SHOULDERS #69 ---- 5/10/99
Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>
As We fight The Good Fight
SHOULDER TO SHOULDER #69 ---- 5/10/99
TITLE: "Past, Present, Future: How To Deal With Them"
My Dear Friend:
Are you well today? I really hope so! My heart's desire is that every
recipient of this letter today be abiding in His Rest, exulting in His
Praise, standing in His Victory, and faithfully serving out of His
Compassion.
POT POURRI:
Nearly weekly I receive information about significant issues that would
be important to many people. Because I try very hard to make best use of
the time and space needed, there is seldom opportunity to include
everything.
So, on occasion, I'll devote my letter to addressing these resources.
Today is such a day.
However, I do have a very important word of encouragement later in the
letter ---- so please read on. I think it will bless you.
In the meantime . . . .
1. VIRUS WARNINGS. They're a dime a dozen. I get several weekly, some
that have been around for months. The vast majority are absolute hoaxes.
However, there are some legitimate ones.
For example, the Melissa virus is making another round in some areas, so
beware. Here is a notice I recently received about Melissa:
"Subject: Melissa Virus Re-Occurrence
"NOTICE! IMMEDIATE ACTION REQUIRED
"Delete file - do not open word file titled "PERDIEM.DOC". File - a
memorandum from PEC contains "Melissa Virus".
"The key precaution is to have current anti-virus software loaded on your
workstation which occurred on the previous instance of melissa. I would
continue to warn users to delete messages saying "Important message from
........" . There are still people opening these messages.
"STOP! These e-mail messages readily identify who keeps opening them.
The word has been out for some time not to open these messages.
"Randy L. De Koter, LTC Iowa ARNG
Director of Information Management
[email protected]"
In addition, here are some guidelines to help you in discerning the real
from a hoax:
1) Check for grammar and punctuation. Legitimate warnings will
usually be well done.
2) Check to see if it "targets" a person, product, or company (such
as AOL, Bill Gates, etc.) If it does, it's probably a hoax by someone
wanting to create a negative reaction toward that "target".
3) Check to see if it warns of "total wipe out" ---- especially by
simply opening an e-mail file. Generally speaking, that is impossible.
4) Check the date of the original letter if possible. If it is more
than a few days old, it's probably a hoax.
Finally, here is a web site I learned of that will help you with the
virus situation:
http://www.icsa.net/services/consortia/anti-virus/alerthoax.shtml.
2. OUR FRIEND TONETTE: Perhaps you remember our missionary friend who
contracted malaria and then had one of her students die from the same
thing. So many of you commented about her, that I've included portions
of her letter from last week.
"It is now Monday night. I fell asleep on Tricia's couch, slept an hour
or more, and have just returned home.
"This morning was very hard. Tricia took me to school . . . I went into
my room and locked the door behind me so I could be alone for a bit. I
went through Michael's desk, and wept. I found a poem he'd written for
his mother some time ago when we did them as a class. He'd not given it
to her yet. I know she was glad to have it.
"About 10 minutes before class was to start someone knocked on the door.
It was two parents of other students. They had a box to collect
Michael's things for his parents. I broke down crying again just packing
it all away.
"Finally I had to turn the lights on and unlock the doors to let the
class come in when school started. There was a crowd of parents and
other teachers gathered outside. I told the kids to sit in our reading
corner and we'd talk about it. We used 3 boxes of tissues and several
rolls of toilet paper the next couple of hours. It was all just so
hard.
"Everyone knew I had been so sick, and the parents were concerned I might
pass out right there in the room. I told the kids I would go home while
they were at lunch, and that I'd be back in the morning - and that we'd
face this memorial service thing together tomorrow. We cried a little
more together, and hugged each other. Then Tricia showed up to take me
back home.
"On the way we stopped at a place to have lunch. I ate a piece of her
bread and drank some water, and it all seemed to stay down alright. She
brought me home, and I went back to bed crying myself to sleep.
