GREAT TRUTHS
Quote from Forum Archives on November 3, 1999, 11:49 amPosted by: clean-hewmor <clean-hewmor@...>
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:* Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
* There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to
look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is
that wrinkles don't hurt.
* Reason to smile: Every seven minutes of everyday, someone in
an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
* The best way to keep kids at home is to make the home a
pleasant atmosphere ... and let the air out of their tires.
* Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly car
payment is due.
* Families are like fudge .. mostly sweet with a few nuts.
* Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
* Laughing helps. It's like jogging on the inside.
* Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not
the toy.
* My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.
* The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
* One day I shall burst my buds of calm and blossom into
hysteria.
* If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
* Eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse
can happen to you the rest of the day!
* You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and
wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
* Life's golden age is when the kids are too old to need
baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car.
Posted by: clean-hewmor <clean-hewmor@...>
* Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
* There is always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to
look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is
that wrinkles don't hurt.
* Reason to smile: Every seven minutes of everyday, someone in
an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
* The best way to keep kids at home is to make the home a
pleasant atmosphere ... and let the air out of their tires.
* Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly car
payment is due.
* Families are like fudge .. mostly sweet with a few nuts.
* Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
* Laughing helps. It's like jogging on the inside.
* Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not
the toy.
* My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely.
* The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
* One day I shall burst my buds of calm and blossom into
hysteria.
* If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.
* Eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse
can happen to you the rest of the day!
* You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and
wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
* Life's golden age is when the kids are too old to need
baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car.