DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE 6/6/14
Posted by: pkaine <pkaine@...>
DOC'S DAILY CHUCKLE
Always Clean Chuckles
Laughter is the Best Medicine!
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From Archie. I recommend his uplifting e-mail.
Doc
Today's Chuckles
1. Top 7 Signs Your Preacher Needs A Vacation
2. Some Ways To Order Pizza Over The Phone
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Top 7 Signs Your Preacher Needs A Vacation
7. You caught him snoring during the service while he was leading
the congregational prayer.
6. The last ten sermons had the word "rest" in the title!
5. The closing hymn for the last three weeks has been, "I'll Fly
Away"!
4. At last weekend's service he showed up in a Hawaiian shirt and
Bermuda shorts!
3. Before the last board meeting, holiday brochures of exotic
getaways were placed on each seat!
2. The preacher's wife has posted a picture of him with the caption:
"Have You Seen This Man?" all over the neighborhood!
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOUR PREACHER NEEDS A VACATION
1. The theme of his Jonah sermon was -- "A Change Of Scenery Does
A Body Good!"
- from Laugh & Lift
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Archie, who has become my right hand man,regularly
sends an uplifting e-mail. You would just need to cut-and-paste the url.
http://www.spiritisup.com/hewilltakeyourcaresbh.html
He also now sends out gospel music 5 days a week plus
takes requests. Just send an email to the e-mail address
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There is more in us than we know. If we can be made to see it,
perhaps, for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to
settle for less. - Kurt Hahn
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Some Ways To Order Pizza Over The Phone
Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and
you're going with the lowest bidder.
Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.
Tell them to put the crust on top this time.
Put an extra edge in your voice when you say "crazy bread."
Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (If phoning Domino's,
ask for a CheeserCheeser!)
Change your accent every three seconds.
Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave
a sigh of relief.
Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact,
dead.
When they say "What would you like?" say, "Huh? Oh, you mean now."
Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.
Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say "Where
was I? Who are you?"
Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
Start the conversation with "My Call to (Pizza Place), Take 1,
and... action!"
Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.
Order a one-inch pizza.
If he/she suggests a side order, ask why he/she is punishing you.
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Please pray for: Elwyn, Debbie, Evan, Walter, Ruth Ann, Glen, Bob, Cathie.
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