A Grave Error
Posted by: <@...>
A young preacher was contacted by the local funeral director to hold a
graveside committal service at a small local cemetery for someone with no
family or friends.
The preacher started early but quickly got himself lost, making several
wrong turns.
He arrived a half-hour late, the hearse was nowhere in sight, and the
workmen were eating lunch.
The pastor went to the open grave and found the vault lid already in
place.
Taking out his book, he read the service.
As he was returning to his car, he overheard one of the workmen say:
"Maybe we'd better tell him it's a septictank."
BONUS JOKE
A Death Row Courtesy
An inmate on death row in Texas was scheduled to be put to death by lethal
injection the following day.
Throughout the day, the prison guards were being very nice to the man, but
when they asked him if he wanted something specific for his last meal, he
replied that he didn't want anything special.
When they asked if there was something special he wanted to do, he said
that there was nothing special that he wanted to do.
It went on like this all day.
Finally, when he was strapped down for execution, the guard asked the man
if he wanted a cigarette.
"No," the inmate said, "just get it over with."
"Well, is there anything that I can do for you before you go?" said the
guard. "You didn't even want a special last meal!"
The inmate thought. "Actually," he said, "Music is my life. One thing I
would really like would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time
through, with no interruptions."
The guard nodded and told him to go ahead.
The inmate started, "One billion bottles of beer on the wall..."
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"In my experience, the best creative work is never done when one
is unhappy," Albert Einstein said