SHOULDER TO SHOULDER #189 ---- 8/20/01
Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>
Fight the Good Fight of Faith
A personal letter of encouragement to you, written solely to "lift up hands that hang down".
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SHOULDER TO SHOULDER #189 ---- 8/20/01
TITLE: "Friendships ---- A Neglected Blessing"
My Dear Friend in Christ:
Today I wish for you special moments of refreshing, encouragement, peace, and hope. Refreshing because you have probably been giving more than you have been receiving. Encouragement because everything about you may be saying your work is futile. Peace because the enemy would try to intimidate you through accusation and a driving spirit. And hope because both past and present often lie to us and tell us all is hopeless.
So ---- if you have become dull and dry . . . . be refreshed! If you have been discouraged . . . . be encouraged! If you have been restless and frustrated . . . . be at peace! If you have given up . . . . receive hope!
Right now Jo Ann and I are in a state of mixed circumstances. We are thoroughly enjoying some "off" time where we have been able to visit some churches and spend time with some people for the first time in some three years. While we've been able to sing and speak in a few churches, it has all been rather spontaneous and not a part of a long standing itinerary.
At the same time we are very uncertain regarding future plans for the next three months. There are several needs we see that are drawing us, and we know we cannot do them all. And some of the planning and researching we're doing seem to be hanging out in the air somewhere beyond our view. Perhaps you would be willing to pray with us about these.
1. A need in Bosnia and Croatia to do a series of "reaching your cities through strategic ministry and prevailing prayer" follow up seminars. We are especially excited about the possibility of a "circuit" of seminars throughout Croatia in several major cities. Americans are accustomed to much more longer range planning than most of Europe, so it is easy to feel unclear when you don't feel you're able to make any concrete decisions. It is a matter of "when", not "if".
2. A new Bible school being formed in Sarajevo with classes beginning October 15. We have been asked to teach there, but don't know when yet. It will be helpful to know when we're needed and what subject we will be teaching. We hope to know something by the end of this week or early next.
3. A need for a series of "reaching your cities" and "prevailing prayer" conferences in various parts of the United States. We are in the tentative planning stages for one in southwest Missouri and another in the greater St. Louis area, and there are significant needs we know of in several other Midwestern areas. Trying to plan those seminars without knowing what our possible Fall obligations might be in the Balkans is an opportunity for consternation.
4. Several pastorless churches in our area who need some serious healing and encouragement. Our name has been given to some of them and we don't want to be unavailable to them if we are needed. One of these churches contacted us yesterday; we are to preach there September 9th and meet with their Church Council to consider the possibilities of my leading them in my "Interim With A Purpose" process.
5. Family responsibilities abound at the moment. Our oldest daughter and family return this Wednesday from Costa Rica and will be home for only a month before returning to Colombia South America for four years. We want to be available to them. Our oldest grandson is to be baptized August 29 and we really want to go but don't think we can. One of our granddaughters is being "crowned" in the youth missions organization in her church and we want to go for that in November.
6. Numerous "pending" invitations to sing, preach, or teach in several churches ---- ranging from one service to a full week of services. We're having a hard time fitting some of them into the calendar. Not knowing whether or not the Fall Balkans trip is going to happen adds uncertainty to the process.
7. Add to this mix the need and plans to do some important improvements around the house, do some serious writing, and complete the work on our new website, and you can perhaps understand our mild but increasing consternation with the unknown. Then the two-month long episodes I've had with computers and lawn mowers has done nothing but intensify the situation. (Jo Ann reminded me today that I've been taking a special class in character building lately. How true!) Amazingly, Jo Ann has been unbelievably patient regarding household and personal needs.
You probably experience similar situations. During those times it's been good for me to remember that "the steps of a righteous man are ordered of the Lord."
Through all this, I've been especially grateful the Lord has given me the grace to simply walk away from these stresses to enjoy moments of quietness and companionship with her. The past two weeks have been a special blessing as we've taken the time to sit on our deck and watch the beauty of God's creation put on a great show for us. We did again Sunday night, even though I still had much of this letter to write.
Gazing at flowers and sunsets, watching everything from deer and fawn to blue birds and humming birds, listening to rain approaching through the lofty leaves of the Oak and Hickory trees . . . . all of these special moments together have been not only a reprieve from the frustrations of uncertainty, but have also been times of simple emotional, spiritual, physical, and relational refreshing.
God is really good!
