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When God Made Truck Drivers

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

I spent over 40 years on the road as a trucker so today we have devoted this page to the Christian truckers. Without them we would be in chaos as almost everything moves by truck. Many Christian men and women came across our paths as we travelled down the highways together. With my wife with me the last few years we met so many wonderful friends all over the United States and Canada. Today this page is dedicated to them.

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*** When God Made Truck Drivers ***

When the Lord was creating Truck Drivers, he was into his sixth day of overtime when an angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."
And the Lord said, "Have you read the spec on this order?"
" A truck driver has to be able to drive 10-12 hours per day, through any type of weather, on any type of road, know the highway traffic laws of 48 states and 10 provinces, he has to be ready and able to unload 40,000 lbs of cargo after driving thru the night, sleep in areas of cities and towns that the police refuse to patrol."
" He has to be able to live in his truck 24 hours a day 7 days a week for weeks on end, offer first aid and motorist assistance to his fellow travelers, meet just in time schedules, and still maintain an even and controlled composure when all around him appear to have gone mad."
" He has to be in top physical condition at all times, running on black coffee and half-eaten meals; he has to have six pairs of hands."
The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands... no way."
It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the Lord, "it's the three pairs of eyes a driver has to have."
"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel.
The Lord nodded.
" One pair that sees the herd of deer in the thickets 3 miles away" "Another pair here in the side of his head for the blind spots that motorists love to hide in; and another pair of eyes here in front that can look reassuringly at the bleeding victim of a drunk driver that crashed into his ICC bumper at 70MPH and say,
" ' You'll be all right ma'am,' when he knows it isn't so."
" Lord," said the angel, touching his sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow."
" I can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can drive 650 miles a day, without incident and can raise a family of five without ever seeing them, on 30 cents a mile."
The angel circled the model of the truck driver very slowly, "Can it think?" ,she asked.
"You bet," said the Lord. "It can tell you the elements of every HAZMAT load invented; recite Federal Motor Carrier Regulations rules and regs in its sleep; deliver, pickup, be a father, offer timely advice to strangers, search for missing children, defend a woman's or children's rights, get 8 hours of good rest on the street and raise a family of Law respecting citizens, without ever going home ... and still it keeps its sense of humor. "
"This driver also has phenomenal personal control. He can deal with delivery and pickup areas created from scenes painted in hell, coax a lumper to actually work for his money, comfort an accident victim's family, and then read in the daily paper how truck drivers are nothing more than killers on wheels and have no respect for the rights of others while using the nations highways."
Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the driver. "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model."
"That's not a leak," said the lord, "it's a tear."
"What's the tear for?" asked the angel.
"It's for bottled-up emotions, for fallen comrades, for commitment to that funny piece of cloth called the flag, for justice, for the family without its father."
"You're a genius," said the angel.
The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there."

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*** DEAR DISPATCHER ***

So you are about to ask why I delivered late? The reason for so doing, to you I can relate. I know that you hold the loads until they're hot, Then you want me to run there, tired or not.
For this Company, I will do all that I can, I only ask you to remember that I'm not SUPERMAN. When I get back into town, that very same day, You more often have a load for me to take away.
The orders for the load, you give them to me, Before my house, I have a chance to see. You seem to think, I have as my life's goal To be driving the highways alone and old.
That's not what I want, you should see, I need to spend time with my family. All work and no play, as you should really know, Makes Jack a dull boy, don't let romance grow.
Staying out there, running up and down the road, Makes a relationship go bad, rapidly erode. For the best way to get a good job done, Is to remember, that drivers also have to have fun.
After a few days of frolic and rest, He will get out there and run with the best. If you keep on turning him with loads that are hot, Delivery will be maybe, and maybe not.
CORDIALLY A TIRED DRIVER

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*** Ten Little Truckers ***

10 little truckers, cruising down the line - one had a heavy foot, and then there were nine;

9 little truckers, the hour getting late - one dozed a moment, and then there were eight;

8 little truckers, the evening seemed heaven - one showed his driving skills, and then there were seven;

7 little truckers, their lives full of kicks - one bought a bottle, and then there were six,

6 little truckers, impatient to arrive - one jumped a traffic light, and then there were five;

5 little truckers, wheeling near the shore - one viewed the scenery, and then there were four;

4 little truckers, happy as could be - one passed on a hill, and then there were three;

3 little truckers, busy, it is true - one neglected truck repairs, and then there were two;

2 little truckers, and the day nearly done - one didn't dim his lights and then there was one;

1 little trucker, who's still alive today - by following the safety rules, he hopes to stay that way!

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*** Ode To A Truck Driver ***

He's a big guy...He's a small guy. He come in all sizes and shapes...Short, tall, skinny and fat...
Laughing, serious, happy and sad.
He's transportation with a grin on his face...
Distribution with a cocked left eyebrow...
He's progress with diesel fumes in his hair.
He makes his living holding 40 tons of steel in his hands...He has highways in his eyes.
He's a truck driver!
He hauls milk for the nation's babies, dresses for the nation's ladies...Steel for our country's defense...and bread for the nation's breakfast tables.
He likes straight highways...Blonde waitresses...Slot machines that pay off...Friendly cops...and bonus checks.
The road's his home...He drives today so the world can live tomorrow...
Laughing, cocky, husky, he's tough enough to hold his cargo against a hurricane...
And gentle enough to stop 40 tons of wheeled steel...to let a 12-ounce kitten cross the road...
He can tell you where to get the best piece of apple pie on the highway...and where the radar traps are, and which roads to take to make the fastest time...
He hates, in the order named, phonies, roadhogs, tough traffic cops, highway weight stations, small-town justices of the peace...Steep hills...Cackling cargo...and weak coffee.
He's America on wheels...He's big business with a road map in his pocket...
He's a truck driver...
Without him, there would be no gasoline to run the nation's automobiles...No steel to make the machines, no concrete to build the highways...No merchandise to spin the wheels of trade.
Born 200 years ago, he would have been a buccaneer, a privateer, a freebootin' soldier of fortune.
Born 100 years ago, he would have been a frontier scout, a stagecoach driver...a rider of the Pony Express.
He has eyes that look over mountains,...He likes to see the other side of hills...
He eats better than a banker, dresses like a Texas rancher, is more independent then a newly-elected senator...
He's an authority on politics, women, high-way construction, baseball...and the best way to run a trucking company.
He likes the feel of the night wind on his face and the sound of a purring engine...
He lives by the code of the road...and passes no man by who needs a helping hand.
He's got problems, and is not bashful in airing complaints about the state of the world at large...
And every trip he threatens to get off the road and live like other men...
But he never does...Because the highway is a flirting Lorelei who hums a haunting tune for the men who chase the horizon on spinning wheels...
And when the tires sing...and the road is straight...and the moon is bright on a ribbon of cross-country highway, he's the happiest, most useful man in America...
He's a truck driver!

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara

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