Doc's Daily Chuckle 3/11/15
Quote from Forum Archives on March 11, 2015, 1:13 amPosted by: pkaine <pkaine@...>
DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE
Always Clean Chuckles
Laughter is the Best Medicine!
________________________________________
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friends, inviting them to become a member of the
Doc's Daily Chuckle family!
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I appreciate the prayers said for the people listed.
God hears, cares and answers.
Doc
Today's Chuckles
1. Life Without Email...
2. Wrinkle Cream
------------------------------
Life Without Email...
An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft
as a janitor. The manager there arranges for him to take
an aptitude test (Section: Floors, sweeping and cleaning).
After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed
at minimum wage, $5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail
address, so that I can send you a form to complete and
tell you where to report for work on your first day."
Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a
computer nor an e-mail address. To this the Microsoft
manager replies, "Well then, that means that you virtually
don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be employed."
Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and
having only $10 in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 LB
flat of tomatoes at the supermarket.
Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes
individually at 100% profit. Repeating the process several
times more that day,he ends up with almost $100 before
going to sleep that night.
And thus it dawns on him that he could quite easily make
a living selling tomatoes. Getting up early every day and
going to bed late, he multiplies his profits quickly.
After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several
dozen boxes of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again
so that he can buy a pickup truck to support his expanding
business. By the end of the second year, he is the owner of
a fleet of pickup trucks and manages a staff of a hundred
former unemployed people, all selling tomatoes.
Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides
to buy some life insurance. Consulting with an insurance
adviser, he picks an insurance plan to fit his new circum-
stances. At the end of the telephone conversation, the adviser
asks him for his e-mail address in order to send the final
documents electronically.
When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is
stunned, "What! You don't have e-mail? How on earth have
you managed to amass such wealth without the Internet,
e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine where you would be now,
if only you had been connected to the Internet from the very
start!"
After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied,
"Why, of course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"
- from ArcaMax Jokes
------------------------------
It's not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel
and heartless world. It's our job to raise children who will
make the world a little less cruel and heartless. ― L.R. Knost
------------------------------
Wrinkle Cream
My nine-year-old daughter walked in while I was getting
ready for work.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Putting on my wrinkle cream," I answered.
"Oh" she said, walking away. "I thought they were natural."
- from Da Mouse Tracks
--------
Please pray for: Jacob, Christine, Ruth, Francis, B., Ann, Mary, John.
=================
Have a TERRIFIC day!
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If you need to change your address, send the old address to the leave
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Posted by: pkaine <pkaine@...>
DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE
Always Clean Chuckles
Laughter is the Best Medicine!
________________________________________
Please feel welcome to forward this email to your
friends, inviting them to become a member of the
Doc's Daily Chuckle family!
If you got this from a friend and would like your own
copy sent to you regularly, please sign up at
________________________________________
I appreciate the prayers said for the people listed.
God hears, cares and answers.
Doc
Today's Chuckles
1. Life Without Email...
2. Wrinkle Cream
------------------------------
Life Without Email...
An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft
as a janitor. The manager there arranges for him to take
an aptitude test (Section: Floors, sweeping and cleaning).
After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed
at minimum wage, $5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail
address, so that I can send you a form to complete and
tell you where to report for work on your first day."
Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a
computer nor an e-mail address. To this the Microsoft
manager replies, "Well then, that means that you virtually
don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be employed."
Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and
having only $10 in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 LB
flat of tomatoes at the supermarket.
Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes
individually at 100% profit. Repeating the process several
times more that day,he ends up with almost $100 before
going to sleep that night.
And thus it dawns on him that he could quite easily make
a living selling tomatoes. Getting up early every day and
going to bed late, he multiplies his profits quickly.
After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several
dozen boxes of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again
so that he can buy a pickup truck to support his expanding
business. By the end of the second year, he is the owner of
a fleet of pickup trucks and manages a staff of a hundred
former unemployed people, all selling tomatoes.
Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides
to buy some life insurance. Consulting with an insurance
adviser, he picks an insurance plan to fit his new circum-
stances. At the end of the telephone conversation, the adviser
asks him for his e-mail address in order to send the final
documents electronically.
When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is
stunned, "What! You don't have e-mail? How on earth have
you managed to amass such wealth without the Internet,
e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine where you would be now,
if only you had been connected to the Internet from the very
start!"
After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied,
"Why, of course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"
- from ArcaMax Jokes
------------------------------
It's not our job to toughen our children up to face a cruel
and heartless world. It's our job to raise children who will
make the world a little less cruel and heartless. ― L.R. Knost
------------------------------
Wrinkle Cream
My nine-year-old daughter walked in while I was getting
ready for work.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Putting on my wrinkle cream," I answered.
"Oh" she said, walking away. "I thought they were natural."
- from Da Mouse Tracks
--------
Please pray for: Jacob, Christine, Ruth, Francis, B., Ann, Mary, John.
=================
Have a TERRIFIC day!
If you need to leave, do so at: [email protected]
If you need to change your address, send the old address to the leave
address and the new address to the join e-mail at the top.
To unsubscribe, e-mail: [email protected]
For additional commands, e-mail: [email protected]