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2/1/07 8th ANNIVERSARY, 14 TIPS, MARRIAGE, CLUTTER, GAME, ORGANIZATION

#1 · February 1, 2007, 5:26 pm

Quote from Forum Archives on February 1, 2007, 5:26 pm
Posted by: jhbreneman <jhbreneman@...>
HEART TO HEART NEWSLETTER
ENCOURAGEMENT TO WOMEN
Compiled especially for you with love by Lois Breneman

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2/1/07 8th ANNIVERSARY, 14 TIPS, MARRIAGE, CLUTTER, GAME, ORGANIZATION

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IN THIS ISSUE:

EIGHTH ANNIVERSARY FOR "HEART TO HEART"

A TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD MADE OUR FAMILY'S DREAM COME TRUE

A TESTIMONY OF GOD TENDERLY CALMING MY ANXIOUS HEART

GOD'S SPECIAL VALENTINE TO YOU

14 FUN VALENTINE'S DAY TIPS FOR FEBRUARY 14

A KNEE-PRINT VALENTINE
ABOUT MARRIAGE
THE COST OF CLUTTER

NUTS AND BOLTS ~ A SORTING GAME FOR CHILDREN

CLUTTER, CLUTTER, TOIL AND TROUBLE

ORGANIZE YOUR DOCUMENTS

CHOOSING TO PLAY THE ACCORDIAN - HOW TO ORGANIZE HOMEWORK
ANOTHER CHORE / AWARD CHART IDEA - A NICE TIME SAVER

SOME KIDS ARE JUST CHALLENGING

SPECIAL QUOTES

EIGHTH ANNIVERSARY FOR "HEART TO HEART"

Note from Lois: Ladies, I share these comments with permission from each of these Heart to Heart ladies, not to give myself a pat on the back, but for the purpose of helping you know how much the younger women need the older women to walk along side of them and shower them with biblical and practical guidance and teaching, as well as encouragement and blessing. Many more women are needed in ministries of this type. And if you think, "Well, I'm certainly not an 'older woman' yet," as Titus 2 speaks about, it's easy to find women younger than you are who would benefit by your teaching, encouragement and blessing! It's wonderful to be there for your daughters and daughters-in-law, but how about reaching out to a broader group of ladies who might not have a mentor. Sometimes they simply want to have someone listen to them. How about starting by inviting a younger woman to lunch just to show her that you care?

Comments from "Heart to Heart" ladies:

Thanks for your newsletters - They are such a blessing!! I really feel a lot like I have nobody behind me, encouraging me. It's nice to know there are people like yourself so willing to give of yourself to bless moms like me. I have 8 children, 3 that we adopted from Liberia. Life, this year has been so challenging and we get very little encouragement. So God bless you for being willing to share all of this with me. - Blessings, Hannah Babiak in Wisconsin

Thanks for your newsletter. I look forward to it and read every word and then pass it along to my three daughters. - Sharon in New Jersey

I just wanted to let you know how much I've enjoyed your newsletters. They are so interesting and informative and most of all, full of the love of God. Thanks for sharing your special kind of encouragement! You're a real blessing to many people. You are one of the people who help me to stay glad I'm a homeschool mom by keeping my focus on what's truly important. We have 4 children, 2 homeschooling and 2 in "preschool" (2 girls and 2 boys, ages 3-10). They sure keep me busy, but it's wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I also wanted to mention how much I've enjoyed the special Christmas issues! Thanks for all your hard work! I was feeling a bit at a loss trying to get ready for the holidays, but you've given me more than enough to do! ;o) Great ideas! ~ Blessings, Amy Sturgeon in Tennessee

I just wanted to take a minute and let you know what a blessing your newsletters are to me. I'm a homeschool mom to 5 with another on the way in January. I print your newsletters out and read them when the kids are in bed. Please keep sending them; they're blessing many people. Many blessings, Lisa Ulakovits in Florida

Something that jumped out at me from your current newsletter (1/1/07) was your description of how our homes should be: " a peaceful haven of rest." I love that! I believe that type of "haven" only happens as husbands and wives show RESPECT for one another. I believe that husbands especially have a deep need for their wives to show them respect. Young wives should take note ... if they just make one small change .... begin to show respect to their husbands (whether they think he deserves it or not!), and they will both reap rich dividends!! One of Tim and my favorite scriptures is Isaiah 32:18 amp. "My people dwell in a peaceable habitation, a safe dwelling, in quiet resting places." We personalize and pray that scripture over our home often! May 2007 be your best year ever! Love, Debbie Flack in Virginia

Our family is back in Ukraine again. I would like to be added to your list again, using my Ukrainian email address. I had requested that you send it to our stateside computer which you did. Thank you so much. I would appreciate if you would continue to send your newsletter to that address. My daughter-in-law has taken our computer to her home and really enjoys reading your newsletters. ~ Pat Lehigh in Ukraine

I just wanted to let you know that both my mother and I enjoy these Heart to Heart letters so much. We met you at my sister's yardsale. I have been meaning to email you for a long while now and my mother also. She prints out the newsletters to read on the go and always asks if I've read "this or that" and pulls it out of her bag if I haven't yet. Anyhow we just both want you to know you are appreciated and enjoyed. Thank you. Especially these wonderful Christmas stories - they are so special and heartwarming. Thank you again. ~ Love, Kendra Branum in Virginia

I received your newsletter, after many forwards from others, ending with me. I read and reread it and greatly appreciated the articles and your purpose in having the Newsletter. I would like to be included on your mailing list, please. The articles really hit home and were just what I needed! My sincere thanks to you. (Then on 2/1/07)  I cant begin to express how much I have enjoyed the few I have received.   My grandchildren and I had great fun and made wonderful memories with the ideas you sent at Christmas. May God continue to bless you as you continue on with His work. ~ Elaine Whiddon in Virginia

May I forward this to my mother back home in Ohio? Is this allowed? Thank you for this gift. It's the best one I've gotten this year. I desire to follow the Lord. God bless you and your home. ~ Laurie White from Ohio, but living happily with her family in Lincolnshire England

A TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD MADE OUR FAMILY'S DREAM COME TRUE

By Hannah Babiak in Wisconsin

Note from Lois: At my request, Hannah allowed me to share her letter with you, as well as the names and ages of the eight Babiak children: Leah (adopted from Liberia) 13; Kaila (biological) 12; Robert (adopted from Liberia) 12; Sarah (adopted from Liberia) 11; Michael (bio) 9; Rachel (bio) 7; Kendra (bio) 5; Jared (bio) 2

Today is the one year anniversary of our new children coming home. It's been an amazing year!

Today we celebrated our "Gotcha Day" except that is not what our children wanted to call it. They named it "Family Day" because they said, "It's the day we were waiting for all our lives - to have a family!" We were all sick with colds and so the day didn't go exactly how we had planned, but God blessed our day tremendously. I had made them all a special pillowcase and painted their names on it and Family Day, We love you and John 14:18 which says, "I will not leave you as orphans." The pillowcases represented that they will now always have a comfortable place to lay their heads. A couple of my children never even had a pillow case before coming to our home and Robert never even had a pillow until he came here. We got the idea from a friend of mine and it was a big hit. They loved it. They laid out their empty pillow cases on the couch Saturday night and on Family Day they woke up to them filled with presents.