"Woke up about 5pm. She came back then to be with me again. Also
Connie, a missionary nurse, called about then to check on my health. That
was good. Another missionary came to visit, and brought flowers. After
that I walked over to Tricia's, and fell asleep on her couch almost as
soon as I sat down. Ate the crust of a piece of pizza over there when I
woke up, and drank some apple juice, and now I'm home.
"That's been my day. I think the hardest part to face is over now.
Tomorrow will be tough too. Then things ought to start settling in again
somehow. I hope.
"These have been my very darkest days in a long time. Thank you for
writing, and for praying for me.
"Love you so much ----Tonette"
(I just got another letter from Tonette today which I'll share next week;
you'll find it interesting.)
3. A GREAT PRAYER MINISTRY. Last Thursday in the United States was our
National Day of Prayer and Fasting. It was the first in a long time that
I was unable to participate in locally.
One of the signs of impending revival and awakening is a return to
prayer. A ministry I learned of more than 10 years ago is Intercessors
For America. They offer printed material for bulletin inserts and a
variety of other services, including the national distribution of prayer
requests.
If you e-mail them at [email protected] they will forward you the latest
prayer needs [once a week] from around the nation. Their web site is
http://www.ifa-usapray.org.
4. GREAT E-MAIL NEWSLETTER SERVICE. It has come to my attention that
MAF and other organizations have changed their policies or costs on
servicing e-mail newsletters such as "Shoulder To Shoulder".
I want to recommend the service I use ---- at no cost. If you send a
regular letter as I do, please check out this service at
<[email protected]>. Glen is a fine Christian brother who
donates his energy and resources to host more than 70 such letters on a
regular basis.
5. Y2K AND YOUR VCR. Here is something I bet you hadn't thought would
be an issue for Y2K. Some, if not most, VCR's won't be able to use the
programmed advanced recording feature.
Do not throw away your VCR in the year 2000! Simply set the year on 1972
because the calendar days of the week and month will be the same as the
year 2000.
Pass this on because you know most manufacturers will not share this
information. They will want you to buy a new one that is Y2K compliant.
6. OUTSTANDING MINISTRY ON FORGIVENESS. The more I study human nature,
world conditions, and the Church, the more convinced I am that
Forgiveness is the fundamental root issue.
I highly recommend Jeff Floyd's "Lay Aside Every Weight" ministry. In
addition to his regular newsletter "Today", Jeff conducts week-end
seminars on the subject. I strongly endorse his ministry. Tens of
thousands have been set free and restored by attending his conferences.
He can be reached at <[email protected]>. He ministers internationally.
You might want to subscribe to his newsletter as well.
7. Andrew Craig is an Aussie brother I met through this letter. We've
never met, but he has blessed me through his "Fair Dinkum" internet
magazine. This past week I received a letter in which he requested my
help. So ---- here it is. I not only am notifying previous users, but
suggesting all others check his ministry out.
"Bro Andrew Craig who edits AUSTRALIA'S FAIR DINKUM MAGAZINE
dinkum.cjb.net ) was recently hit by a computer virus. He has lost
all of his email reader list (850+ people) . If you would like to receive
his e-zine updates, please email him at: [email protected].
NOW TO THE MAIN THING:
His name is Keith ---- a real person. I first heard from him April 16th.
Here is part of what he wrote:
"Bob,
"I thank God for your ministry. You are truly an angel on earth.
"My wife and I are both first-born PKs. . . We both experienced the
members of the congregation taking priority over the family, the
"everything is fine" mask that we put on before leaving the house, our
fathers not having some that ministered to them as a person, etc.
"We have also known churches that were deeply hurt by a split or the
minister leaving under less than happy circumstances. Because of these
experiences, we can connect with your ministry. Keep up the good work.
It is vital that this work continue to prevent the devil from destroying
our churches.
"I am writing today to request your prayers for both our fathers.
After describing the circumstances of both pastors, he concluded with the
following.
"I do not believe that most ministers fully understand how their ministry
impacts their families. Again, thank you for your ministry to ministers
and broken and hurting churches."
