Quote from Forum Archives on August 23, 1998, 6:06 pm

Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>

Standing Shoulder To Shoulder in the Trenches,
Encouraging One Another as we "Fight the Good Fight"

TITLE: "Free To Be Me?"

Dear Fellow Laborer in the Lord:

Well ---- what a week it has been! "True Lies" and "Un-True Confessions"
in Washington, the Mark MaGuire saga in professional baseball, a
continuing roller coaster ride on Wall Street, world-wide economic
instability and uncertainty, unbelievable weather phenomena, increasing
international strained relationships, and more.

There seems to be little doubt that we are indeed coming down to the
final chapters of human history as we know it. The ongoing
disintegration of every man-made institution gains momentum daily, and
the attack on the two God-made institutions increases with ever more
violent agendas and intensity. Never in all human history, in my opinion
at least, have the institutions of man seemed so fragile, and the
institutions of God responded so inadequately.

The exciting thing to me, however, is that, as man draws closer to
exhausting all his own answers and resources to human needs, the Lord
Jesus Christ stands in the wings ---- waiting for the sound of the
trumpet.

What a perfect time to be alive! What unparalleled opportunities to
share the Gospel! Talk about being on the cutting edge ---- friend,
there's never been a greater opportunity and a more exciting time to be
alive and serving the Lord than right now!

That's why my topic today is so compelling to me. Every man and woman of
God in both vocational and volunteer ministry needs to know beyond any
doubt that he or she is exactly where God intended, doing specifically
what God has instructed. The price is far too great to be serving God in
the wrong way, for the wrong reason, out of a wrong calling, or in the
wrong place.

WRITE MY OWN JOB DESCRIPTION?

If you had the opportunity to write your own job description for
ministry, based on what you felt your calling, giftings, and desires
were, would it be the same as what the average church would write for
you?

More directly, would it be the same as what you are currently ministering
under?

I've thought about that often. I found myself sometimes caught between
two idealogies of ministry which, though they should have been in
harmony, often seemed to be coming from two opposite approaches and
speaking out of two sides of the same mouth ---- the contemporary model
of ministry that we, especially in western countries, have come to
embrace and accept as being the norm, and the description I read over and
over in the Bible which seems so uniquely strange and foreign to what I
have often known in personal experience.

I grant you that cultural changes have much to do with the way church
looks and acts from one generation or locale to the next, but the
disturbing thing to me is that too often we have allowed culture to
dictate our ministry more than we have allowed the Word of God.

We look at the Biblical pattern as at the least being strange, and at the
most being unrealistic and unworkable.

It reminds me in some ways of the statement from the great Chinese pastor
and writer the late Watchman Nee in his book on Romans entitled *The
Normal Christian Life*, in which he said something like this: ---- "The
normal Christian life seems so abnormal because we are so subnormal."

I have great sorrow in my heart that, for many of us, we have abdicated
the true God-given call and pattern to ministry, and have settled for man
made caricaturizations. (I dealt extensively with some of these issues
in #10 through #14 letters ---- "Seven Strangle holds On The Servant".)

What is it in us, even though called of God to minister and serve the
Church of the Lord Jesus Christ, that cries out to beckon and reaches out
to embrace forms, attitudes, motives, and resources that, in some form or
another, fail to fit the pattern spelled out in the Bible? Can it
possibly be some "nerve gas" residue of which I wrote in letter #19,
"Victory Over the Flesh"? If it is, we are in big trouble ---- because
nerve gas produces only one thing ---- Death!

So ---- back to those two questions: If you had a chance to write your
own job description of ministry, based on your vision, your heart's
desire, and your giftings, would you change anything from that under
which you are now operating?

Chances are, you would.

If you did write your own job description, after you were done with it,
would it fit where you are now serving, and would the people to whom you
minister be willing to readily accept it as the pattern for you to live
by?

Before you write that off as unreasonable, let me give you a personal
testimony.

A number of years ago we were looking for someone to serve in a specific
area of ministry. I must admit, having served in numerous multiple duty
positions myself, our needs and preferences were far too much for one
person to tackle.