The real blessing was a huge surprise. Their tutor (Aunt Jean) had taken Leah shopping to buy a new "Math Book." Well, that wasn't all they bought. They bought stuff for the children to make gifts for me and dad. It was such a surprise. Leah made me an apron and she painted it with the words that said, "Big family meals make BIG mess - that's why I need this Apron." It was so cute!!! She had painted kitchen tools on it also. Leah made dad a picture frame that she painted and put lighthouses on and a picture of her and dad from when dad gave her the purity ring. It was very special. He was very blessed. Sarah made me a beautiful jewelry box that she painted "Sweet Mom" on. Robert made dad a box to keep his stuff in. Kaila shocked us by making us a wonderful scrapbook that said "Our Dream" on the front and then went through our lives together from the time Bob and I got married to having Kaila, then Michael, our miscarried baby Will, then Rachel, then Kendra, our miscarried baby Mia, then Jared, followed by our long distance son, Sylvester and then the arrival of Sarah, Leah and Robert and ended it with a page that said, "Our dream has come true!" It was so special. Nobody has ever made an album for us - I'm always the one that makes them. So it was a real big blessing.

The real tear jerker was a letter that Leah wrote to us:

Dear Mom and Dad,

I love you guys so much. I want to tell you guys that I love you and I am glad to be in this family. I spent 12 years without mother and father. I wanted a mom and dad very bad. I prayed that God would give me a mom and dad one day. One day God answered my prayer by giving me you guys. It was so hard for me to be without a mom and dad. When I was in Liberia, I used to think that God had forgotten me. I was always thinking I would not be able to come to America ever. God helped me to have lots of faith. When I saw a picture of you guys, I knew that God answered my prayer. God worked everything out and I was able to come to this family. I will never forget the first time I met you guys. I was so happy. Nothing else is important to me but God and you both. I know that God is always there for everything we need. We just need to trust in God. I learned a lot of things in this family. You are both so special to me. I love you both and will never forget your love for me. You have given me everything I need. I pray that I will be able to give you something someday. Thank you for loving me all of the time. Love, Leah Faith Babiak

The day was filled with all their favorite foods. Sarah was reminiscing and saying how when she first came here, she hated American food and now she loves it so much that she never wants to live without it again. It was cute! We spent much time watching videos of when they first came home and their lives over the past year. We are amazed at their progress. They have transformed into totally different children than what they were when they first came. Some of it is really miraculous! They have recovered their childhood, they are creative and fun and love to play and imagine now. They didn't know how to do any of that when they came. They've also learned to work as a team and to care for others in the family. We are a real family unit now. There have been many challenges this year. Some were flat out difficult and heart breaking. But through God, we persevered and it has paid off in ways we never could have expected. We are all so blessed! My heart is filled to overflowing at God's goodness toward our family. My children are all inspirations to me and they inspire me day by day.

I wanted to thank you all one more time for your many prayers and support over the last couple of years. God has made us into a new family. We'll never be like we were before and I am so glad about that. I love what we have become. We have all grown in tremendous ways this past year and God has molded us into more of what He wants us to be.   We praise Him for His wonderful work in our lives.

A TESTIMONY OF GOD TENDERLY CALMING MY ANXIOUS HEART

By Penny Yonts in Virginia

What a great and glorious year this is going to be! I'm hanging on to Jeremiah 29:11-13 for dear life! 🙂 Lessons for me are super duper hard to learn because I fight God on everything. I pray and I beg God to not let me live a defeated life all the while pulling against Him. I pleaded with God a little over a month ago not to let me live a defeated life, but a victorious life for my sake and my family's sake. As I was driving I was crying and pleading quietly; and God so tenderly calmed my spirit by drawing my attention to His beautiful mountain where the sun was shining so beautifully on part of it and shading the rest - IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! I felt so loved by God at that moment because He saw His child being tormented and He quieted me. "The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; He will save, He will rejoice over thee with joy; He will rest in His love, He will joy over thee with singing.," - Zephaniah 3:17. I love it when God's word becomes real to me. I do that with my children too. When they are just so upset about something I will draw their attention away to something nice.

GOD'S SPECIAL VALENTINE TO YOU

      "For God so loV ed the world,
             That He gA ve
                   His onL y
                   BegottE n
                         SoN
                             T hat whosoever
              Believeth I n Him
                 Should N ot perish,
              But have E verlasting life."
                                           John 3:16

FOURTEEN FUN VALENTINE'S DAY TIPS FOR FEBRUARY 14

By Lois Breneman, © 2007, Heart to Heart Newsletter, [email protected]

Make a natural strawberry-banana ice cream by whirling frozen strawberries and frozen bananas in a blender with milk, a little vanilla flavoring and either honey or stevia powder for sweetness. For a banana spilt, serve with a slice of banana, a fresh strawberry and a sprig of mint on top.

Make heart-shaped garnishes out of fresh sliced strawberries. If the slices don't already look like a heart, trim them a bit with a sharp paring knife. Use to garnish salads, ice cream, cakes.

Make heart-shaped cupcakes by placing a marble between the muffin tin hole and the muffin liner. Fill 2/3 full and bake according to the recipe.

Bake meatloaf in a heart-shaped cake pan or in individual heart-shaped gelatin pans.

Make a heart-shaped pizza crust! Then add all the usual toppings!

Cut sandwich bread with a heart-shaped cookie cutter! But save the trimmings to make croutons with olive oil, butter, herbs and spices.

Make a gelatin mold in a heart-shaped mold, or individual heart-shaped molds. For a healthy version, use unflavored gelatin and follow a recipe on the box, using fruit juices and fruit.

Try a brown rice dish made in a greased heart-shaped mold with pimento for red color.

Make free-form heart pancakes. Serve with whipped cream and strawberries.

If you want to make mashed potatoes with a healthier pink tint than red food coloring, add a bit of pureed red beets. It won't be enough to change the flavor. You can also sneak beets into spaghetti sauce easily. They'll never know!

Make a large heart-shaped cake by baking one round 9 inch layer and one 9 inch square layer. This will take more than one cake mix, so plan on a few cupcakes to freeze too. Cut the round cake in half and fit the two halves to two adjacent sides of the square layer. And there you are! You've got a perfect heart! Frost the cake and place clean silk roses along the top left of the heart. You may want to decorate the edges with a cake decorator as well. But first write "I love you" on the cake or choose one of the following scriptures verses instead.  A simple verse on a cake is a good visual lesson for children. Talk about the scripture and memorize it together with your family before you dig in!

Above all else, guard your heart. - Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Draw near with a true heart. - Hebrews 10:22

Love the Lord with all your heart. - Luke 10:27

Blessed are the pure in heart. - Matthew 5:8

I have loved you with an everlasting love. - Jeremiah 31:3

Love is of God. - I John 4:7

Make handmade valentines for family and special friends. Some good ideas, along with pictures, are found at http://www.familycorner.com/homegarden/crafts/valentine_cards.shtml

Hide red felt hearts for your husband to find, as a message of your love for him. Where? In his closet, dresser drawers, car, desk drawer, tucked in his dinner napkin, in his Bible, etc.

Write love notes on paper hearts and hide them for your husband to find - all year long. Tell him why you love him as your husband; remind him of his good character traits and talents; tell him what a good father he is to your children and what a good husband he is to you. These last two tips can certainly be adapted to use with our children and grandchildren as well.

A KNEE-PRINT VALENTINE
By Susanne Scheppmann, Proverbs 31 Speaker Team Member, http://www.susanneonline.com/ - Used by permission

Key verse:
Mark 12:30, "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.'" (NIV)

Devotion:
Lacy white paper glued to bright red paper constructed to enchant others, cutout hearts inviting, "Be Mine Valentine! " and pastel candies with cute phrases provide a sweet conversation between two people. February is the month noted for Love.

However, after searching for just the right valentine card this year, it dawned on me that I can spend more time looking for an endearing phrase for my husband, than I do telling God how much I love Him. Personally, I have never seen a "valentine" card to God. Have you?

