a lot on heating costs (air conditioning in the summer as well).  We had a 10 inch layer of insulation blown into our attic years ago and it's saved us a great deal, even during the summer months.

Window Prep ~ The addition of storm windows or installing thermal pane windows help immensely to keep the cold outside.  When you feel the chill coming inside around your windows or see your curtains moving, that's a sure sign for action.  

 

Sealing and Caulking ~ Feel for cold air coming in around your windows and doors.  Check the seal between the window frame and the house.  Seal with caulk if it's not tight enough. The seal around door frames may also need to be replaced to save on heat escaping through the cracks in your home.  On a windy day, test with a burning candle.  If the air causes the flame to flicker, take action.

 

Stop Drafts Under Doors ~ Make draft dodgers using these simple instructions.  Cut a foam swimmer's noodle to fit across the bottom of the door frame.  Sew a fabric sleeve for it, closing one end.  Pour gravel or sand into the hole (for weight), and sew the other end shut.  Another method is to stuff a fabric sleeve with old cut up panty hose.  It will be heavy enough to stay put, and help keep the warm air in and the cold air out.

 

Pull Storm Doors Completely Shut ~ If they aren't pulled shut, it defeats their purpose.

 

Electric Heaters can help remove the chill in a cold bathroom, and are portable to use wherever necessary.  They can enable you to keep your thermostat lower, yet keep you warm.  Be careful not to leave heaters unattended, especially if small children are nearby. 

 

Lower the Thermostat During the Day and dress warmer to save dollars.

 

Cash in on Free Heat by doing household chores at strategic times to help heat up your home.  Bake an entire meal in the oven, run the dishwasher, run your clothes dryer, dehumidifier, water distiller, etc. and have your appliances work double duty for you.

Afternoon Sunshine can help warm your home.  If you have a southern exposure window with warm sunshine pouring through, open the drapes and make use of the solar heat.

 

Quilts, Afghans and Throws come in handy during these cold months, and add color and warmth to your home decorations as well, whether they are fabric, chenille, fleece, fur or yarn.

 

Stock Your Medicine Cabinet with supplies you may need during illness and possibly bad weather. 

 

Supplies for a Power Outage should be stocked and ready to use - kerosene lanterns, candles, matches, food staples, water, and possibly a generator and gasoline to run it, etc.  Plan a family project now to list all the things your family can do even during a power outage.  You will be amazed at how much you can still do.  Another fun project would be to make a list of all the items in your home that require electricity.  Then be thankful you aren't living in the Pioneer Days!  I love to watch movies of the Pioneer Days, but am glad the Lord didn't place me there!

 

Organize Your Game Closet now so you can quickly grab a game for family fun, as you eat popcorn popped in the fireplace, in case you lose power.

 

Candles add a lot of atmosphere, warmth, and fragrance, but be sure never to leave candles unattended or near anything that might catch fire.  Jar candles or candles enclosed in glass globes are safer, but still should never be left unattended.

 

Check Fire Alarms every month, but especially now, with more frequent use of candles, electric heaters, and fireplaces.

 

Warm Cribs/Beds ~ Lay an electric heating pad in your baby's bed, and remove it just before you put him down in his crib on a cold winter evening, especially if you turn the heat down. 

 

Don't Forget Your Perennial Plants ~ Save plants in cold climates by cutting the bottoms of plant containers (from plants you purchased at the nursery) and cover your delicate plants especially rose bushes.  There's no need to buy collars at the garden center.  Mound dirt both inside and outside the container, and your beautiful perennials will be able to survive for years.

 

Make Fire Starters ~ Dip pinecones in melted wax (old candles, paraffin, and some crayons for color).  Or pour melted wax over sawdust or wood shavings in cardboard egg cartons (about 1/4 cup sawdust per egg indention.  Allow to cool and harden with egg cartons on cookie sheets lined with wax paper.  Cut the individual fire starters apart.  For starting fires in the fireplace, put one "egg" at the bottom (no paper needed); add kindling and logs. 