We began to talk with one young man and his wife about possibly coming to
help us in those areas. However, we approached it from what most people
would say was a highly unorthodox, but what I believe the Bible indicates
was a totally logical and reasonable approach.

We based our exploratory discussions on two simple questions:

1. "Does God want you to join us in ministry as part of the leadership
team of this church?"

2. "If He does, what do you think He wants you to be doing?"

We actually asked this young man, on the basis of His calling from God
one the one hand and what he saw in our church on the other, to write his
own "job description".

Now, my friend, I have served, if I recollect accurately, in fourteen
different churches plus extensive itinerant ministry over a period of 42
years in churches ranging in size from 20 members to 1,100 members. I
came and went in eleven of those churches during the first fourteen years
of my ministry, and the remaining three in twenty-two years. In ten of
those churches I served in some type of staff position, and the last four
I served as pastor.

And in all of those occasions, friend, NOT ONE TIME was I ever asked
those two questions. Every single church told me THEY felt God was
calling me there (and, I might add, I felt the same; otherwise I wouldn't
have gone.).

And, NEVER ---- Never Ever was I asked what I felt God wanted me to do as
part of my job description. The church always told me what they wanted
me to do.

Now, to be sure, a certain measure of clarification is inherent in the
process itself ---- between God, the church, you, and your spouse, you
should have some inkling of the answers to those questions. And,
obviously, if I wasn't comfortable with their description, I could always
negotiate ---- or not accept the call.

The point is, however, that every single call I've ever received from a
church, was based as much on, and perhaps more on, man-made criteria and
circumstances than on what kind of man I was and what I felt God was
calling me to do.

And, I believe that fact, typical as it appears to be, is one reason why
so many people in ministry are so insecure, unfulfilled, and unhappy deep
inside.

WOULD YOU CHANGE IT?

In my letter two weeks ago, entitled "A Big-Time Shake-up", I mentioned
an array of statistics about people in vocational ministry. If you
review those, several pertained to the role of the minister in the slot
he or she is currently occupying.

Another survey, taken three or four years ago asked the following
questions:

1. If you thought you could do something else altogether besides what
you're presently doing, would you do it?

2. If you had a chance to change your ministry in some way, would you do
so?

To the first question,which pertains to all changes, including leaving
vocational ministry and entering some other field of vocation, 40% of the
ministers and 80% of the spouses said "Yes!"

To the second question, which pertains to making changes but remaining
in vocational ministry, 70% of the ministers and 60% of the spouses gave
a definite "Yes!".

The one thing I saw in that report was that a very high percentage of
ministers are significantly dissatisfied with some aspect of their
ministry. Another thing, however, was that most of them had no desire to
throw in the towel and leave vocational ministry, but would welcome some
type of change that would once again enable their ministry to make some
type of significant difference.

Why does such a condition as this exist?

As you remember from my letter two weeks ago, God's question to me during
a great personal struggle in 1979 was, "Bob, if you could do anything in
the world you'd want to do in serving me, and money was no object, what
would you do?"

Would you do the same thing, or would you make some kind of change?

Now I would not dare use my personal experience as a standard of
measurement for anyone else to use. At the same time, I believe that
question is one that needs to be asked of every person in ministry, and
one which I believe God desires to ask you.

If YOU ---- You ---- could do ANYTHING in the world in serving the Lord,
and money was no object, WHAT would YOU do?

Think about it! Ponder it! Dream! Imagine!

In the remainder of my letter, I'd like to address three things:

1. Factors that Create this tension
2. A Biblical Principle For Hope
3. Practical suggestions

FACTORS THAT CREATE SUCH TENSION:

What has happened that so many ministers and their spouses feel such a
lack of fulfillment, sense of inadequacy, and dissatisfaction with their
roles that they are searching for some type of change? What is in our
religious systems that often keeps so many from feeling like they are
"free to be me" in vocational ministry?