This February I will certainly bestow my love on the special people God has placed in my life, but I am also determined to love God "with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength." Why? Because the Apostle John writes this truth, "We love because he first loved us." (I John 4:19, NIV) The only reason I can even begin to love a Holy, Almighty God, is because he loved me by sending His son to die on a tortuous wooden cross, payment for my sin.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16 NIV)

He loved me first. He loved you first. Do you have a love relationship with Jesus Christ?   Perhaps, you feel unloved during the month of love, but you don't need to. There are four simple steps to beginning an eternal love relationship with Him.

Believe He is the Son of the Living God.
Believe He died for your sins and was resurrected to eternal life.
Ask for forgiveness of your sins.
Accept Him as Lord of your life.

Whether you have just begun a love relationship with Jesus or if you have journeyed with him for years, why not present Him with an outward display of your love?

My valentine message to Christ will be a special time on my knees. I pray that my creaking knees will be a sound of praise to His ears. The carpet indented with knee-print kisses and elbow-mark hugs on the sofa will be the loving signature of my devotion to Him. (And I will not make my usual list of needy requests.) This knee-print valentine will be just whispers of love, to a God who deserves complete and loving devotion in worship.

My Prayer for today:
Lord Jesus, I thank you for loving me enough to die on the Cross. Lord, I want you to know that I love you. I want to learn to love you more each day. Teach me how to love you with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.

Application steps:
Do you remember making valentines in school? Today take fifteen minutes and make a Valentine's Day card for God. It doesn't have to be beautiful, but it should be heartfelt. Dig out your glue gun, a red crayon, a few pieces of paper, and make a love note to God. Then hang it on your refrigerator as a reminder this week to tell God just how much you love Him.

Reflection points:
Do you know that God wants to be the love of your life?
How can you show God you love Him?
With whom can you share the story of God's love?

Power verses:
Psalm 42:8, "By day the Lord directs his love, at night his song is with me-- a prayer to the God of my life." (NIV)

Psalm 66:19-20, "But God has surely listened and heard my voice in prayer. Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me!" (NIV)

Jeremiah 33:3, " 'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.' " (NIV)

Zechariah 13:9, "...They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, 'They are my people,' and they will say, 'The Lord is our God.' " (NIV)

ABOUT MARRIAGE
By Donna Kauffman, Editor of E-mail Newsletter, Treasures From My Heart to Yours - [email protected] - http://treasuresbooks.blogspot.com/ - http://treasuresbooks.bravehost.com - Used by permission

I recently found a project to work on concerning marriage. Since I like projects like this anyway, I adapted it for me. And Im thinking about reviewing it twice a year, possibly in February and August. I believe to review these ideas periodically would help build a struggling marriage and further a growing marriage. See what you think.

1. List two ways you can remind your husband of things without nagging or treating him like a child.

2. List some of your habits that annoy your husband and one or two ways you can work at correcting them.

3. List three ways that you complete your husband. This would suggest ways youre his helper.

5. Consider two things you could do to help your husband more.

6. Make a list, as long as possible, of all his good points. Make a decision to warmly and sincerely share at least one word of appreciation with him every day.

7. List two things your husband does that irritates you. And two ideas for each of a wiser way of dealing with the irritations than you do at present.

8. List two areas in which you struggle to show respect to your husband. And two ideas for each one about how you can begin working at displaying a spirit of respect in those areas.

As I typed this up I wondered if it might also work in relating to our children. I think most of the eight points would adapt well to our relationship with them also. I bless you as you find numerous ways during the month of February to extend life and love into the hearts and lives of your husband and children.

THE COST OF CLUTTER
By Jill Cooper - www.LivingOnADime.com  - Used by permission

We live in a society of extremes. People seem to be extremely in debt, extremely overweight and extremely disorganized. People everywhere are trying to come up with new and better solutions to solve these problems but not many of their ideas are working.

It's because they are focusing on the wrong problem. For example, if your child comes to you and says, "I have a drug problem," you don't sit them down and say, "Well let's work on a way to get your grades up and then we'll work on your drug problem." How foolish that would be. The real problem is not the grades but the drugs. You take care of the drugs and the chances are pretty good that the grades will come up.

For some of us, instead of focusing on getting out of debt or losing weight, we need to first give more serious thought to becoming organized. Does that sound crazy, almost laughable? Before you start laughing too hard, look at these examples and see if you can relate.

How often do you go out to eat because your kitchen is a mess? If your kitchen is clean, chances are you would not only be more willing to fix dinner at home but in the morning you would fix breakfast and pack yourself a lunch too.

Here are some benefits of getting your kitchen organized:

You would save at least $5,000 a year for one person, $10,000 for two, and so on if you ate at home.

When you are organized you know what you have in your pantry, so don't buy ingredients that you already have and you don't throw out food you forgot you have.

You would be using your leftovers instead of tossing them.

You will start losing weight because you are preparing regular well balanced meals instead of eating fast food all the time. Besides the fact that homemade food generally has fewer calories than fast food, balanced meals create fewer cravings and this helps eliminate grazing.

Organizing can reduce your wardrobe and laundry costs.

Do you keep buying more clothes because you are gaining weight from fast food or from the stress of your clutter?

How big is your wardrobe? Do you or your children own 30 pairs of jeans at $60 a pop because you don't keep up with the laundry or because your closet is so stuffed you can't find anything? That adds up to $1,800 worth of jeans. If you cut it down to even 10 pairs you would save $1,200. How many tops do you own? How about those shoes? Before you say, "There is no way I have that many jeans, shoes, or tops!" go count you clothes. You may be surprised...

How often do you toss a suit jacket on the floor or on the furniture and then later have to have it dry cleaned because it's wrinkled? Just think what you could save on your dry cleaning bill if you keep a little more organized.

Organizing can save you money in every aspect of your life.

Do you buy new items because you can't find something? The cost of things like tools, glue, tape, ropes, garden tools, kitchen items, light bulbs, batteries, office supplies and other things really adds up.

How much do you pay each month in late fees on your bills because you can't find them, your checkbook or even a stamp to mail them?

Try something different!

So often we think that the solution to our debt problem is for both spouses to work outside the home. At times we even compound the problem when one or both spouses takes a second job. When both spouses work out of the home, who takes care of the house? Frequently, there is a constant battle between them about whose job it is to take care of some element of the housework. After all, the husband has been out working all day, so he doesn't feel like it. Oh, but the wife has been working, too so why can't she take a break?

Imagine if your boss at work decided to work a second full time job. How would this impact your work place? Who would you ask if you couldn't find products for your customers? What if there was no change because your boss was at his other job until after the bank closed? What if you needed help or advice from your boss, but he said, "Not now... I'm too tired from my other job?" How long would that company last? The same thing happens in many homes every day.

Would your family be better served if one spouse stayed home? Someone needs to be responsible for the bulk of the care and maintenance of the home and family. Ideally, everyone will share the work, but like in any other business there has to be one person in charge. Otherwise, everyone will avoid the work and everything will descend into chaos.

If this sounds like your home, you might sit down with your spouse and seriously consider whether one of you might take off of work to try to get your home in order. Instead of thinking of staying at home as a prison sentence, think of it as another job to help save you money, reduce family stress and add more family comfort.

If you're considering staying home, get rid of the emotions and, with pen and paper (hopefully you can find one) in hand, write down the ways that being disorganized is costing you money. Be honest and try to cover even the small things. You might find that the money you are spending dealing with disorganization is equal to or more than one spouse's take home pay. Organization has nothing to do with what is politically correct or what the media or other people tell you that you need to do. It is a practical choice that you can make. I am NOT saying that you can't work doing something that you love. I am saying that regardless of how your family handles it, the work of keeping the home has to get done.