There were a number of factors in his letter that prompted me to write
back ---- his e-mail address, his reference to the Midwest, and other
elements. Through several follow-up letters between us, I found that,
while our own paths had not personally crossed, they had come very close.
The clincher came, however, when I discovered that his father-in-law is
someone I've known for over 20 years and lives less than 60 miles from
our home.
THEN THE SLOGAN SHOWED UP:
During one of those exchanges of e-mail messages, I noticed a little
phrase showed up at the bottom. I read it ---- and thought ---- "That is
a great slogan for the church where I'm doing the "Interim With A
Purpose" strategy.
So, I wrote Keith and asked him about the slogan. Here's some of what he
said, shared with his permission.
"One day during my divorce I had hit bottom (and was still digging). It
was a Sunday afternoon. I was going to the office in an attempt to find
something I could identify with that had some worth.
"I came upon an old AMC Pacer that was being held together with bumper
stickers. The road dirt made most of the stickers unreadable. Except
for one -- white with black lettering and apparently no road dirt.
"This sticker was not new, others overlapped it. The words spoke to me.
My life, my attitude, my focus changed that day. God had spoken to me.
The words are now burned on my heart.
Heal the Past... Live the Present... Dream the Future..."
Thanks, Keith, for sharing that incredible slogan. It is packed with
truth ---- liberating truth.
HEAL THE PAST:
Most people don't. They live in it, they try to forget it, they crumble
under it, they use it as a weapon on others.
But they never heal it.
Many in the ministry need to heal the past.
Many are out of the ministry because of it.
Though it can be ignored, the past cannot be changed. Though it can be
regretted, it cannot be re-lived (except in the memories of your own
mind). Though it can be suppressed, it can never be erased.
There is only one thing you can do with the past ---- acknowledge it and
benefit from it.
Few people in vocational ministry avoid hurts and wounds. In fact, few
people of any vocation do.
So ---- what do you do with a past filled with painful memories and sad
regrets?
You try to heal it.
The funny thing is, though, that you can't heal it yourself.
You see, my friend, the Only thing ---- the Only thing ---- that will
heal a painful past is forgiveness. A forgiveness that is derived from
and built on the forgiveness of God in Jesus Christ.
Adrian Rogers is one of America's great preachers ---- with an articulate
style and a deep oratorical voice that booms off the rafters. He made a
profound statement about wounds.
There are two sources of wounds ---- intended and unintended. No matter
which, they both hurt.
There are also two kinds of wounds ---- clean and infected. Clean wounds
are those that are immediately washed out with forgiveness, giving the
infection of bitterness no opportunity to begin its painful irritations
and ultimate destruction.
So ---- how do you deal with the past, my friend?
Through forgiveness.
No matter how deep the wound, no matter how damaging the blow, you
release yourself from the past through forgiveness.
There is no other way.
It doesn't matter whether or not forgiveness was requested. It certainly
doesn't matter whether or not forgiveness is deserved ----- none ever is.
I'll leave it at that ---- there is much more I'd like to share in the
future.
In the meantime ---- Step One: Heal The Past ---- through Forgiveness.
LIVE THE PRESENT:
One thing that keeps some people from living in the present and taking
full advantage of the blessings and opportunities therein is the fact
that they insist on living in the past.
You can't do both. It's one or the other.
I've seen numerous pastors who miss the present because they live in the
past of a previous forced termination or some personal failure ---- or
even past successes.
Interestingly, I don't believe it's really possible to live the present
without first dealing with the past. That has been the case in my own
life.
My past does not necessarily contain all the rattling skeletons and
stinking corpses that the past of others might. However, I do have my
share of painful memories.
My friend, Jeff Floyd (whom I mentioned earlier), describes painful
memories as being like ping pong balls which we try to suppress by
pressing them down into our sub conscious like trying to push ping pong
balls down in a bowl of water.
As long as there are just one or two, we can pretty well control them.
However, either as we weary from trying or as memories increase, they
eventually become unmanageable and they periodically pop to the surface.
When that happens, we are either embarrassed, we try to hide, or we
strike out in anger.