Why is it that so many people in vocational ministry experience stress
and lack of fulfillment that seem to have their roots deeply imbedded in
our system of Christianity? Why, after sometimes experiencing what all
human reason would identify as resounding success, are there still so
many who walk away empty?

What has brought us to such a state that even the question itself of "If
you could do anything in the world . . . " seems both unreasonable and
unrealistic ---- and even blasphemous?

I certainly have not listed everything that may be factors, and I don't
have time or space to adequately treat that issue, but let me note the
following seven areas:

1. An unscriptural pattern of ministry that has become the standard of
measurement and definition of ministry. For example, . . .

1) Differentiation between laity and clergy, which not only separates
and segregates Christians into two separate camps, but also becomes an
excuse for lack of ministry on the one hand, the function of ministry
that is unattainable on another, and a sense of frustration for the
minister who is trying to properly serve the Lord and the church on yet
another.

2) Professionalization of ministry, where the minister now becomes
the skilled and trained CEO, administrator, motivational speaker,
performer, evangelist, and chaplain who "leaps tall buildings with a
single bound" and maintains the "professional" barrier between himself
and the rest of the members, and also becomes the criteria by which the
members judge his performance and worth. (And, the minister, tragically,
also seeks to gain his own sense of worth by performing and jumping
through those predetermined hoops.)

3) Overly structured, rigid and antiquated "job descriptions" which
do not allow for personality uniqueness, spiritual gifts, interpersonal
styles and skills, family status, or human strengths or weaknesses.
Often such job descriptions have been written by some isolated individual
sitting in some agency office with absolutely no information of any kind
about that particular church or the person being considered ---- what I
call a form of assembly line mass production, spitting people out into
the ministry world in indiscriminate fashion.

4) Erroneous and narrow view of what "ministry" is, based primarily
on man-made definitions and criteria often promoted and fostered by
well-meaning traditions, Bible schools, and denominations. (Now don't
come away from here thinking I'm denomination or seminary bashing!)

5) Relational conflicts and battles for control, perceiving
ministers to be everything from "hired guns", employees of the church,
errand boys of the church boards, church secretaries, or a baby-burping
"nursery workers", to domineering dictators or first class professional
manipulators.

2. Failure to recognize and honor unique spiritual giftings and callings
which God has given to each person, instead looking more at other
criteria such as education, people skills, human talents and abilities,
the number of schooling degrees after his name, or age.

3. Expectations of others which, because ministers always have a heart
to please, create a spiritual bondage that will hinder effectiveness,
generate tentativeness, promote unrealistic expectations, and rob the
minister of his sense of self worth.

4. God's activity in refining, changing, or enlarging a ministry as He
seeks to provide . . . .

1) A fresh vision to replace the one that has run its course or has
died from disappointment.

2) A new calling as God did with most major New Testament characters.
While basic motivations are constant, ministries are often temporary,
and manifestations are usually transient. There's nothing wrong with God
giving a new calling and anointing. When that happens, change is
inevitable.

3) A different or enlarged direction. As God does a "new thing" in
us, He often enlarges the scope of our ministry or changes the direction
for us. We need to recognize that, and not hang onto the past forms.
New wine skins are the order of the day. One thing you can say about God
---- though He is faithful, He is Not predictable or required to keep
the same model He has used before.

5. Inaccurate understanding of one's calling in the first place. Many
ministers who are genuinely called to vocational ministry are actually
ministering in the wrong setting. Some pastors are really called to be
vocational evangelists or missionaries. Many worship leaders are really
called to be pastors. Many deacons are really called to be chaplains or
pastors. Nothing is more frustrating than to try to carry out your
God-given calling in the wrong setting.

6. Temporal restrictions. Often ministers feel like they really can't
serve the Lord in ministry as they should or would like to because of
things such as . . .

1) Inadequate or improper education.

2) Insufficient finances.

3) Undeveloped communication skills.

7. Family conflicts, pressures, expectations, and aspirations. It is
amazing how many people I meet where the husband and wife do not share
the same sense of call or commitment to ministry.

