Quote from Forum Archives on April 29, 2001, 11:46 pm

Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>

'Standing Shoulder To Shoulder With You In The Trenches
As We fight The Good Fight In This New Millennium

SHOULDER TO SHOULDER #

Title: "Fightings And Fears . . . Within"
(part 2 ---- "Irresponsible Conduct")

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Dear Friend in the Lord:

III John 2, one of my ten most favorite scriptures, is my prayer for you
today ---- " . . . I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in
good health, just as your soul prospers." May it be so for you this
week.

There's really more to that verse than just a brother's wish, but there
is also a dynamic spiritual principle we often overlook. Simply put, it
is God's desire that you prosper and be in good health in every aspect of
your life, BUT that type of prospering comes from a direct link as to how
you are prospering in your soul.

So ---- what I wish for you is that, because your soul is prospering in
abundance today, you will also subsequently prosper in every other area
of your life. When "it is well with [your] soul", it will also be well
everywhere else.

GRAND KIDS:

You may recall that Jo Ann and I are the proud grandparents of eleven
fantastic grand children, five of whom are adopted from Russia. Well,
those five home-schooled gems are spending two weeks with us ---- it is
indeed a fascinating experience. You have two "compliant ones", one "big
brother", one "mother", and one all-knowing "dad". (I just overheard the
"dad" accuse one of the "compliant ones" that he was wearing his
underwear instead of his own.)

In that some readers know these five "little rascals", I'll identify no
further, except to say that Jo Ann and I love them all and, through the
dust and the noise, we can still locate our sanity and remind ourselves
that we're the ones that said "yes" to having them all come at once ----
for a two-week stay!

In all seriousness, we wouldn't trade this moment for another ---- at
least that's the way I feel right now, little more than half way through
the first week.

When you consider the backgrounds from which these special children each
came, it is a constant occasion of amazement that each of them has come
to know Jesus Christ as personal Savior since having come to America.
It's such a blessing to hear them pray ---- and to just be around them.
Quite frankly, they are more well mannered and well behaved than most
kids we meet who were born and raised in America.

THE BIRD:

Katja, one of the two girls, brought her own special pet along ---- a
parakeet names "Sasha". She's a gorgeous white with a few flecks of blue
scattered around her head. In all aspects, she's a beautiful bird . . .
. except for one thing.

Sasha is paraplegic ---- she cannot stand or walk.

She wasn't always that way. There was a time early on when she was a
perfectly healthy bird; she could fly, sing, perch, hop, . . . .
everything birds do.

Now, though, all she does is chirp occasionally, lie on her back or side,
periodically flail her legs . . . . and bite.

God has used Sasha to remind me of some people I know in ministry. The
same thing that caused Sasha's demise is that which has caused the
crippling of ministry in others. Simply put, Sasha is a paraplegic
because of . . . .

Irresponsible Conduct.

We are not certain just what happened. All we know is that Sasha was a
lively parakeet living in a well groomed cage, with frequent
opportunities to fly around the house and enjoy interacting with the
children.

WHAT WAS THE CAUSE:

Before the mysterious accident, Sasha did more than lie on her back; she
stood upright and erect on her perch or on a lampshade. She hopped
around the floor of her cage or on the top of the dining room table. She
flew from perch to perch, from curtain rod to cabinet top, from light
fixture to bed post.

She chirped often, but she also sang . . . . beautiful parakeet songs.
She used to sit on someone's finger or on a shoulder nuzzling under a
nearby ear. She would talk and jabber to everyone's delight, and break
out in little scoldings if things were not to her liking.

What caused this unknown accident in Sasha's life?

Apparently nobody knows. The veterinarian indicated that it was most
certainly some type of blow to the head that either damaged the brain or
the spinal column around the neck or back.

Though there are several theories and opinions, just how that blow
occurred remains a mystery.

It could have been self-inflicted ---- or it could have come at the hand
of another. Sasha could have been enjoying high flight so much that she
didn't pay attention and flew into a wall, a door, or another object.

It could be she flew into a window, thinking it was a passage way into
another scenario of beauty or exploration. We have many birds around our
home, and rarely a week goes by but what we don't hear a bird hit one of
the windows in our family room. Mistaken identity or understanding can
sometimes do that.

On the other hand, the injury may have come from someone else, such as a
grand child, a parent, an animal, or a visiting friend. It was most
certainly unintentional, if that is what happened. It could have
happened as a result of a sincere attempt to capture the bird and put her
back in the cage. it could have been caused by playful antics toward a
bird in flight. It could have even come from an angry or frustrated
individual fed up with the mischievous little bird's nibbling on an ear
or biting a finger tip.

Whatever the cause, it was certainly irresponsible conduct.

Irresponsible conduct takes its toll on people in ministry as well.
Sometimes it, too, is self inflicted. Other times it comes from the hand
of another ---- sometimes intentional, and sometimes unintentional.
Sometimes, because we are blinded by the scenes around us, we go full
steam into a wall. Other times we think there is an opportunity just
ahead suddenly to discover the hard way that God's invisible hand brought
us to an abrupt collision with His will. Still on other occasions it is
the words or actions of someone trying to undermine our ministry.