Whichever it is, we find ourselves paralyzed in our attempts to live the
present ---- all we do is remember the past.
So ---- if you want to live the present to the fullest, you must first
deal with the past.
Then you must embrace the present and live it to its fullest. Don't let
those special moments go by. Don't let adversities steal your hope.
Don't let sad times rob you of your joy.
Learn to live a life of continual rejoicing. Make the grand discovery
that appreciation for today is not controlled by circumstances and
events.
Don't allow others to regulate for you, by their own attitudes, the
measure of quietude, contentment, joy, and fulfillment which you have.
Your hope is in God, not others. Your faith has found a resting place in
Him ---- not in conditions.
Life Life ---- now! ---- to its fullest!
DREAM THE FUTURE:
Again, this is an awesome and exciting challenge.
But ---- how can you dream the future when you can neither manage the
present or forget the past?
And, yet ---- dreaming the future is indispensable for Christian
ministry. Without a vision, the people perish ---- "wander around like
an unguided and unruly mob".
Years ago, God asked me a question deep in my spirit that I have never
gotten over. "Bob, if you could do anything in the world in serving me
that you wanted you to do, and money was no object, and you knew you
couldn't fail, what would you do?"
Life Unlimited Ministries is a result of my answering that question.
Many of us have been raised with the idea that it is sinful to dream
dreams. God already has His will mapped out for us, and it is our
tedious task to try to figure out what it is.
That seems contrary to David's admonition in Psalm 37:4 when he says,
"Delight thyself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your
heart."
Friend, if you understand that God is your Heavenly Father Who desires
that you be happy and fulfilled in your service to Him, then you'll gain
the confidence to answer that question for yourself.
Why is it so important to dream dreams?
Because that's where vision is born. Dreaming dreams is the action that
produces the vision of what God wants for you.
What, then, is vision?
Well, this my not be totally theologically accurate, but I really like
this definition.
Vision is simply seeing what God sees.
In order to see what God sees, I believe it is imperative that you first
deal with the past. Heal the past through the principled practice of
forgiveness.
Then learn to be content in the present, embrace it, and live it with
exuberance.
Finally, then, you will be in a position to let your imagination soar
into the world of what can be, rather than wallowing in the mire of what
could have been.
IN CONCLUSION:
It's not too late, my friend to do it.
Do what?
Heal the Past.
Live the Present
Dream the Future.
It works. I know it works.
Why?
Because, my friend, just last night God prompted me to share these three
thoughts with the church where I am interim pastor at the moment.
God broke through in His mighty healing and restoring presence. People
were weeping as I spoke. At the close of the service people came to the
alter to pray. God touched the heart of the youth pastor on his final
service in that position and ministered to him for the pain in his own
heart over how he had been treated, and then gave him hope for the future
ahead.
Just as we concluded the service a lady came to the front and spoke to
the congregation asking forgiveness for having spent nearly a year of
speaking death and condemnation on her brothers and sisters through her
negative and complaining words.
The process has begun.
Thank you, Keith, for being sensitive to the prompting of the Holy Spirit
when He arrested your heart with that bumper sticker. And thank you for
sharing it at the bottom of some of the letters you sent to me.
I am grateful.
My friend, I have never been so confident of a truth as I am of this.
Paul articulated it in this way. "Brethren, I do not regard myself as
having laid hold of [that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ
Jesus,] yet. But ---- one thing I do; forgetting what lies behind and
reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the
prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." (Phil 3:13)
Do it, my friend ---- heal the past through forgiveness.
Life the present by joyfully embracing it.
Dream the Future by discovering what God sees.
And then ---- drop me a note and tell me what's happening.
In His Bond of All Sufficient Grace,
Bob Tolliver ---- (Rom 1:11-12)
Copyright May, 1999. All rights reserved.
If this letter has blessed you and you know of someone else who needs to
be encouraged, feel free to forward it in its entirety to all such people
you know.
If you would like a list of past issues which you could receive upon
request, just let us know.
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{ (O) (O) }
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Hang in there! I'm with you!
-------.ooooO--------------- Ooooo--------
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