If you feel that you and your spouse have to or both want to work, then try to come up with other ideas.

Would spending your vacation organizing things and deep cleaning give you enough of a jump start to help keep things organized? Maybe once you organized everything you could consider hiring someone to clean your house once a week. Before you say you can't afford it, think about this-- Which would cost less? -- Paying someone $50 a week to clean your house or paying for all the things that cost you money because you are not organized?

Consider whether it would be worth one spouse working part time instead of full time.

Try one simple thing like hanging up your clothes so you don't have cleaners expense or getting the whole family to pitch in with cleaning the kitchen at the end of each meal.

Maybe you do have the time, but you just don't know how to get organized. If that is the case, then learn. Check out books at the library or search for help on the Internet. Better yet, find someone you know who is organized and ask them to teach you. Don't be embarrassed to do this. Most people are more than willing to show you how to do things. Remember, those older women (and men) that seem to have it all together now didn't start out that way. They've had 20 years or more practice and they remember what it was like to not have a clue where to start. Just ask.

Instead of wasting your time and energy on trying to bail the water out of your sinking boat by bailing faster or using a bigger bucket, fix the hole. CLEAN UP THE CLUTTER AND SAVE.

NUTS AND BOLTS ~ A SORTING GAME FOR CHILDREN

While playing this game, be sure your young child is being watched carefully by an adult or older child, so none of these items is swallowed, and beans don't end up being stuck in little ears and noses!

You will need a box (about the size of a stationery box) an egg carton for 18 eggs, four to five each of eighteen different small items. Items could be from your home workshop or the hardware store: 1/2-inch screws, 1-inch screws, 1 1/2-inch screws, small nuts, larger nuts, small bolts, larger bolts, small metal washers, medium metal washers, large metal washers, plastic washers and rubber washers, , etc.

How to play the game: Fill the box with all the objects. The object of the game is for the child to sort the objects into the 18 compartments of the egg carton.

Variation of Items: Use small items found around the house such as rubberbands, small paper clips, large paper clips, toothpicks, several varieties of buttons, safety pins, cut up plastic straws, beads, dried beans (different varieties), etc. Let the children help find items for the game. After your children master this game, let them help you sort through your clutter!

CLUTTER, CLUTTER, TOIL AND TROUBLE
By Kayla Fay, Editor of E-mail Newsletter, An Ounce of Ketchup - A great resource for moms of children with ADHD, or any mom, for that matter!   http://www.goaskmom.com - Used by permission

There are several great online products to help you de-clutter and organize your stuff. My favorite resource is Fly Lady. She'll nag via email, and help you organize your life step by step - with no charge! If you're looking for a more immediate solution, try Clear Your Clutter, Clear Your Mind. Personal Organization Made Easy. I really like DeClutter Fast - Get Your Home In
Order!. It's a quick read, and offers an 'off the beaten path' approach to de-cluttering.

ORGANIZE YOUR DOCUMENTS
By Kayla Fay - http://www.goaskmom.com - Used by permission

Is your computer organized? Create folders for each person in your family, and a folder for each type of work you do (school, volunteer, financial, business, etc.) If you've never learned how to create folders so your files can be more easily found, here's how:

1. Go to 'My Documents' and open it.

2. Right click over a blank spot, go to "New" then "Folder". Backspace, and type in the name of your New Folder.

3. Drag the files from My Documents into the appropriate folder.

4. Teach your kids to do this. (They may already know how, and can teach you!)

CHOOSING TO PLAY THE ACCORDIAN - HOW TO ORGANIZE HOMEWORK
See more tips by Kayla Fay: http://www.goaskmom.com/that_works_adhd_inattentive/organize.html

Ben is in the sixth grade, and has classic disorganization problems. This semester, one of his teachers talked to Ben about why his grades were so low. He told her that he understood the work, and usually did it, but then he couldn't find it or forgot to turn it in. (Sound familiar?) This wise teacher then asked Ben to devise his own way to keep organized, and Ben chose to keep all his homework in an accordion folder. To his mother's joy and relief, Ben's grades have come up, mainly because his work is getting turned in. Letting Ben create his own strategy gave him ownership of the plan. He also had some insight into what would work and what wouldn't work for him.

ANOTHER CHORE / AWARD CHART IDEA - A NICE TIME SAVER

Thanks to Joanna (Joey) Claycomb in Virginia for this great tip!

When I read about your chore chart and award chart, I immediately thought of one that my sister uses. It has instructions, a reward system, etc., and it has worked very well for my sister and another friend of mine. While I know some ladies would want to make their own, I think a few may find this one a nice time-saver. Just a thought. Here is the link . . . http://www.onlineorganizing.com/ProductsPage.asp?name=I_Did_My_Chores

SOME KIDS ARE JUST CHALLENGING

Copyright 2007 Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller - All rights reserved - Used with permission.
http://effectiveparenting.org/ - For free e-mail parenting tips sign up: www.biblicalparenting.org

Parents sometimes feel that because their child is a challenge that they, as parents, are the problem. "If I would just do the right things then I wouldn't have this problem with my kids," they say. Of course, we, as parents can have a lot of influence on our kids, but it's certainly not the whole story.

Children aren't robots; they're people, and have a will of their own. You can influence but not control them. That's why parents must be praying for their kids often. God uses you, as a parent, to mold your kids. As you work on the heart of your child you will benefit by developing a character development plan uniquely tailored for each child.

Heres an idea: Fold a piece of paper to make three columns. In column one, list unwanted behaviors you see in your child. In many cases this is a long list but that's okay. Putting the problem on paper often helps sort it out. In the second column try to group the behaviors into character issues. We find that challenging children often lack qualities like self control, sensitivity, perseverance, and gentleness, just to name a few.

In the third column identify positive character qualities as headings and then specific behaviors you'd like to see to replace those unwanted behaviors. Taking this information, develop a strategy to motivate your child to make small changes.

Whatever you do, don't show the paper to your child. That's too much for any one person to see. Choose one character quality to work on and look for positive ways to correct as well as proactive ways to teach the new character quality.

You'll be surprised at the small steps of progress you'll see. But it's those steps of progress that will encourage you and your child. After all, in many homes children are making small steps of progress in the wrong direction so turning things around is a tremendous blessing.

If you'd like help developing an Action Plan for your child, consider a Phone Coaching Session with Dr. Scott Turansky. More details are available at www.effectiveparenting.org. Or learn more about this six-step character development plan in our book, "Home Improvement." To reach us via email: p[email protected].

SPECIAL QUOTES

A crushing hurt comes to our heart and the sympathizing, scarred hand of Christ presses the wound; and just for a moment,the pain seems to intensify,...but finally the bleeding stops. -- Beth Moore

Perhaps God brings us to the end of our resources so we can discover the vastness of His. -- Neil Anderson

Victory is the place where our breaking point becomes our turning point. -- L. Burt

                           Many Heart to Heart ladies and their families need our prayers, so

              please remember to pray for each Heart to Heart lady as you receive your newsletter.

(¨`·.·´¨)                     God bless you and your family and keep you in His loving care!

`·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)                         And remember, I love to hear from you dear ladies!

      `·.¸.·´                                              Your Heart to Heart friend,

                                                                                                 Lois



The purpose of the Heart to Heart Newsletter is to encourage women and build biblical values into daily living through practical creative ideas for the Christian family regarding marriage, children, homemaking, and much more. Receive this free bimonthly newsletter by sending your name, city, state, e-mail address, and name of your referral person to Lois at [email protected]. New subscribers will receive a "Start-Up Kit."