Sometimes it's us, and sometimes it's others. But, at the point of such
conduct, "who" and "what" no longer become particularly important. Now
it's a matter of what can be done.

WHAT DID IT COST:

Whatever the cause of Sasha's tragic injury that ended in immobility, the
cost of such action was heavy.

It first caused the loss of her grip. She can no longer get a firm grasp
on her perch. I watched several of the children wrap her little claws
around their fingers with the hope that she could grab hold and right
herself, but she cannot. She just falls off, wings fluttering, and
loudly fussing.

It also cost her a proper perspective and viewpoint. Parakeets aren't
supposed to view life from upside down or sidewise. Things look
differently there. However, there's really nothing she can do herself
about how she views the world around her. The only time she sees things
right side up is if Katja or one of the other children hold her in their
hands.

It also cost her mobility. Having regained some activity in her little
twig sized legs, the best they can do now is uncontrollably flail around.
If she happens to be in the right position on her side or belly, she can
slowly scoot from one part of her cage to another, but only more by
accident than intent.

Most of the time, though, she's confined to the bottom of the cage.

Then, this "accident", whatever it was, cost her her song. Whether she
no longer remembers how to sing . . . . or that she was created to sing .
. . . or even that she's a parakeet, . . . . the song is gone. Her
message of joy has been silenced, perhaps forever.

It also cost Sasha her purpose ---- to be a parakeet and bring beauty and
joy to the world around her. Her condition, however, does just the
opposite. When people see her, they are seldom filled with joy; they
rarely see her as beautiful, and their ears are filled with squawks
rather than beautiful warbling.

Finally, I believe it may have cost Sasha a sense of contented peace and
wholeness. I certainly don't know parakeet thoughts (or if they even
have thoughts), but, if she does have any awareness in her little brain
of what her circumstances are, I suspect there has to be some sense of
frustration, and a great hole that is void of peaceful contentment.

Irresponsible conduct was costly to Sasha.

One other thing this tragedy cost Sasha ---- it cost her the ability to
fly . . . . to flit . . . . . to soar. Now that Sasha is a paraplegic,
she must be constantly under the care of others. In order to make
certain she is available, it was necessary to clip the feathers on her
wings so that she can no longer be free to fly somewhere beyond the reach
and loving capture of her master.

She can flutter short distances, but the days of free flight are over.
If her wings had not been clipped, she might not only have flown beyond
the care of the master's love, but she might also have hurt herself even
more seriously by being unable to land properly; the force of adventure
could be fatal.

Paul was acutely aware of the consequences of irresponsible conduct. In
fact, it appears that he had one driving and haunting fear that was
constantly before him ---- that he would never do anything to disqualify
himself from serving the Lord Jesus Christ and, therefore, become a
castaway . . . . someone God could no longer use.

Gratefully, Paul never came to that tragic end, though others of whom he
wrote did. I've often wondered what type of ministry Hymenaeus,
Alexander, (I Tim 1:20) and others might have had if they had not acted
irresponsibly. The Bible is filled with people, both Old and New
Testament characters, who fell under the weight of irresponsible conduct.

Have you ever been guilty of irresponsible conduct? Did you notice that
you no longer soared with the eagles after it happened? Did you feel the
sense of mundaneness and sameness set in?

Yes, the cost of irresponsible conduct is high.

WHAT IS THE CURE:

That's the real question at this point. The veterinarian was very
noncommittal at this point regarding little Sasha . . . . just not very
sure. Even though she has actually regained some movement in her legs
(at first there was no movement at all; now there is uncontrolled
flailing), there are no guarantees that she will ever get better, or that
she will even survive for any length of time.

There seems to be some hope that whatever nerve or brain damage that was
done may not be permanent. The likelihood of that happening, however, is
not very promising.

So . . . . . in Sasha's case, a possible cure is basically beyond hope.
The veterinarian even suggested putting her to sleep in order to end the
incapacitating misery.

The question still haunts us, however . . . . particularly as we see the
similarities between this crippled little parakeet, life forever changed
by some probably unintended but nonetheless irresponsible act, and the
lives of acquaintances in ministry who have also been possibly derailed
by a similar form of conduct.

Perhaps you can remember names of prominent preachers and others in
vocational Christian service whose ministries have been destroyed or at
least greatly diminished by some statement, action, or position carried
out by themselves, a friend, or an enemy. . . . .
damaged, diminished, or destroyed, by some form of irresponsible conduct.

In spite of my own strong and independent spirit, my lack of alertness,
and my own neglect, God has somehow miraculously protected me from many
such actions . . . . though I've certainly made my share of them to be
sure.

As I've considered the cure, I realize there are so many types of
blunders you and I can make, and there are so many forms of attacks
others can formulate, that it would be impossible to even try to give a
brief sampling of such conduct. It can range from attitudes to spoken
words to actions; and they can come from many arena's . . . . .
financial, theological, moral, ethical . . . .