ANOTHER FOLLOW-UP LETTER:
Earlier this week I received an exciting letter from one of the students I taught in Kyiv, Ukraine this past January. He has since graduated and has returned to the city of his childhood to begin ministering in a church there. He returned, however, not because it was his hometown, but because it was the city God put in his heart during the class on "reaching your city through strategic ministry and prevailing prayer" ---- it was the city of his vision. His letter so excited me that I wanted to share parts of it with you. He really got the picture; I hope you have, too.
"How wonderful to hear what God is doing in your life. It's wonderful to see God's hand in everything. Praise God that we can know Him and trust Him.
"I have a little time to write to you about what God is doing in my life. God has started doing something great in the hearts of people. People in our church are starting to revive from their sleep.
" . . . last week I started to gather material for a web page about Kagarlyk. I also started to go and see all the monuments we have in town . . . . one of them stands right outside our church building and that concerns me.
"I've also started to gather material about our history.I found very little, only one book which talks about how Kagarlyk came into existence. But I do know that early our town was called Gorodets which means small town. So little by little we know what the purpose of our town. There are a few facts that show that our town was a beautiful place. But later man destroyed all that and everything is that way, it's such a pity. I believe God has put me here for the revival of this town and I want to do that for Jesus. Maybe I'll only start that and someone else will finish, but I'm glad it'll be in our town.
". . . . I started to meet with a group of the youth who I was able to share my vision with and do work so that the chains of the curse would fall from our city. But then the group broke up because they didn't have a desire to go to a little meeting where I share, so we need to pray for our city. But I think that's not all, there are some who still have a desire to meet together so we'll see what will come of that.
"At the moment my life is in spiritual warfare. . . . . . I think that Satan wants to disturb me so that I do less than I can. So please pray for my spiritual condition because I don't know what my role will be in these situations but I know one thing, if I didn't have these, then I wouldn't have this war in which I need to stand with the shield of faith. I also have a prayer need for finances. I still don't have any money so that I could rent and apartment and live. I'm living with my parents but this can't last for long, because my parents don't have enough money to look after me.
"Your brother in Christ, Sergei" (not real name).
Yesterday I got another letter from "Sergei" in which he indicated that he alone is praying for his city.
"It's so good that you write to me. I am really glad of this. You know, your letter came just in time. God is never late. This week, I looked at my activities and saw no results, and began to think that this isn't my place and so on. But your letter encouraged me. I am currently alone in the prayer ministry and it's very hard.
"This week I need to finish the video and I also need to find much more material. And I especially need to gather material about our economy and in general what our city is made up of. I have several photos of our city if you want. I need to finish now so that this can be translated and sent today. Thanks for everything."
Maybe you'd like to join "Sergei" in praying for his city, and also for him as he ministers. If you'd like to write him and tell him so, I'll send you his e-mail address if you'll write me at [email protected] .
"Sergei" really has the picture! How exciting to see someone who caught the vision and is taking it seriously.
AN OFT-MISSING INGREDIENT:
It is a statistically proven fact that people in ministries often have few if any people in whom they really delight. They have few individuals with whom or to whom they've ministered that have developed into spiritual troopers who bring great joy to their hearts every time they think of them.
I guess the reason I'm thinking that way today is because of several things that have happened over the past two weeks. Rather than trying to be profound, I want to expose my inner being a bit to you and let you get at least a glimpse of the bubbling joy that is mine simply because God has blessed Jo Ann and me with the privilege of crossing paths with some of the world's greatest people we've ever known. I could have written about Scott, Ron, Erin, Megan, Janna, Tonette, Dr. Schaffer, Steve, Margo, and others. I could have easily listed forty or fifty people, but these are the ones I have been prompted to write about.
1. Lynelle: a member of our first team to Croatia in 1996, she came home, graduated from college with a teaching degree. Instead of entering the public teaching sector here in America, she ended up as a missionary in Lima, Peru for three years, teaching a small handful of missionary kids. She returned to America recently, heart and mind filled with irreplaceable memories and experiences, to begin teaching in a Christian school in Fort Worth, TX. She's a very different gal from the one who, with an unbelievably picky and narrow appetite, had to eat fish soup (containing all parts of the fish . . . . ALL parts) at the Hope Center in Croatia.
2. John: also a member of our first team to Croatia in 1996, he went on to be a missionary in Egypt for two years, then returned to get his masters degree in intercultural evangelism. Today, I "work for him" ---- he's now the director of the University Missions program at the school we work with in some of our overseas teams.
3. Tami: a member of our 1998 and 1999 teams to Croatia, she returned to the Balkans and served as a missionary for two years in Sarajevo. She returned Saturday and now is weighing her options for the future.
