Cat Baptism
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
A little son of a Baptist minister was in church one morning when he saw for the first time the rite of baptism by immersion. He was greatly interested in it, and the next morning proceeded to baptize his three cats in the bathtub.
The first kitten bore it very well, and so did the young cat, but the old family cat rebelled. It struggled, clawed and tore at him, and got away.
With considerable effort he caught it again and proceeded with the ceremony, but she acted worse than ever, clawed at him, spit, and scratched his hands and face.
Finally, after barely getting her splattered with water, he dropped her on the floor in disgust and said: "Fine, be an Atheist."
Biblical Bumper Snickers
Adam: "You are what you eat."
Eve: "At least he doesn't compare me to his mother."
Abraham: "I'm goin' not knowin'. "
Noah: "Honk if you believe in treading water."
Moses: "From a basket case to the promise land."
Elizah: "When Jezebel ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."
Balaam: "My second donkey talks!"
Prodigal Son: "All roads lead to home."
At the Sinai desert: "Winding road next 40 years"
At the Red Sea: "Caution! Subject to sudden flooding"
Hymns For The 40+ Crowd
Just A 'Slower'
Walk With Thee"
-
"It Is Well With My Soul",
But My Knees Hurt
-
"Nobody Knows
The Trouble I 'Have Seeing'"
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"Precious Lord, Take My Hand",
And Help Me Up
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"Count Your Many 'Birthdays',
Count Them One By One"
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"Go Tell It On A Mountain"
, But Speak Up
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"Give Me The Old 'Timers' Religion"
-
"Blessed 'Insurance'"
"Guide Me O Thou Great Lord God"
I've Forgotten
Where I've Parked The Car
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
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