Disclaimer: Various web sites are given as credits or to supply additional information for readers. However, all the views and advertisements represented by web sites given in this newsletter are not necessarily the views of the editor. Please use your own discretion regarding all information given in this newsletter.
-- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: [email protected]   

Posted by: jhbreneman <jhbreneman@...>

HEART TO HEART NEWSLETTER
ENCOURAGEMENT TO WOMEN
Compiled especially for you with love by Lois Breneman

~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~ :~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~

2/1/07 8th ANNIVERSARY, 14 TIPS, MARRIAGE, CLUTTER, GAME, ORGANIZATION

~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~:~*~

IN THIS ISSUE:

EIGHTH ANNIVERSARY FOR "HEART TO HEART"

A TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD MADE OUR FAMILY'S DREAM COME TRUE

A TESTIMONY OF GOD TENDERLY CALMING MY ANXIOUS HEART

GOD'S SPECIAL VALENTINE TO YOU

14 FUN VALENTINE'S DAY TIPS FOR FEBRUARY 14

A KNEE-PRINT VALENTINE
ABOUT MARRIAGE
THE COST OF CLUTTER

NUTS AND BOLTS ~ A SORTING GAME FOR CHILDREN

CLUTTER, CLUTTER, TOIL AND TROUBLE

ORGANIZE YOUR DOCUMENTS

CHOOSING TO PLAY THE ACCORDIAN - HOW TO ORGANIZE HOMEWORK
ANOTHER CHORE / AWARD CHART IDEA - A NICE TIME SAVER

SOME KIDS ARE JUST CHALLENGING

SPECIAL QUOTES

EIGHTH ANNIVERSARY FOR "HEART TO HEART"

Note from Lois: Ladies, I share these comments with permission from each of these Heart to Heart ladies, not to give myself a pat on the back, but for the purpose of helping you know how much the younger women need the older women to walk along side of them and shower them with biblical and practical guidance and teaching, as well as encouragement and blessing. Many more women are needed in ministries of this type. And if you think, "Well, I'm certainly not an 'older woman' yet," as Titus 2 speaks about, it's easy to find women younger than you are who would benefit by your teaching, encouragement and blessing! It's wonderful to be there for your daughters and daughters-in-law, but how about reaching out to a broader group of ladies who might not have a mentor. Sometimes they simply want to have someone listen to them. How about starting by inviting a younger woman to lunch just to show her that you care?

Comments from "Heart to Heart" ladies:

Thanks for your newsletters - They are such a blessing!! I really feel a lot like I have nobody behind me, encouraging me. It's nice to know there are people like yourself so willing to give of yourself to bless moms like me. I have 8 children, 3 that we adopted from Liberia. Life, this year has been so challenging and we get very little encouragement. So God bless you for being willing to share all of this with me. - Blessings, Hannah Babiak in Wisconsin

Thanks for your newsletter. I look forward to it and read every word and then pass it along to my three daughters. - Sharon in New Jersey

I just wanted to let you know how much I've enjoyed your newsletters. They are so interesting and informative and most of all, full of the love of God. Thanks for sharing your special kind of encouragement! You're a real blessing to many people. You are one of the people who help me to stay glad I'm a homeschool mom by keeping my focus on what's truly important. We have 4 children, 2 homeschooling and 2 in "preschool" (2 girls and 2 boys, ages 3-10). They sure keep me busy, but it's wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I also wanted to mention how much I've enjoyed the special Christmas issues! Thanks for all your hard work! I was feeling a bit at a loss trying to get ready for the holidays, but you've given me more than enough to do! ;o) Great ideas! ~ Blessings, Amy Sturgeon in Tennessee

I just wanted to take a minute and let you know what a blessing your newsletters are to me. I'm a homeschool mom to 5 with another on the way in January. I print your newsletters out and read them when the kids are in bed. Please keep sending them; they're blessing many people. Many blessings, Lisa Ulakovits in Florida

Something that jumped out at me from your current newsletter (1/1/07) was your description of how our homes should be: " a peaceful haven of rest." I love that! I believe that type of "haven" only happens as husbands and wives show RESPECT for one another. I believe that husbands especially have a deep need for their wives to show them respect. Young wives should take note ... if they just make one small change .... begin to show respect to their husbands (whether they think he deserves it or not!), and they will both reap rich dividends!! One of Tim and my favorite scriptures is Isaiah 32:18 amp. "My people dwell in a peaceable habitation, a safe dwelling, in quiet resting places." We personalize and pray that scripture over our home often! May 2007 be your best year ever! Love, Debbie Flack in Virginia

Our family is back in Ukraine again. I would like to be added to your list again, using my Ukrainian email address. I had requested that you send it to our stateside computer which you did. Thank you so much. I would appreciate if you would continue to send your newsletter to that address. My daughter-in-law has taken our computer to her home and really enjoys reading your newsletters. ~ Pat Lehigh in Ukraine

I just wanted to let you know that both my mother and I enjoy these Heart to Heart letters so much. We met you at my sister's yardsale. I have been meaning to email you for a long while now and my mother also. She prints out the newsletters to read on the go and always asks if I've read "this or that" and pulls it out of her bag if I haven't yet. Anyhow we just both want you to know you are appreciated and enjoyed. Thank you. Especially these wonderful Christmas stories - they are so special and heartwarming. Thank you again. ~ Love, Kendra Branum in Virginia

I received your newsletter, after many forwards from others, ending with me. I read and reread it and greatly appreciated the articles and your purpose in having the Newsletter. I would like to be included on your mailing list, please. The articles really hit home and were just what I needed! My sincere thanks to you. (Then on 2/1/07) I cant begin to express how much I have enjoyed the few I have received. My grandchildren and I had great fun and made wonderful memories with the ideas you sent at Christmas. May God continue to bless you as you continue on with His work. ~ Elaine Whiddon in Virginia

May I forward this to my mother back home in Ohio? Is this allowed? Thank you for this gift. It's the best one I've gotten this year. I desire to follow the Lord. God bless you and your home. ~ Laurie White from Ohio, but living happily with her family in Lincolnshire England

A TESTIMONY OF HOW GOD MADE OUR FAMILY'S DREAM COME TRUE

By Hannah Babiak in Wisconsin

Note from Lois: At my request, Hannah allowed me to share her letter with you, as well as the names and ages of the eight Babiak children: Leah (adopted from Liberia) 13; Kaila (biological) 12; Robert (adopted from Liberia) 12; Sarah (adopted from Liberia) 11; Michael (bio) 9; Rachel (bio) 7; Kendra (bio) 5; Jared (bio) 2

Today is the one year anniversary of our new children coming home. It's been an amazing year!

Today we celebrated our "Gotcha Day" except that is not what our children wanted to call it. They named it "Family Day" because they said, "It's the day we were waiting for all our lives - to have a family!" We were all sick with colds and so the day didn't go exactly how we had planned, but God blessed our day tremendously. I had made them all a special pillowcase and painted their names on it and Family Day, We love you and John 14:18 which says, "I will not leave you as orphans." The pillowcases represented that they will now always have a comfortable place to lay their heads. A couple of my children never even had a pillow case before coming to our home and Robert never even had a pillow until he came here. We got the idea from a friend of mine and it was a big hit. They loved it. They laid out their empty pillow cases on the couch Saturday night and on Family Day they woke up to them filled with presents.

