Quote from Forum Archives on October 17, 2001, 6:15 pm

Posted by: pat <pat@...>

well, even trying to discuss it with people who hold that belief is
difficult. I do not say that something is right or wrong. Yes, I was wrong
but still, God forgives. The issue is not wether it is a sin to divorce or
a sin to divorce and remarry. I think the issue comes down to wether God is
able to forgive. The God I believe in is capable of lifting me out of the mud.

I do know that I did all the Bible Studies and the Mennonites even sent me
tapes. One of the tapes contained a sermon that a wife should submit to
her husband even if he was beating her, because that was God's will for
her. I don't believe that. I know I felt heart broke that I couldn't stay.
But then I got the overwhelming feeling that I would be putting my light
under a basket if I stayed. I could not have worked because I had little
children. At the time I only had two children so there really wasn't that
much work around the house that I could do to keep busy. I would have
existed off the donations of the congregation. I was only 24 at the time
and could not envision that many years of being alone. I am with Paul on
that issue, it is better to marry than to burn.

The other thing the situation of no forgiveness when it comes to marriage
leads to is the idea that "its OK to live with someone, cause God can
forgive that" instead of making a commitment to marriage. I don't think
peer pressure is what should be holding our marriages together. I think our
marriages should be stuck together because as couples we have our eyes on
the Lord and seek to do His will.

I met many people I respected and really liked when i was seeking the
Mennonite way. I do know they are just as mired in traditions of men as
anyone other group is. I also know that their peer pressure is almost
"cult-like". What appears to be simple on the outside can be incredibly
complex underneath. I also know that some people do join from the
"english" but that they last for 10 years or so and eventually quit. IT is
such a cultural group that it is hard to ever truly feel accepted.

A truth that I discovered long ago:
Satan can use our desire to serve Christ as a snare to distract us from
what God would have for us. Sometimes we think our service to the Lord
must be terrible and costly. So we look for ways that we think we must
make this sacrifice to serve him. It does us no good to "give up the world"
if we "loose our own soul". No matter what the sacrifice, if it is NOT
God's will for US, then it is just wood, hay and stubble.

Often His will is in the little things and those things are not all bad.
Often His will is found in the mess we make and that He lifts us out
of. God can use welfare payments to care for us. God can use the public
school when we have no choice but to send our kids there. God uses parents,
the most confused bunch of people around to make wonderful followers for
Him. God is not restrained by our abilities or actions. He is mighty and
loves us so much that He sent His Son to die for us.

I'll now get off my soapbox. I guess I am just grateful that God has given
me peace about the issue.

Pat ( in Oklahoma)