Bargain

#1 · March 23, 2004, 6:28 am

Quote from Forum Archives on March 23, 2004, 6:28 am
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
Bargain

A travel agent said to his customer, "I can get you three days and
two nights in Rome for a hundred bucks."

"How come so cheap?" replied the customer.

The travel agent told him, "The days are July 11, 12 and 13. The
nights are July 21 and 22."

Frozen Turkey Loaf

A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears.

She sobs, "Robert doesn't appreciate what I do for him!"

"Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding."

"No, mother," the young woman laments. "I bought a frozen turkey loaf and he yelled at me about the price."

"Well, that is being miserly," the mother agreed, "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars."

"No, mother it wasn't the price of the turkey roll, it was the airplane ticket."

"Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?"

"Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the back and it said, 'PREPARE FROM A FROZEN STATE,' so I flew to Alaska."

Murphy's Laws For Frequent Flyers

1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and
need the delay to make the flight.

2.If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the
farthest gate within the terminal.

3.If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be
delayed.

4.Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.

5.If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence
as soon as you touch pen to paper.

6.If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the
seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the
boarding area. Just look for the two largest passengers.

7.Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go
to the lavatory.

8.The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to
you.

9.Guys, the best-looking woman on your flight is never seated next
to you.

10.The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the
more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

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Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

Bargain

A travel agent said to his customer, "I can get you three days and
two nights in Rome for a hundred bucks."

"How come so cheap?" replied the customer.

The travel agent told him, "The days are July 11, 12 and 13. The
nights are July 21 and 22."

Frozen Turkey Loaf

A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears.

She sobs, "Robert doesn't appreciate what I do for him!"

"Now, now," her mother comforted, "I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding."

"No, mother," the young woman laments. "I bought a frozen turkey loaf and he yelled at me about the price."

"Well, that is being miserly," the mother agreed, "Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars."

"No, mother it wasn't the price of the turkey roll, it was the airplane ticket."

"Airplane ticket.... What did you need an airplane ticket for?"

"Well mother, when I went to fix it, I looked at the directions on the back and it said, 'PREPARE FROM A FROZEN STATE,' so I flew to Alaska."

Murphy's Laws For Frequent Flyers

1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and
need the delay to make the flight.

2.If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the
farthest gate within the terminal.

3.If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be
delayed.

4.Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.

5.If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence
as soon as you touch pen to paper.

6.If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the
seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the
boarding area. Just look for the two largest passengers.

7.Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go
to the lavatory.

8.The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to
you.

9.Guys, the best-looking woman on your flight is never seated next
to you.

10.The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the
more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

Necessary Legal Information

I do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from me it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than me, has forwarded it to you.

Normal Subscribe:	clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org
Normal Unsubscribe:	clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org

Web Subscribe:	clean-hewmor-allow-subscribe@welovegod.org
Web Unsubscribe:	clean-hewmor-allow-unsubscribe@welovegod.org

Email Group Owner:	clean-hewmor-owner@welovegod.org

  Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute.  Please take  a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh!  --  To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org  To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>