 

Low-Cost Sledding Idea ~ Lisa Larson, a friend in Missouri shared how her son, Lance, came up with a great low-cost sledding idea last winter!  He and his 16 month old little Caleb enjoyed a sledding day in Virginia on a black trash bag!  I guess he learned quite a bit about utilizing resources around the house and being thrifty!  
        I also remember the great fun (and hard work) growing up on a farm in Pennsylvania!  We slid down the hill in the pasture using cardboard.  We turned up the front end and held on to that.  At the bottom of the hill, we'd go up over the bank of our eight-foot deep pond and continue to glide across the ice!  What great fun! ~ Lois

 

 

FROM A STRICTLY MATHEMATICAL VIEWPOINT
Author unknown

What equals 100%?  What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Did you ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations where someone wants us to give over 100%.

How about achieving 101%?  What equals 100% in life?

 

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26,

Then H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K would be 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
and K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E would be 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%.
But A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E would be 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%.

And look how far the love of God will take you:
L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D      12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4 - 101%!

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close,
and Attitude will get you there,
it's the Love of God that will put you over the top!

 

 

DISCIPLESHIP ASSIGNMENTS WITH DAD

By Julie Druck, Editor of A Heart for Home - Used by permission

(Note from Lois:  This is a wonderful idea for dads to live out their spiritual leadership with their children, whether your family is homeschooling or not.  It will make a lasting impact on children's lives, develop their spiritual growth, and help create a closer family relationship. )

 

As the boys get older, Marty has been such a huge help in planning and giving ideas for our homeschool journey.  One of the things he began a few months ago is such a great idea that I wanted to share it here.  Each week Marty gives each of the boys an assignment pertaining to God’s Word.  He tailors it to each one – recently he asked Ben to study on what relevance the Ten Commandments has to his life, Caleb was to research what the Bible says about baptism and how it pertains to him, and Eli was to explain to his dad how he would share the plan of salvation with an unbeliever.  I LOVE that he is doing this!  It’s teaching the boys so many things - how to study the Word, how to apply what the Bible teaches to their own lives, how to think on their own, as well as promoting communication skills.  Through this, Marty is also teaching them how to use a variety of tools and resources in the study of Scripture whether commentaries, online resources, etc.  I so enjoy hearing each of the boys engage in spiritual discussions with their daddy – it is an encouragement to their faith and to mine, too!

Written by Julie A. Druck ([email protected]) of York, Pennsylvania, U.S.A.

To subscribe, send a blank e-mail to:  [email protected]

To send a personal e-mail, write to:  [email protected]

To view Julie's blog, visit:  www.lifeinskunkhollow.blogspot.com

10 WAYS TO CORRECT BEHAVIOR WITHOUT CRUSHING CHARACTER
Author:Jim  Burns, Ph.D.
http://www.homeword.com - Used by permission
 
Have you  ever noticed how many life lessons you can learn in a garden? In a few cubic yards of dirt, rocks and bugs, you can see the whole life saga unfold before your eyes – prepare the soil, plant the seeds, nourish them so the plants will  grow and then harvest the crop (or enjoy the flowers). Sounds so simple, doesn’t  it! That is, of course, until the crabgrass creeps in or the weather turns harsh or your interest in tending wanes. How easy it is for a growing garden to turn into wasteland of weeds. At that point, the gardener has two choices – either  trash the garden and start again; or remove what shouldn’t be there and replenish what should.
 
If you’re a parent, congratulations . . . the Creator has blessed you with a “garden” of sorts. The “crop” consists of children – curious, creative creatures prone to making mistakes. When these “weeds” crop up in their character, however, you do not have the option of trashing the entire “garden.”  The key is to learn how to correct the behavior and salvage the spirit of the child at the same time.
 
Over the years, I’ve developed 10 ways you can do so. They aren’t perfect, and they may need to be modified somewhat to adapt to certain  personality types. But, by and large, they’re effective.
 
1. Discipline with Consistency  Remember how many times you fell  off that two-wheeler before you finally got your balance? Same holds true for  your kids. Little ones may repeat the same bad behavior time after time after  time. Remember Ephesians 6 (especially you, Dad), and consistently show them the right behavior. No need to lose your cool doing so, either.
 