The real blessing was a huge surprise. Their tutor (Aunt Jean) had taken Leah shopping to buy a new "Math Book." Well, that wasn't all they bought. They bought stuff for the children to make gifts for me and dad. It was such a surprise. Leah made me an apron and she painted it with the words that said, "Big family meals make BIG mess - that's why I need this Apron." It was so cute!!! She had painted kitchen tools on it also. Leah made dad a picture frame that she painted and put lighthouses on and a picture of her and dad from when dad gave her the purity ring. It was very special. He was very blessed. Sarah made me a beautiful jewelry box that she painted "Sweet Mom" on. Robert made dad a box to keep his stuff in. Kaila shocked us by making us a wonderful scrapbook that said "Our Dream" on the front and then went through our lives together from the time Bob and I got married to having Kaila, then Michael, our miscarried baby Will, then Rachel, then Kendra, our miscarried baby Mia, then Jared, followed by our long distance son, Sylvester and then the arrival of Sarah, Leah and Robert and ended it with a page that said, "Our dream has come true!" It was so special. Nobody has ever made an album for us - I'm always the one that makes them. So it was a real big blessing.

The real tear jerker was a letter that Leah wrote to us:

Dear Mom and Dad,

I love you guys so much. I want to tell you guys that I love you and I am glad to be in this family. I spent 12 years without mother and father. I wanted a mom and dad very bad. I prayed that God would give me a mom and dad one day. One day God answered my prayer by giving me you guys. It was so hard for me to be without a mom and dad. When I was in Liberia, I used to think that God had forgotten me. I was always thinking I would not be able to come to America ever. God helped me to have lots of faith. When I saw a picture of you guys, I knew that God answered my prayer. God worked everything out and I was able to come to this family. I will never forget the first time I met you guys. I was so happy. Nothing else is important to me but God and you both. I know that God is always there for everything we need. We just need to trust in God. I learned a lot of things in this family. You are both so special to me. I love you both and will never forget your love for me. You have given me everything I need. I pray that I will be able to give you something someday. Thank you for loving me all of the time. Love, Leah Faith Babiak

The day was filled with all their favorite foods. Sarah was reminiscing and saying how when she first came here, she hated American food and now she loves it so much that she never wants to live without it again. It was cute! We spent much time watching videos of when they first came home and their lives over the past year. We are amazed at their progress. They have transformed into totally different children than what they were when they first came. Some of it is really miraculous! They have recovered their childhood, they are creative and fun and love to play and imagine now. They didn't know how to do any of that when they came. They've also learned to work as a team and to care for others in the family. We are a real family unit now. There have been many challenges this year. Some were flat out difficult and heart breaking. But through God, we persevered and it has paid off in ways we never could have expected. We are all so blessed! My heart is filled to overflowing at God's goodness toward our family. My children are all inspirations to me and they inspire me day by day.

I wanted to thank you all one more time for your many prayers and support over the last couple of years. God has made us into a new family. We'll never be like we were before and I am so glad about that. I love what we have become. We have all grown in tremendous ways this past year and God has molded us into more of what He wants us to be. We praise Him for His wonderful work in our lives.

A TESTIMONY OF GOD TENDERLY CALMING MY ANXIOUS HEART

By Penny Yonts in Virginia

What a great and glorious year this is going to be! I'm hanging on to Jeremiah 29:11-13 for dear life! 🙂 Lessons for me are super duper hard to learn because I fight God on everything. I pray and I beg God to not let me live a defeated life all the while pulling against Him. I pleaded with God a little over a month ago not to let me live a defeated life, but a victorious life for my sake and my family's sake. As I was driving I was crying and pleading quietly; and God so tenderly calmed my spirit by drawing my attention to His beautiful mountain where the sun was shining so beautifully on part of it and shading the rest - IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! I felt so loved by God at that moment because He saw His child being tormented and He quieted me. "The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; He will save, He will rejoice over thee with joy; He will rest in His love, He will joy over thee with singing.," - Zephaniah 3:17. I love it when God's word becomes real to me. I do that with my children too. When they are just so upset about something I will draw their attention away to something nice.

GOD'S SPECIAL VALENTINE TO YOU

      "For God so loV ed the world,
             That He gA ve
                   His onL y
                   BegottE n
                         SoN
                             T hat whosoever
              Believeth I n Him
                 Should N ot perish,
              But have E verlasting life."
                                           John 3:16

FOURTEEN FUN VALENTINE'S DAY TIPS FOR FEBRUARY 14

Make a natural strawberry-banana ice cream by whirling frozen strawberries and frozen bananas in a blender with milk, a little vanilla flavoring and either honey or stevia powder for sweetness. For a banana spilt, serve with a slice of banana, a fresh strawberry and a sprig of mint on top.

Make heart-shaped garnishes out of fresh sliced strawberries. If the slices don't already look like a heart, trim them a bit with a sharp paring knife. Use to garnish salads, ice cream, cakes.

Make heart-shaped cupcakes by placing a marble between the muffin tin hole and the muffin liner. Fill 2/3 full and bake according to the recipe.

Bake meatloaf in a heart-shaped cake pan or in individual heart-shaped gelatin pans.

Make a heart-shaped pizza crust! Then add all the usual toppings!

Cut sandwich bread with a heart-shaped cookie cutter! But save the trimmings to make croutons with olive oil, butter, herbs and spices.

Make a gelatin mold in a heart-shaped mold, or individual heart-shaped molds. For a healthy version, use unflavored gelatin and follow a recipe on the box, using fruit juices and fruit.

Try a brown rice dish made in a greased heart-shaped mold with pimento for red color.

Make free-form heart pancakes. Serve with whipped cream and strawberries.

If you want to make mashed potatoes with a healthier pink tint than red food coloring, add a bit of pureed red beets. It won't be enough to change the flavor. You can also sneak beets into spaghetti sauce easily. They'll never know!

Make a large heart-shaped cake by baking one round 9 inch layer and one 9 inch square layer. This will take more than one cake mix, so plan on a few cupcakes to freeze too. Cut the round cake in half and fit the two halves to two adjacent sides of the square layer. And there you are! You've got a perfect heart! Frost the cake and place clean silk roses along the top left of the heart. You may want to decorate the edges with a cake decorator as well. But first write "I love you" on the cake or choose one of the following scriptures verses instead. A simple verse on a cake is a good visual lesson for children. Talk about the scripture and memorize it together with your family before you dig in!

Above all else, guard your heart. - Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Draw near with a true heart. - Hebrews 10:22

Love the Lord with all your heart. - Luke 10:27

Blessed are the pure in heart. - Matthew 5:8

I have loved you with an everlasting love. - Jeremiah 31:3

Love is of God. - I John 4:7

Make handmade valentines for family and special friends. Some good ideas, along with pictures, are found at http://www.familycorner.com/homegarden/crafts/valentine_cards.shtml

Hide red felt hearts for your husband to find, as a message of your love for him. Where? In his closet, dresser drawers, car, desk drawer, tucked in his dinner napkin, in his Bible, etc.

Write love notes on paper hearts and hide them for your husband to find - all year long. Tell him why you love him as your husband; remind him of his good character traits and talents; tell him what a good father he is to your children and what a good husband he is to you. These last two tips can certainly be adapted to use with our children and grandchildren as well.

A KNEE-PRINT VALENTINE
By Susanne Scheppmann, Proverbs 31 Speaker Team Member, http://www.susanneonline.com/ - Used by permission

Key verse:
Mark 12:30, "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.'" (NIV)

Devotion:
Lacy white paper glued to bright red paper constructed to enchant others, cutout hearts inviting, "Be Mine Valentine! " and pastel candies with cute phrases provide a sweet conversation between two people. February is the month noted for Love.