In some ways, the cure depends on the situation. However, I think there
are some basic fundamentals that apply to almost every situation. For
example, if I find my ministry damaged by some irresponsible conduct on
my part or that of others, I think the first thing I must do is . . . .

1. Repent fully and completely from any attitude or action on my part
that has accompanied the situation. It may be merely my attitude toward
someone who has wronged me. Nonetheless, I must repent over that
attitude of resentment, anger, or desired revenge. Repentance is the
first step on the road to rebuilding.

2. Humble yourself. If we are guilty, we must fully admit it and
demonstrate a genuine spirit of sorrow and remorse, placing ourselves at
the mercy of those who we may have offended or injured in the process.
If we are the one victimized, we must demonstrate humility through
forgiveness and by becoming a servant of restoration toward those who
damaged our reputation or ministry.

3. Become accountable. Whether I did it to myself or someone did it to
me, I have a responsibility to be accountable in regards to the future.
I need someone to whom I can go and give account, whether it be to keep
me from making another mistake myself, or to help keep my behavior such
that attacks from others will soon prove to be unsubstantiated and
illogical.

It does not take one long to compare the ministries of people of renown
who have fallen prey to some form of irresponsible conduct to see the
difference between those who followed these principles and those who did
not. Some have ministries that flourish again, others have new and
meaningful ministries, while others still continue portraying false
humility and try to further build their own kingdoms.

It is still true that God honors repentance, humility, and accountable
servanthood.

Following these fundamental steps, I believe there are other elements to
curing the damage of irresponsible conduct. You might say these are
practical steps to protect you in the future. For example . . . .

4. Guard your soul by eliminating all forms of reading, listening,
viewing, and other means of influence that do not build you up ---- not
necessarily immoral stuff, but also irrelevant stuff. Paul told the
Colossian believers to "set your mind on the things above, not on the
things that are on earth" (3:2). There's more to it than avoiding sleazy
suggestive stuff; we must also avoid worthless stuff.

5. Guard your words, keeping them free from any type of conversation
that is not fully true, and wholly pure. Paul again speaks when he
addresses the issue both with the Colossian believers (3:8-9, 16-17) and
the church in Ephesus (4:15, 29).

6. Modify your ministry. Face it, friend ---- if you have made some
major mistakes, your ministry has been forever altered. Rather than try
to glue the past back together, consider starting with fresh clay and
create a newly modified ministry based on what you have learned and on
who you are today. If you try to salvage the past, it will only lead to
disappointment and a sense of unfulfilled failure.

7. Rejoice in the new opportunity God is giving you. Like Paul, "forget
the things that are behind, and look to the things ahead". Then press
toward the mark ---- the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

8. Immerse yourself in the presence of the Lord. Times of prayer, in
the Word of God, moments of solitude, fasting, prolonged times of worship
and praise. . . . all these things will draw you into the presence of the
Lord. Like the song writer, "turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in
His wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in
the light of His glory and grace."

It is in His presence you will find new acceptance . . . . a kind face .
. . . a tender hand to brush away the tear, . . . . a loving arm to
embrace you and hold you up, . . . . a good word that still says, "trust
Me, and do better my child."

I guarantee you, friend . . . . the more time you spend in the presence
of the Lord, the more love, grace, power, authority, and honor he will
give you before men. As James said, God "gives grace to the
humble"(4:4:6). Peter, therefore, gives stern and wise warning by
saying, "humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may
exalt you in the proper time" (I Pet 5:6).

FINALLY:

Well, there you have it . . . . another one of those things that can
perhaps haunt you as it has me ---- the thought of being disqualified and
put on the shelf by some irresponsible act on my part or that of another.

While I have no control over what others may do or say, I do have control
over what I may do or say. As a servant of the Lord, I am bound by the
Holy Spirit to be sure that, by my own irresponsible conduct, I neither
dishonor or discredit my own ministry nor that of another.

The mistakes I've made cannot be changed. The efforts of others to
undermine my ministry or criticize my efforts are things of the past.
Through them all, God has been abundantly faithful to restore me from
permanent hurt. I have learned more than you can ever imagine.
Sometimes He rescued me with an ambulance stationed at the bottom of a
cliff; at other times He protected me with a barrier at the top. Either
way, He was magnanimously merciful, and I am forever grateful.

I pray today dear friend that God will protect you from both
irresponsible conduct on your part and on the part of those who would
come against you in some way. I pray that you never shoot yourself in
the foot, and that you never fall prey to the assassins aim.

I pray that God will be both your shield and your strength, your help and
your hope. I pray that you will know "strength for today and bright hope
for tomorrow", and that you will never have to suffer the pain inflicted
by irresponsible conduct.

Have a great week. It's going to be a real whopper!

And, let me hear from you.

In His Bond of Sufficiency and Grace,

Bob Tolliver ---- (Rom 1:11-12)
Copyright April, 2001. All rights reserved.

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