While there certainly are exceptions, I strongly believe that when God
calls one person to ministry, He calls the other to at least be
supporting partner who either sees the same vision or is totally content
to live by the vision of the first.

THE BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE FOR OUR CALLING:

You may be asking, "Bob, I am fascinated by your approach to ministry,
but what is the Biblical basis for your believing God would ask such as
question as, 'If you could do anything in serving me . . .'?"

Well, I base it on the following Scriptures:

1. Psalm 37:4-6 ---- "Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you
the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in
Him, and He will do it. And he will bring forth your righteousness as
the light, and your judgement as the noonday."

The key, of course, is to delight in the Lord. The Hebrew word is
"'anag" which basically means to be generously and liberally soft or
pliable in your grateful positioning before the Lord. By that definition
it is clear that we are to be soft and pliable to the presence and
purposes of the Lord.

The first thing we must recognize is that if we do have such a
disposition toward Him, our desires are going to come from that
disposition, which means that the likelihood of having wrong desires is
very low.

Then, our "Mish'alah" or desire or petition, because it is emanating from
our pliable hearts of delight in Him, will be right on target, and He has
promised to grant those desires.

He goes on to say that if we commit our way to the Lord and trust in Him,
He will do it.

That is the main verse God used to remind me that He genuinely has lots
of fun letting me dream and ask. And, frankly, I'd rather ask and ask
wrong and NOT get what I had asked, than to not ask and miss out!

So, to me, it is not unreasonable for God to ask me the question He did,
and then work in my life to refine the request and delight then in not
only shaping my desires that come out of my delight in Him, but then
grant my desires. For additional study, look at Psalm 21:2 and Psalm
145:19

2. Psalm 84:11 ---- "For the Lord God is a sun and shield: the Lord
gives grace and glory; No good thing does He withhold from those who walk
uprightly."

Again, if I am walking uprightly, I have every right as His child to ask
Him for good things. If, therefore, the dream of my heart for ministry,
then I can anticipate Him making that possible unless it does not fit
into His sovereign plan for my life.

We need to get over the notion that serving God in vocational ministry is
going to be a drudgery. Some people act as if it were some type of
prison sentence.

3. Matthew 7:11 ---- "If you then, being evil, know how to give good
gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven
give what is good to those who ask Him!"

As I said earlier, based on the fact that God is my perfect and personal
heavenly Father who delights in giving good things to His children, I
should not hesitate to ask. Again ---- I'd rather ask and ask wrong and
be corrected, than not ask and miss out.

There are other passages to which I could refer, but I don't want to
belabor the point.

All I can say, friend, is if you feel your ministry doesn't quite fit
what you feel in your heart ---- like there are aspects expected of you
that you do not feel are part of God's calling, or there are aspects you
have a burden to do that you cannot do ---- I believe I'd check to see if
the Lord is asking you . . .

"If you could do anything in the world you wanted to do in serving me,
and money was no object, what would you want to do?"

PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS:

If that is where you are, let me make the following suggestions as you
begin the process of discovery:

1. Don't let this question become an escape hatch for a lack of
discipline, responsibility, or accountability. It's not a cop-out for
undisciplined irresponsible living. And it is certainly not a way to get
out of doing the mundane things that accompany every ministry. Nor is it
an easy way out of a difficult setting in which your ministry resides.

2. Make sure your are in right fellowship with God. Unresolved
conflicts, unconfessed sin, etc. can give a wrong reading to that
question as you try to answer it.

3. If you are unhappy or unfulfilled in your ministry, take whatever
time and measures are necessary to find out why. Is it . . . .
1) Because of a lack of personal spiritual discipline and growth?
2) Because of so-called personality conflicts with others?
3) Because of an undisciplined personal life?
4) Because of family issues with your spouse, children, parents, or
in-laws?
5) Because of a false or misunderstood "call" to ministry?
6) Etc.

4. Take time to let God ask you that question: "If you could do
anything in the world in serving me, and money was no object, what would
you do?"

5. At this point, let your dreams run loose, your imagination soar, and
your aspirations run with the wind. Don't discount anything. Be like a
child going into a candy store with a grandfather that said you could
have anything there.