However, after searching for just the right valentine card this year, it dawned on me that I can spend more time looking for an endearing phrase for my husband, than I do telling God how much I love Him. Personally, I have never seen a "valentine" card to God. Have you?

This February I will certainly bestow my love on the special people God has placed in my life, but I am also determined to love God "with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength." Why? Because the Apostle John writes this truth, "We love because he first loved us." (I John 4:19, NIV) The only reason I can even begin to love a Holy, Almighty God, is because he loved me by sending His son to die on a tortuous wooden cross, payment for my sin.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16 NIV)

He loved me first. He loved you first. Do you have a love relationship with Jesus Christ? Perhaps, you feel unloved during the month of love, but you don't need to. There are four simple steps to beginning an eternal love relationship with Him.

Believe He is the Son of the Living God.
Believe He died for your sins and was resurrected to eternal life.
Ask for forgiveness of your sins.
Accept Him as Lord of your life.

Whether you have just begun a love relationship with Jesus or if you have journeyed with him for years, why not present Him with an outward display of your love?

My valentine message to Christ will be a special time on my knees. I pray that my creaking knees will be a sound of praise to His ears. The carpet indented with knee-print kisses and elbow-mark hugs on the sofa will be the loving signature of my devotion to Him. (And I will not make my usual list of needy requests.) This knee-print valentine will be just whispers of love, to a God who deserves complete and loving devotion in worship.

My Prayer for today:
Lord Jesus, I thank you for loving me enough to die on the Cross. Lord, I want you to know that I love you. I want to learn to love you more each day. Teach me how to love you with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.

Application steps:
Do you remember making valentines in school? Today take fifteen minutes and make a Valentine's Day card for God. It doesn't have to be beautiful, but it should be heartfelt. Dig out your glue gun, a red crayon, a few pieces of paper, and make a love note to God. Then hang it on your refrigerator as a reminder this week to tell God just how much you love Him.

Reflection points:
Do you know that God wants to be the love of your life?
How can you show God you love Him?
With whom can you share the story of God's love?

Power verses:
Psalm 42:8, "By day the Lord directs his love, at night his song is with me-- a prayer to the God of my life." (NIV)

Psalm 66:19-20, "But God has surely listened and heard my voice in prayer. Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me!" (NIV)

Jeremiah 33:3, " 'Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.' " (NIV)

Zechariah 13:9, "...They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, 'They are my people,' and they will say, 'The Lord is our God.' " (NIV)

ABOUT MARRIAGE
By Donna Kauffman, Editor of E-mail Newsletter, Treasures From My Heart to Yours - [email protected] - http://treasuresbooks.blogspot.com/ - http://treasuresbooks.bravehost.com - Used by permission

I recently found a project to work on concerning marriage. Since I like projects like this anyway, I adapted it for me. And Im thinking about reviewing it twice a year, possibly in February and August. I believe to review these ideas periodically would help build a struggling marriage and further a growing marriage. See what you think.

1. List two ways you can remind your husband of things without nagging or treating him like a child.

2. List some of your habits that annoy your husband and one or two ways you can work at correcting them.

3. List three ways that you complete your husband. This would suggest ways youre his helper.

5. Consider two things you could do to help your husband more.

6. Make a list, as long as possible, of all his good points. Make a decision to warmly and sincerely share at least one word of appreciation with him every day.

7. List two things your husband does that irritates you. And two ideas for each of a wiser way of dealing with the irritations than you do at present.

8. List two areas in which you struggle to show respect to your husband. And two ideas for each one about how you can begin working at displaying a spirit of respect in those areas.

As I typed this up I wondered if it might also work in relating to our children. I think most of the eight points would adapt well to our relationship with them also. I bless you as you find numerous ways during the month of February to extend life and love into the hearts and lives of your husband and children.

THE COST OF CLUTTER
By Jill Cooper - http://www.LivingOnADime.com - Used by permission

We live in a society of extremes. People seem to be extremely in debt, extremely overweight and extremely disorganized. People everywhere are trying to come up with new and better solutions to solve these problems but not many of their ideas are working.

It's because they are focusing on the wrong problem. For example, if your child comes to you and says, "I have a drug problem," you don't sit them down and say, "Well let's work on a way to get your grades up and then we'll work on your drug problem." How foolish that would be. The real problem is not the grades but the drugs. You take care of the drugs and the chances are pretty good that the grades will come up.

For some of us, instead of focusing on getting out of debt or losing weight, we need to first give more serious thought to becoming organized. Does that sound crazy, almost laughable? Before you start laughing too hard, look at these examples and see if you can relate.

How often do you go out to eat because your kitchen is a mess? If your kitchen is clean, chances are you would not only be more willing to fix dinner at home but in the morning you would fix breakfast and pack yourself a lunch too.

Here are some benefits of getting your kitchen organized:

You would save at least $5,000 a year for one person, $10,000 for two, and so on if you ate at home.
When you are organized you know what you have in your pantry, so don't buy ingredients that you already have and you don't throw out food you forgot you have.
You would be using your leftovers instead of tossing them.
You will start losing weight because you are preparing regular well balanced meals instead of eating fast food all the time. Besides the fact that homemade food generally has fewer calories than fast food, balanced meals create fewer cravings and this helps eliminate grazing.

Organizing can reduce your wardrobe and laundry costs.

Do you keep buying more clothes because you are gaining weight from fast food or from the stress of your clutter?
How big is your wardrobe? Do you or your children own 30 pairs of jeans at $60 a pop because you don't keep up with the laundry or because your closet is so stuffed you can't find anything? That adds up to $1,800 worth of jeans. If you cut it down to even 10 pairs you would save $1,200. How many tops do you own? How about those shoes? Before you say, "There is no way I have that many jeans, shoes, or tops!" go count you clothes. You may be surprised...
How often do you toss a suit jacket on the floor or on the furniture and then later have to have it dry cleaned because it's wrinkled? Just think what you could save on your dry cleaning bill if you keep a little more organized.

Organizing can save you money in every aspect of your life.

Do you buy new items because you can't find something? The cost of things like tools, glue, tape, ropes, garden tools, kitchen items, light bulbs, batteries, office supplies and other things really adds up.
How much do you pay each month in late fees on your bills because you can't find them, your checkbook or even a stamp to mail them?

Try something different!

So often we think that the solution to our debt problem is for both spouses to work outside the home. At times we even compound the problem when one or both spouses takes a second job. When both spouses work out of the home, who takes care of the house? Frequently, there is a constant battle between them about whose job it is to take care of some element of the housework. After all, the husband has been out working all day, so he doesn't feel like it. Oh, but the wife has been working, too so why can't she take a break?

Imagine if your boss at work decided to work a second full time job. How would this impact your work place? Who would you ask if you couldn't find products for your customers? What if there was no change because your boss was at his other job until after the bank closed? What if you needed help or advice from your boss, but he said, "Not now... I'm too tired from my other job?" How long would that company last? The same thing happens in many homes every day.

Would your family be better served if one spouse stayed home? Someone needs to be responsible for the bulk of the care and maintenance of the home and family. Ideally, everyone will share the work, but like in any other business there has to be one person in charge. Otherwise, everyone will avoid the work and everything will descend into chaos.

If this sounds like your home, you might sit down with your spouse and seriously consider whether one of you might take off of work to try to get your home in order. Instead of thinking of staying at home as a prison sentence, think of it as another job to help save you money, reduce family stress and add more family comfort.

