Quote from Forum Archives on December 7, 2009, 11:43 am

Posted by: forthrightmag <forthrightmag@...>

Forthright Magazine
www.forthright.net
Straight to the Cross

COLUMN: FINAL PHASE

The Honeymoon's Over
by J. Randal Matheny, editor

In his book about forgiveness, Brazilian author
Hernandes Dias Lopes tells about a bride who made
detailed preparations for her honeymoon. On that
special night, she presented herself to her husband,
dressed all in silk.

Instead of the endearing terms and gesture of
tenderness she expected, he said, "You're dressed like
a prostitute!"

For 20 years that wife carried the wound of those
words. She never felt pleasure in her relationship
with her husband. Her bitterness led her into
adultery.

The lack of forgiveness produces resentment and
bitterness. In the fertile ground of forgiveness, love
grows.

"The one who forgives an offense seeks love, but
whoever repeats a matter separates close friends"
(Proverbs 17:9 NET).

Besides indicating, by its inclusion, the difficulty
of forgiveness, the Lord's prayer shows the
interdependence of our forgiveness and God's.

"and forgive us our debts, as we ourselves have
forgiven our debtors" (Matthew 6:12). Luke's rendering
makes it clear that debts refer to sins (Luke 11:4).

The more we understand the enormity of God's
forgiveness, the easier we will be able to forgive.

And God's continuing forgiveness of his people depends
upon their imitation of his disposition to forgive.

The love of God explodes any attempt to limit or
extend forgiveness on a human basis (Matthew 18:21-
22). While Peter thought seven pardons was a merciful
and gracious number, Jesus shows us that the forgiving
heart stops counting altogether.

Forgiveness trumps health (Matthew 9:2). Extended to
others, it must come "from the heart" (Matthew 18:35).

Forgiveness is the key to restoring and cultivating
relationships. The experience of God's salvation comes
"through the forgiveness of ... sins" (Luke 1:77).
Redemption is summed up as the forgiveness of sins
(Ephesians 1:7; Colossians 1:14). This is true in our
relationship to God, and to one another.

Failure to forgive, then, destroys relationships. Only
when we refuse to hold others' failings against them
will we be able to build lasting and intimate
relationships in the home, in the church and in the
world.

Because honeymoons end, sometimes, before they begin.

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