6. Try to totally lay aside any and all traditional, structural, or
cultural boxes or slots commonly used to describe in human terms what
ministry is like. Don't try to fit your thoughts into a pre-conceived
concept. Be original. Forget about institutional jargon and
denominational models.

7. Write down what you feel and see. You need to be able to clearly
articulate what you're feeling. By writing them down you are able to see
it with your naked eye, cull through some of the "gibberish", edit it,
refine it, and shape it into a clearly understood statement.

8. Don't rush. Take your time. God's not in nearly as much hurry as
you probably are. If it takes weeks, months, or even years, let the
process run its course.

9. Sit down with your spouse OFTEN and talk about what you feel and
what your dreams are. I cannot describe to you the joy I felt in, first
of all, discovering that Jo Ann understood my frustrations, and, second,
that many of her own thoughts confirmed my own.

10. Ask your spouse to share his or her own dreams and aspirations.
Whatever God is calling you to do, they must fit into that calling and
pattern ---- and there Must be agreement. That's why talking about it
often is so important. Again, give plenty of time; it may come as a
shock to your spouse when he or she first hears what you are thinking.
It may also come as a shock to you what your spouse is thinking.

11. Bounce it off of some close friends and family members who are
spiritually mature and wise. Get some input from them, but don't let any
negative comments dissuade you from further exploration.

12. Once you have come to a clear understanding, it's time to decide
---- are you going to do it, or not? If you do it, what will it cost
you? Are you willing to pay that price?

13. Now it's time to share it with key leaders in your arena of
ministry. If it is a church, you need to share your pilgrimage, your
heart, and your new vision of what God is calling you to do.

14. Give the leaders opportunity to digest, evaluate, and pray over what
you've shared. They now have some issues to deal with concerning not
only your ministry, but that of their own church.

15. At a given point in time, it will be necessary to make some choices.
If the leaders in the arena of your ministry feel this is of God, then
it's time to make appropriate adjustments on their part to give you room
to minister the way God has called you. If they do not feel that way,
then some hard choices have to be made; do you back off and settle back
into the old routine, or do you take that as an indicator that it is time
to part ways and you go on with God as He has outlined your life?

16. Take action!

IN CONCLUSION:

If you remember from my story, you know that I was already actively
involved in ministry, had been successful, and had been very happy doing
what I was doing.

However, there came a point in time when God's new call on me did not fit
the form and structure with which I had become so comfortable in a local
church setting. It wasn't the church's fault, I had not strayed away
from the Lord, and it wasn't God playing a trick on me.

It was simply a matter of a fresh call and a fresh anointing for that
call ---- and staying where I was doing what I had been doing was not
going to satisfy my soul, edify the church, or fulfill His purposes. It
was not fair to me, to my family, or to the church. Not only did I need
a fresh start on a new ministry, but the church needed another shepherd
---- one whose heart was a shepherds heart. Mine no longer was.

So, I ask you again, my friend ---- "If you could do ANYTHING you wanted
to do in serving the Lord . . . .

What would it be?

If you feel you are right where you belong doing exactly what you should
be doing, then I am glad, and you should be thankful. There is no
greater pleasure in the heart of the servant of God than to know without
doubt that He is completely at the Master's bidding, thrilled to
proclaim, "In Him I live ---- I move ---- and I have my being!"

However, if you are in a rut, if you feel inadequate, if you feel
unfulfilled, if you feel hampered and restricted, maybe it's time to sit
down and ask yourself a question: ---- "If I could do anything . . . . ."

My heart's desire is that every vocational and volunteer minister will
know the thrill, the fulness, and the joyous adventure of ministering
freely and fully without man-made restrictions or limitations. May it be
so for you, my friend.

May God either Validate you or Liberate you!

In Christ's Bond,

Bob Tolliver ---- Rom 1:11-12
Copyright, August, 1998. All rights reserved.

Life Unlimited Ministries
E-mail: [email protected]
Ph: 417-275-4854
Fax: 417-275-4855