2. Clearly  Express Your Expectations More often than not, children generally want to please  their parents. When they do, they feel a great sense of security. But when they don’t, they’ll react in one of two ways. They’ll either feel miserable for disappointing you, or defiant and defensive because they know you’re upset. They  need to know that they’ve broken a rule, nothing more. They’re in no danger of losing your love. Clearly expressing a consistent standard goes a long way toward helping a child correct bad behavior on his or her own.
 
3. Involve  Your Child in Consequential Decision-Making  If you’re already putting the  first two principles in action, this one’s a no-brainer. You’ve established the  rules. You correct bad behavior consistently (in other words, there’s no getting  around the consequences). Now, you give the child the opportunity to take real ownership for their actions by determining their own
consequences (or helping to establish them, at least).

4. “Let the Punishment Fit the Crime” As obvious as this might sound, I’m always amazed to hear of a parent who grounded his daughter for a month because she forgot to set the table for dinner . . .  once. A missed homework assignment might be grounds for a night without  television; coming home four hours past curfew should warrant a more serious consequence.
 
5. Discipline Calmly Ever heard the expression, “Perception is reality?” Well, it is – especially when you need to discipline your kids.  When you’re upset, you’re in no shape to mete out effective discipline. There’s a difference between punishment and discipline . . . and the difference is control. The out-of-control parent punishes a child out of anger; the parent in  control disciplines to correct bad behavior.
 
6. Draw Up a “Family  Contract” Having trouble getting your child to remember to keep his room picked  up? Get it in writing! Family Contracts are excellent tools for helping your kids to learn what family rules are most important. You can make them for any of a number of desired responses (eg homework, curfew, television viewing, music listening, etc). Click here for a sample contract – but not until you get to the  end of this list!
 
7. Remember “the 3 R’s” When it comes to keeping a child’s spirit open in the midst of discipline, remember – “Rules without  Relationship leads to Rebellion.” After all . . . we’re trying to correct behavior without crushing character here, right? Parenting involves more than  “laying down the law.” The kind of relationship your children have with you will  determine the way they interact with everyone else they meet in this life.
 
8. Communication is the Key to Keeping the Spirit Open When the  discipline is done, chances are your kids will want to hole up in their rooms  and sulk. Don’t let ‘em. Scripture commands us to talk about our faith with our children “when we’re lying down and rising up.” Discipline is just one part of the faith journey. While your child might need a good “pout” every now and again, resist the temptation to let them stew too long. (And remember, Mom and  Dad – no pouting from you either. I know parenting can be tough. But hang in there – it’s worth it!)
 
9. Your Words Can have Power – so use them  wisely! Your words can either build up or destroy your children. When a child’s spirit is broken because of bad or inappropriate behavior, make sure you attack  the behavior – not the child.
 
10. Choose Your Battles Wisely If you’re finding yourself growing more and more defensive when your kids act up, chances are you’re trying to manage too many battles on too many fronts. Now, I’m not saying you should ease up on your kids when they really need your discipline –  rather, make sure you do battle over things that are really worth fighting for  (eg sexual purity, performance in school, etc) instead of those where a healthy  compromise will do (eg keeping the room straight, cleaning up after the family  pet). Children can be unbelievably resilient . . . but they’re still precious cargo. Handle them with care. Correct behavior when necessary. Pray like their lives depend on it – because, when you get right down to it, they do!

HUMOR IN THE FAMILY
From Heather Farmer in Virginia ~ Your "Sunday morning tips" (in the 10/1/08 newsletter) brought back a funny memory.  When our boys were about 3 and 5 years old, we tried a new Sunday morning routine.  We tried to be more "peaceful " preparing for church.  We had been doing this for a few weeks.  On the way home from church, my little boy started out, "Mommy, know what I love about Sundays now?... Scooby Doo is on TV when we get home!"   I was really hoping he was going to comment in a more spiritual way!!!  

