For the gospel does not expressly demand works of our own by which we become righteous and are saved; indeed it condemns such works. Rather the gospel demands faith in Christ: that He has overcome for us sin, death, and hell, and thus gives us righteousness, life, and salvation not through our works, but through His own works, death, and suffering, in order that we may avail ourselves of His death and victory as though we has done it ourselves.
Martin Luther

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"Ambitious" Thursday

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#1 · April 20, 2006, 4:31 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Ambitious"
 
 
I was driving down a back country road out in the boonies, when I came
across a farmer standing in the middle of a huge cornfield that had
apparently recently been harvested.
 
I was curious as to what he was doing so I pulled my car over to the
side of the road and watched this guy just standing there like a human
scarecrow, silently doing nothing, motionless, looking at nothing.
 
I thought maybe it was some new type of Farmer's Zen
therapy or somethin' so I got out of the car, walked all the way out to
the farmer and asked him,
"Ah excuse me sir, but I'm curious as to just what are you doing?"
 
The farmer replied,  "Well it's between harvest and plantin' and since
I've the time to spare,  I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
 
"How do you plan on accomplishing that ?" I asked the man,
completely puzzled.
 
"Well I heard on a TV program the other day that they give the Nobel
Prize . . . to people who are out standing in their field."
 
 
"Maybe"
 
 
A large drug store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer, "No,
ma'am, we haven't had any for some weeks now, and it doesn't look as if
we'll be getting any very soon either."
 
Alarmed by what was being said, the manager rushed over to the customer
who was walking out the door and said, "That isn't true, ma'am. Of
course, we'll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for it a
couple of weeks ago."
 
Then the manager drew the clerk aside and growled, "Never, never, ever
say we don't have something. If we don't have it, say we ordered it and
it's on its way.
 
Now, what was it she asked about?" And the clerk said, "She asked me if
I thought it was gonna rain."
 
"Police Stop"
 
 
On a street, where the speed is limited to 30 mph
the police stop a driver.
 
"Not only have you been driving too fast, you've
been passing cars where it is not allowed.  Your
lights don't work, your tires all completely worn out.
This is surely going to cost you a lot.  What's your
name?"
 
"Schtrathewisizeski Vocgefastilongchinic", replied
the foreign driver.
 
"Well, I'll let you go this time but don't do it again."
 
 
 
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
 
 
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