4. Tara: a member of our 1997 and 1998 team to Croatia, she is now married to a minister of music in California. Next year they will continue their training by enrolling in seminary.
5. Tom: a member of our 1999, 2000, and 2001 Balkans team, God touched his heart in extraordinary ways on each trip . . . . so much so that he spent the entire Summer this year in Sarajevo. God opened doors of witness and ministry in unparalleled ways. Today he begins his senior year in college with the intent of going to seminary for further training. What a joy it has been to watch God's patient process go on in Tom's life.
6. Angi: a member of our 2000 and 2001 Balkans team who came home this Summer aware that God was calling her to a new direction. Changing her major from public education music to church music, she knows her future probably will be found somewhere in eastern Europe.
7. Candy: a member of our 1996 and 1997 teams to Croatia, she returned to complete school and enter nursing only to be drawn by the Holy Spirit to return to Sarajevo where she now serves as a missionary.
8. Tim: a member of our 2000 and 2001 team, this high school graduate had been fighting the call to the Gospel ministry. These trips, along with the privilege as serving as interim pastor in his home church, gave me an opportunity to watch God capture him again. After more than a year of working in a secular job, Tim begins classes in college today, preparing himself for further ministry.
9. Kurt and Chris: two college room mates who have known each other since grade school days. Both went on our 2001 Kiev trip last January. They will return with us again next January, having graduated from college in December, with the intent of staying for several months to explore the possibilities of a "sports evangelism" ministry in Ukraine.
10. Tasha: a piano music major on our 1996 team, she had an opportunity on that trip to play the piano in the same room where Beethoven, Mozart, and Chopin had played centuries earlier. Coming home she changed her major to Christian ministries and is now married to a church youth minister near St. Louis.
11. Mike: raised much of his life without a dad's influence, God called him to ministry. Following college, because he was married to our daughter's close friend, we talked about ministering together. They joined us on staff in Wisconsin where he served as associate pastor in charge of youth, resort ministries, and small group discipleship. After two years they moved to another state. Now he is back at that same church as pastor and leading them in the greatest period of numerical growth in the church's history. Today they run over 200 in attendance, and two weeks from yesterday they will dedicate a new worship center that seats some 300 people . . . . a far cry from the 90 or so people jammed into a make shift auditorium that would seat 125 at best.
12. Rochelle: a late comer to the 2001 Kiev team, it was her plan to be an elementary school teacher. God touched her heart on that trip. Upon our return we spent many hours talking together about her future as she sought for clarity as to His plan. Like some of the others above, she struggled with what she thought was life's direction as it seemed to contradict what God was now saying. One week ago she boarded a plane for Kiev, Ukraine, where she will teach school in an English speaking K-12 Christian school while she ministers the love of Christ among the people of Ukraine.
13. And then there's . . . . You: a person whom I possibly do not know personally (or maybe I do), willing to patiently read my weekly ramblings, apparently making yourself available to be somehow blessed by what I might write on any given week-end. Probably (but not necessarily) younger than I, you nonetheless read with a usually open mind whatever thoughts and insights I might be prompted to share. Amazingly, you have blessed me as much as any of these others I've mentioned. Strange as it may seem, I do indeed count you as a friend, and I thank God for you. We may never see each other this side of heaven, but I value my time with you just as much as I value my memories and occasional times with these others. Thank you.
THE BLESSING OF FRIENDSHIPS:
Lest you think I'm bragging about my own expertise and influence on these people I've mentioned, the real point I want to make is the value of special friendships. Frankly, I can make no claim to having influenced any of these special people. I just had the unique blessing of having met them, gotten to know them, spent time with them, learned to love them enough to pour a bit of my life into theirs, . . . . and then thank God gratefully for the privilege of having had our paths cross for a brief period of time.
My life has been more than enriched by knowing them. I miss them. I love to hang out with those who are still nearby. (Who would ever believe that young people in their late teens and twenties would want to hang around people like Jo Ann and me?!? Amazing!) I love to watch God's workmanship going on in their lives. I smile; I laugh; I weep in gratitude. I jump up and down in confident anticipation of what God's going to do in and through them next. It's a fun sight to watch. I want to yell, "Thanks, God! You made me a better person because of them!"
This is what I've been pondering the last two or three evenings sitting on the deck with Jo Ann,listening to the evening sounds and watching the sun go down. We are so incredibly blessed with special friendships.
But how does all this happen?