From Donna Kauffman in Pennsylvania, mother of 3, grandmother of 9.  She send a newsletter, Treasures from My Heart to Yours. http://treasuresbooks.bravehost.com

        My three year old grandsons ditto their farmer daddy. While my daughter, Rachel, and her husband, Glen, went to pick up their new adopted son, Kaiden, the three youngest children stayed with us. They loved the corn still standing in the garden. They set up for chopping. Their little bike was the chopper. One boy would run the chopper and the other two children ran the trucks. One truck would drive along side the chopper until it was “filled”. The truck driving right behind the first truck would move into place beside the chopper while truck 1 sped away and unloaded in the “pretend” trench. Soon truck 1 was back in place behind truck 2 that was still filling right along side the chopper. Suddenly truck 2 was full and away it sped and truck 1 moved back into place. On and on the day wore and the children chopped to their heart’s content.
         When we took the children home to meet their new brother and join the family, Jackson said to his daddy, “We got the front field chopped and the trench covered.”  Maybe you have to be acquainted with farming to appreciate this, or maybe you just have to be Grandma. 

 

        Lois: Tiny tots are so creative!  Our 14 month old granddaughter, Ryan Elizabeth, showed us her creative side last month while we visited her family in Georgia for a week.  She turned a large Pampers diaper box into a slippery sliding board!  She was so proud of her invention without anyone's help, and it surprised me to see her climb on top and slide down the crease made by the weight of her little body! 

        On our last day of a wonderful visit, as Pawpa and Grammie got into their car and backed out of the driveway, Ryan was in her mother's arms, watching us so seriously, with a questioning look on her face.  That look quickly turned into a frown and soon she was crying as we left their home after playing with her for a week!

        This morning my daughter, Joy, called to say, "You won't believe what Ryan is doing right now!"  She was dusting the bookshelves with her "silky."  She had seen me cleaning and polishing lots of shelves in her home on our visit.  While her mother and I were on the phone, she also broke the code for getting into a child-proof kitchen drawer, and was tossing all the clean dishtowels and dishcloths on the floor!  Her pawpa had just installed the drawer locks while we were there, but they were used for her big brother - so maybe were not quite as strong as before. 

 

 

CHILDREN AND GOD
Author unknown - Thanks to Jean Breneman, a great-grandmother in PA, for these! 

Did Noah Fish? ~ A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"  "No,' replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"
 
Lot's Wife ~ The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason interrupted, "My Mommy looked back once while she was driving," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"

Moses and the Red Sea ~ Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt.  When he got to the Red Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely.  Then he radioed headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"

The Lord Is My Shepherd ~  A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23.   She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter. Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn't remember the Psalm.   After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd, and that's all I need to know."

 

Unanswered Prayer ~ The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon.  One day, she asked him why. "Well, Honey,' he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. "I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon." "How come He doesn't answer it?'' she asked.

Being Thankful ~  A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, "So your mother says your prayers for you each night?  That's very commendable.  What does she say?"  The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"

Untimely Answered Prayer ~ During the minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back pews.  Tommy's mother was horrified.  She pinched him into silence and, after church, asked, "Tommy, whatever made you do such a thing?" Tommy answered, soberly, "I asked God to teach me to whistle, and He did!"

Time to Pray ~ A pastor asked a little boy if he said his prayers every night.  "Yes, sir," the boy replied.  "And, do you always say them in the morning, too?" the pastor asked.  "No sir," the boy replied. "I ain't scared in the daytime."

All Men / All Girls ~ When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past).  For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls." This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing.  My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?"  Her response, "Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying 'All Men'!"

 

Say A Prayer ~ Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his grandmother's house.  Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served.  When little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.  "Johnny!  Please wait until we say our prayer." said his mother.  "I don't need to," the boy replied.  "Of course, you do," his mother insisted. "We always say a prayer before eating at our house." "That's at our house," Johnny explained. "But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to cook!"

 

DO WE TREASURE THE PRECIOUS WORD OF GOD THIS MUCH?

By Barb Campbell in Mississippi - with a quote from a book she read.

        The story below is in the introduction section of the book, Words That Hurt, Words That Heal by Carole Mayhill.  I was so moved when I read it and wanted to share it.  Carole Mayhill was at a conference and heard someone tell this story.  The speaker is referred to here :

 

        On a recent visit to an Asian church, he sat next to a small woman whose hands were so crippled she could not hold the hymn book.  Following the service, he turned to her and asked, "Do you have a Bible?"

