Doc's Daily Chuckle 11/14/14
Quote from Forum Archives on November 14, 2014, 4:06 pmPosted by: drpkaine <drpkaine@...>
DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE
Always Clean Chuckles
Laughter is the Best Medicine!
________________________________________
Please feel welcome to forward this email to your
friends, inviting them to become a member of the
Doc's Daily Chuckle family!
If you got this from a friend and would like your own
copy sent to you regularly, please sign up at
________________________________________
I've got a cough and no voice. Tea, orange juice and sleep
are my staples today.
Doc
Today's Chuckles
1.
2. Senior Brains
------------------------------
Sales with Scripture
The owner of an old-fashioned corner grocery store in
a small country town was fond of quoting a scripture
after each sale.
He had three old friends that would sit around a
potbellied stove, playing checkers on a faded board.
His ability to produce a scripture for all occasions
never ceased to amuse the old timers, and they would
listen to see what verse he would come up with relevant
to the sale made.
A lady purchased some material and he said, "She seeketh
wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands."
A man bought a sack of flour; he said "Man does not live
by bread alone, but every word that proceedeth out of the
mouth of God."
A little boy bought some candy and as he rung it up he
quoted, "Suffer the little children to come unto Me."
It was nearly closing time when the chimes over the door
jangled loudly. A well dressed young man, obviously a
stranger from one of the larger towns down the road,
entered.
"Help you?" offered the proprietor.
"I need a blanket for my horse," said the man. "He's out
in his trailer and it's too cold for just one. Bring me
the nicest one you've got!"
The store owner went in the back store room and came back
with a brown blanket. "That'll be five dollars."
"Five dollars? You've got to be kidding!' said the man.
"This horse is a thoroughbred. He gets only the best! He
wouldn't stand still for an old five dollar blanket."
Without comment, the store owner took back the blanket,
then merely selected a different color and brought it out.
"This one's $25 dollars."
"Now, look," said the young man. "Perhaps I didn't make
myself plain. This isn't just any old horse! He's worth
thousands! Now I want the best, most expensive blanket
you've got! Comprende?"
The owner once more went into the store room, pulled out
another color of the same material and brought it back.
"This is the only one left, and it's $100."
"Now that's more like it!" enthused the fellow as he paid.
Throwing the five dollar blanket over his shoulder, he left.
The old timers stared silently at the shopkeeper as they
waited to see what possible scripture he could come up with
for that sale!
Going behind the register, he rang up the hundred dollars and
said, "He was a stranger, and I took him in.”
- from Monday Fodder
------------------------------
In the end, just three things matter: how well we
have lived; how well we have loved; how well we
have learned to let go. - Jack Kornfield
------------------------------
Senior Brains
WOW! Finally, a rational explanation for
Seniors...
Brains of older people are slow because they
know so much. People do not decline mentally
with age, it just takes them longer to recall
facts because they have more information stored
in their brains, scientists believe. Much like
a computer struggles as the hard drive becomes
fuller, so humans also take longer to access
information, it has been suggested.
Researchers say this slowing down is not the
same as cognitive decline. The human brain
works slower in old age, said Dr. Michael
Ramscar, but only because we have stored more
information over time. The brains of older
people do not get weak. On the contrary, they
simply know more, but just may not be able to
access the information as quickly.
Also, older people often go to another room
to get something and when they get there, they
stand there wondering what they came for. It
is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of
making older people get more exercise.
SO THERE!! Now I understand.....what a
relief!!!!!!!!!!!
- from Ann F.
--------
Please pray for: Rose, Eileen, Jean, Eric, Joanne, Beth, Melissa.
=================
Have a TERRIFIC day!
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Posted by: drpkaine <drpkaine@...>
DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE
Always Clean Chuckles
Laughter is the Best Medicine!
________________________________________
Please feel welcome to forward this email to your
friends, inviting them to become a member of the
Doc's Daily Chuckle family!
If you got this from a friend and would like your own
copy sent to you regularly, please sign up at
________________________________________
I've got a cough and no voice. Tea, orange juice and sleep
are my staples today.
Doc
Today's Chuckles
1.
2. Senior Brains
------------------------------
Sales with Scripture
The owner of an old-fashioned corner grocery store in
a small country town was fond of quoting a scripture
after each sale.
He had three old friends that would sit around a
potbellied stove, playing checkers on a faded board.
His ability to produce a scripture for all occasions
never ceased to amuse the old timers, and they would
listen to see what verse he would come up with relevant
to the sale made.
A lady purchased some material and he said, "She seeketh
wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands."
A man bought a sack of flour; he said "Man does not live
by bread alone, but every word that proceedeth out of the
mouth of God."
A little boy bought some candy and as he rung it up he
quoted, "Suffer the little children to come unto Me."
It was nearly closing time when the chimes over the door
jangled loudly. A well dressed young man, obviously a
stranger from one of the larger towns down the road,
entered.
"Help you?" offered the proprietor.
"I need a blanket for my horse," said the man. "He's out
in his trailer and it's too cold for just one. Bring me
the nicest one you've got!"
The store owner went in the back store room and came back
with a brown blanket. "That'll be five dollars."
"Five dollars? You've got to be kidding!' said the man.
"This horse is a thoroughbred. He gets only the best! He
wouldn't stand still for an old five dollar blanket."
Without comment, the store owner took back the blanket,
then merely selected a different color and brought it out.
"This one's $25 dollars."
"Now, look," said the young man. "Perhaps I didn't make
myself plain. This isn't just any old horse! He's worth
thousands! Now I want the best, most expensive blanket
you've got! Comprende?"
The owner once more went into the store room, pulled out
another color of the same material and brought it back.
"This is the only one left, and it's $100."
"Now that's more like it!" enthused the fellow as he paid.
Throwing the five dollar blanket over his shoulder, he left.
The old timers stared silently at the shopkeeper as they
waited to see what possible scripture he could come up with
for that sale!
Going behind the register, he rang up the hundred dollars and
said, "He was a stranger, and I took him in.”
- from Monday Fodder
------------------------------
In the end, just three things matter: how well we
have lived; how well we have loved; how well we
have learned to let go. - Jack Kornfield
------------------------------
Senior Brains
WOW! Finally, a rational explanation for
Seniors...
Brains of older people are slow because they
know so much. People do not decline mentally
with age, it just takes them longer to recall
facts because they have more information stored
in their brains, scientists believe. Much like
a computer struggles as the hard drive becomes
fuller, so humans also take longer to access
information, it has been suggested.
Researchers say this slowing down is not the
same as cognitive decline. The human brain
works slower in old age, said Dr. Michael
Ramscar, but only because we have stored more
information over time. The brains of older
people do not get weak. On the contrary, they
simply know more, but just may not be able to
access the information as quickly.
Also, older people often go to another room
to get something and when they get there, they
stand there wondering what they came for. It
is NOT a memory problem, it is nature's way of
making older people get more exercise.
SO THERE!! Now I understand.....what a
relief!!!!!!!!!!!
- from Ann F.
--------
Please pray for: Rose, Eileen, Jean, Eric, Joanne, Beth, Melissa.
=================
Have a TERRIFIC day!
If you need to leave, do so at: [email protected]
If you need to change your address, send the old address to the leave
address and the new address to the join e-mail at the top.
To unsubscribe, e-mail: [email protected]
For additional commands, e-mail: [email protected]