If you're considering staying home, get rid of the emotions and, with pen and paper (hopefully you can find one) in hand, write down the ways that being disorganized is costing you money. Be honest and try to cover even the small things. You might find that the money you are spending dealing with disorganization is equal to or more than one spouse's take home pay. Organization has nothing to do with what is politically correct or what the media or other people tell you that you need to do. It is a practical choice that you can make. I am NOT saying that you can't work doing something that you love. I am saying that regardless of how your family handles it, the work of keeping the home has to get done.

If you feel that you and your spouse have to or both want to work, then try to come up with other ideas.

Would spending your vacation organizing things and deep cleaning give you enough of a jump start to help keep things organized? Maybe once you organized everything you could consider hiring someone to clean your house once a week. Before you say you can't afford it, think about this-- Which would cost less? -- Paying someone $50 a week to clean your house or paying for all the things that cost you money because you are not organized?
Consider whether it would be worth one spouse working part time instead of full time.
Try one simple thing like hanging up your clothes so you don't have cleaners expense or getting the whole family to pitch in with cleaning the kitchen at the end of each meal.

Maybe you do have the time, but you just don't know how to get organized. If that is the case, then learn. Check out books at the library or search for help on the Internet. Better yet, find someone you know who is organized and ask them to teach you. Don't be embarrassed to do this. Most people are more than willing to show you how to do things. Remember, those older women (and men) that seem to have it all together now didn't start out that way. They've had 20 years or more practice and they remember what it was like to not have a clue where to start. Just ask.

Instead of wasting your time and energy on trying to bail the water out of your sinking boat by bailing faster or using a bigger bucket, fix the hole. CLEAN UP THE CLUTTER AND SAVE.

NUTS AND BOLTS ~ A SORTING GAME FOR CHILDREN

While playing this game, be sure your young child is being watched carefully by an adult or older child, so none of these items is swallowed, and beans don't end up being stuck in little ears and noses!

You will need a box (about the size of a stationery box) an egg carton for 18 eggs, four to five each of eighteen different small items. Items could be from your home workshop or the hardware store: 1/2-inch screws, 1-inch screws, 1 1/2-inch screws, small nuts, larger nuts, small bolts, larger bolts, small metal washers, medium metal washers, large metal washers, plastic washers and rubber washers, , etc.

How to play the game: Fill the box with all the objects. The object of the game is for the child to sort the objects into the 18 compartments of the egg carton.

Variation of Items: Use small items found around the house such as rubberbands, small paper clips, large paper clips, toothpicks, several varieties of buttons, safety pins, cut up plastic straws, beads, dried beans (different varieties), etc. Let the children help find items for the game. After your children master this game, let them help you sort through your clutter!

CLUTTER, CLUTTER, TOIL AND TROUBLE
By Kayla Fay, Editor of E-mail Newsletter, An Ounce of Ketchup - A great resource for moms of children with ADHD, or any mom, for that matter! http://www.goaskmom.com - Used by permission

There are several great online products to help you de-clutter and organize your stuff. My favorite resource is Fly Lady. She'll nag via email, and help you organize your life step by step - with no charge! If you're looking for a more immediate solution, try Clear Your Clutter, Clear Your Mind. Personal Organization Made Easy. I really like DeClutter Fast - Get Your Home In
Order!. It's a quick read, and offers an 'off the beaten path' approach to de-cluttering.

ORGANIZE YOUR DOCUMENTS
By Kayla Fay - http://www.goaskmom.com - Used by permission

Is your computer organized? Create folders for each person in your family, and a folder for each type of work you do (school, volunteer, financial, business, etc.) If you've never learned how to create folders so your files can be more easily found, here's how:

1. Go to 'My Documents' and open it.

2. Right click over a blank spot, go to "New" then "Folder". Backspace, and type in the name of your New Folder.

3. Drag the files from My Documents into the appropriate folder.

4. Teach your kids to do this. (They may already know how, and can teach you!)

CHOOSING TO PLAY THE ACCORDIAN - HOW TO ORGANIZE HOMEWORK
See more tips by Kayla Fay: http://www.goaskmom.com/that_works_adhd_inattentive/organize.html

Ben is in the sixth grade, and has classic disorganization problems. This semester, one of his teachers talked to Ben about why his grades were so low. He told her that he understood the work, and usually did it, but then he couldn't find it or forgot to turn it in. (Sound familiar?) This wise teacher then asked Ben to devise his own way to keep organized, and Ben chose to keep all his homework in an accordion folder. To his mother's joy and relief, Ben's grades have come up, mainly because his work is getting turned in. Letting Ben create his own strategy gave him ownership of the plan. He also had some insight into what would work and what wouldn't work for him.

ANOTHER CHORE / AWARD CHART IDEA - A NICE TIME SAVER

Thanks to Joanna (Joey) Claycomb in Virginia for this great tip!

When I read about your chore chart and award chart, I immediately thought of one that my sister uses. It has instructions, a reward system, etc., and it has worked very well for my sister and another friend of mine. While I know some ladies would want to make their own, I think a few may find this one a nice time-saver. Just a thought. Here is the link . . . http://www.onlineorganizing.com/ProductsPage.asp?name=I_Did_My_Chores

SOME KIDS ARE JUST CHALLENGING

Parents sometimes feel that because their child is a challenge that they, as parents, are the problem. "If I would just do the right things then I wouldn't have this problem with my kids," they say. Of course, we, as parents can have a lot of influence on our kids, but it's certainly not the whole story.

Children aren't robots; they're people, and have a will of their own. You can influence but not control them. That's why parents must be praying for their kids often. God uses you, as a parent, to mold your kids. As you work on the heart of your child you will benefit by developing a character development plan uniquely tailored for each child.

Heres an idea: Fold a piece of paper to make three columns. In column one, list unwanted behaviors you see in your child. In many cases this is a long list but that's okay. Putting the problem on paper often helps sort it out. In the second column try to group the behaviors into character issues. We find that challenging children often lack qualities like self control, sensitivity, perseverance, and gentleness, just to name a few.

In the third column identify positive character qualities as headings and then specific behaviors you'd like to see to replace those unwanted behaviors. Taking this information, develop a strategy to motivate your child to make small changes.

Whatever you do, don't show the paper to your child. That's too much for any one person to see. Choose one character quality to work on and look for positive ways to correct as well as proactive ways to teach the new character quality.

You'll be surprised at the small steps of progress you'll see. But it's those steps of progress that will encourage you and your child. After all, in many homes children are making small steps of progress in the wrong direction so turning things around is a tremendous blessing.

If you'd like help developing an Action Plan for your child, consider a Phone Coaching Session with Dr. Scott Turansky. More details are available at http://www.effectiveparenting.org. Or learn more about this six-step character development plan in our book, "Home Improvement." To reach us via email: p[email protected].

SPECIAL QUOTES

A crushing hurt comes to our heart and the sympathizing, scarred hand of Christ presses the wound; and just for a moment,the pain seems to intensify,...but finally the bleeding stops. -- Beth Moore

Perhaps God brings us to the end of our resources so we can discover the vastness of His. -- Neil Anderson

Victory is the place where our breaking point becomes our turning point. -- L. Burt

Many Heart to Heart ladies and their families need our prayers, so

please remember to pray for each Heart to Heart lady as you receive your newsletter.

(¨`·.·´¨) God bless you and your family and keep you in His loving care!

`·.¸(¨`·.·´¨) And remember, I love to hear from you dear ladies!

`·.¸.·´ Your Heart to Heart friend,

Lois

The purpose of the Heart to Heart Newsletter is to encourage women and build biblical values into daily living through practical creative ideas for the Christian family regarding marriage, children, homemaking, and much more. Receive this free bimonthly newsletter by sending your name, city, state, e-mail address, and name of your referral person to Lois at [email protected]. New subscribers will receive a "Start-Up Kit."

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