        "No," she said softly.
        "Would you like to have one?" he queried.
        "Oh, yes!" Her face brightened.
        "If you will come back to my hotel, I will give you one," offered Dennis.  As they walked back to his hotel, Dennis asked the diminutive woman about her hands.  She told him the following story.
       
        "When the soldiers were searching for all Bibles, hymn books and religious materials, they came to my door.  I had hidden my Bible under the cold ashes of my stove, but they knew all the places to look. As they were taking my Bible from my house, I grabbed it and said, 'Oh, please don't take my Bible.  It's all that I have to tell me about my Jesus.'"
        "The men said, 'It's nothing but a book of fables.  Give it to us, old woman.'"
        "But again I cried, 'Oh, please don't take it.  It's all that I have that tells me about my Jesus.'"
        The woman said they took her outside, stripped her, and put her up on a platform to shame her before the crowds.  For four hours she sat with the Bible clutched to her naked breast, head down as the crowds mocked and spit on her.  They thought she was ashamed, but she was praying.
        She continued, "After four hours they again tried to take my Bible, but I clung to it and said, 'Please don't take it.  It's all that I have that tells me about my Jesus.'"
        Angrily they spread her out in the dirt with hands clasped and arms stretched over her head and beat her hands with a hammer until they were nothing but pulp.  To this day she cannot even feed herself.

        Barb again:  After reading this, I had to think if I love the Word of God that much.  I mean I have several Bibles. The main one is falling apart and I have thought of replacing it, but something has held me back.  After reading this, I think I will keep taping my loose pages and not worry about the look of my cover.  Instead, I think my money might be better used providing a Bible for someone who isn't privileged to have one, much less 3 or 4! 

 

 

PRAY! THE STAKES COULDN'T BE HIGHER IN THIS CRUCIAL ELECTION
There are so many Family Issues and Christian Values that will be affected by this election: religious freedom, whether millions of precious and innocent unborn babies will be given a chance for life or continue being put to death, the definition of marriage, Supreme Court appointments for life, employment rates, whether small businesses can flourish, taxes, the economy, how hiring may change for churches as well as Christian schools and businesses, etc.  We cannot afford to stand by and not vote intelligently.  PRAY! 

 

Please Read Dr. James Dobson's October Letter by going to this site and scrolling down to the end on the right side - www.focusonthefamily.org.  This letter is very enlightening concerning the election and the future of America in regards to our children and grandchildren's future.

 

The Definition of Marriage will be defined in three states on Nov. 4th!

Just a few days from now, California, Arizona and Florida will have the chance to protect the definition of marriage as "One Man and One Woman" as citizens go to the polls on Election Day!  Please pray and vote your values!  It could go either way!  Every vote counts and this is the most crucial election ever!

                                           

 

  Please remember to pray for each dear Heart to Heart lady and her family as you receive your newsletter.  Many ladies are going through very tough times and need our prayers!
   Pray each day for the protection of our troops, as well as for their families left at home!

(¨`·.·´¨)                       God bless you and your family and keep you in His loving care!

 `·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)                             And remember, I love to hear from you dear ladies!

      `·.¸.·´                                                 Your Heart to Heart friend,                                                                

"Heart to Heart"                                                                               Lois   

                    (II Chronicles 7:14  (Click on the "7" and go down to verse 14 to read this verse)

 

The purpose of the Heart to Heart Newsletter is to encourage women and build biblical values into daily living through practical creative ideas for the Christian family regarding marriage, children, homemaking, and much more.  Receive this free bimonthly newsletter by listing your name, city, state, e-mail address, and name of your referral person and sending it to Lois at <a title=mailto:jhbreneman@... href="mailto:[email protected]">[email protected].  New subscribers will receive a Welcome, a "Start-Up Kit," and several recent newsletters.

 

Disclaimer: Various websites may be given as credits or to supply additional information for readers.  However, all the views and advertisements represented by websites in this newsletter are not necessarily the views of the editor.  Please use your own discretion and common sense regarding all information given in this newsletter.