In His Divine economy of things, God places us on a life path that is going to take us to a certain destination. He does the same with others. Then, through some unknown set of circumstances, or perhaps by Divine design, our paths cross with some of them on the way. Sometimes it is a fleeting encounter; other times it is a lifetime relationship that is born. Sometimes we never know until it is nearly over ---- unless we take some time to think about it.
And, every time such an encounter takes place, we become an ingredient in a life changing equation that affects all of nature.
It is called "Influence". Thorndyke's Dictionary defines it as "the power of persons or things to act on others." Or "the power to produce an effect without using coercion." I like that one best.
The prefix, "in", simply refers to something taking place that brings about some level of internal consequences. It is the "induction" of something into something or someone.
"Fluence" is an interesting word that indicates something flowing easily, quickly, and comfortably. Someone who is "fluent" in an area is able to do that with such ease that it seems effortless, comfortable, and not laborious.
So, . . . . when the lives of people intersect, there is the potential for the gentle, comfortable, immediate, flowing induction of a part of each of them into that of the other. It's just a natural thing that happens, and it seems right.
Now, here's an interesting question: Who influences whom?
You see, friend, at first glance, you would assume that Jo Ann and I have been the "induct-ors" or "influenc-ors", and these other people have been the "induct-ees". And, if that actually has happened in a good way, I'm glad.
But . . . . the more I think about these special people, the more convinced I am that Jo Ann and I have been the blessed ones far more than we were blessings to them. Frankly, I can't imagine going through life without having known, enjoyed, and loved them. Our lives would be far less without them. Even now I think of Ron and Zelda, Jim and Jane, Joe and Thelma, Larry and Kathy, Scott and Vickie, Rod and Janie, Brian and Chris, Gregg and Jamie, Don and Laura, Bernard and Joyce, . . . . and so many, many more.
What an unbelievable blessing is friendship. Awesome! Too big for words! Wow!
Because it is, it demands of us an abundant measure of care, nurturing, and appreciation . . . . . lest it be broken like a piece of fine china slipping from the grasp of careless hands.
IN CONCLUSION:
Well, I could go on and on about this, but I have a probing question for you.
Where does your friendship lie? The Apostle Paul tells us that friendship with the world makes us an enemy to God. Perhaps David and Jonathan depict one of the greatest human friendships of all time. Jesus gives us perhaps the greatest picture of true friendship in John 15 when He shocks His disciples by telling them they are His friends.
Have you ever wondered why He would make such a statement? Think about it for a moment . . . . . . God Incarnate telling a bunch of humans they are His friends. Abraham was called God's friend.
What a profound thought! Deity and humanity . . . . .friends! God and man . . . . . blessing, loving, caring for, serving, and completing each other!
But that says something about the power of friendships, and should make it abundantly clear that such a unique relationship should never be taken lightly or neglected.
What, then, is the status of some of your friendships, my friend?
Do you have at least one close friend with whom there is the "in-fluence", the in-flow of care, love, joy, burden-bearing, celebrating, that you both need? Or have you taken that relationship for granted? Or neglected it? Or maybe even injured it by some word or action?
Is it possible you may have forgotten just how precious a gift this type of friendship is? It's easy to do, especially when you're in vocational ministry where expectations run so high, demands are so intense, and failures so unforgiving. It's far too easy to get so busy in service and religious activities, that friendships fade, . . . . even disappear and die.
Let me encourage you to sit down today and begin thinking about those people in your lives you would identify as friends . . . . or "used to be" friends.
Can you include your spouse in that list? If not, that's the first place to begin.
Do you remember some of the things these friends have invested in you?
Can you think of things you have invested in their lives?
Would it possibly be a good idea to strengthen that friendship? Maybe rekindle it? Perhaps restore it?
It would only take a phone call, . . . . a letter, . . . . . or maybe a visit.
A good policy for the week would be to 1) Bless a friend, 2) Re-connect with a friend, 3) Restore a friend, and 4) Make a new friend.
Of all the people in the world who need the benefits of genuine friendships, people like you and me who are in vocational or volunteer ministry may well need them the most. Let's not allow this week to go by without investing further in some of those friendships.
I thank God for the blessings of so many friendships. We are so enriched! Our cups are full and overflowing!
And I thank Him that I count you as a friend, and I pray that your life is enriched by me as my life has been enriched and strengthened by you. Like Paul, "I thank my God for every remembrance of you."
In His Bond of Mercy and Grace,
Bob Tolliver -- Rom 1:11-12
Copyright August, 2001
Life Unlimited Ministries
[email protected]
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