Cookie Recipe for Cat Lovers Wednesday
Quote from Forum Archives on October 5, 2004, 7:37 pmPosted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
"Cookie Recipe For Cat Lovers"1 Look in cookbook for cookie recipe.
2 Get cup of coffee.
3 Get cat off of cookbook.
4 Find that special recipe.
5 Get cat's nose out of coffee mug.
6 Go to fridge and get eggs.
7 Get dry ingredients from cupboard.
8 Break eggs in small bowl.
9 Sift dry ingredients into a large bowl.
10 Answer the phone.
11 Cat ate eggs; get more from fridge.
12 Get cat out of flour bowl and dust cat off.
13 Get Band-Aids for scratches on hands.
14 Throw flour out and get more.
15 Preheat oven for cookies.
16 Glare at cat with desire to bake cat now.
17 Watch cat run for cover into bathroom.
18 Flour the counter to roll out cookie dough.
19 Run to bathroom to investigate loud crashing sound.
20 Cat has toilet paper all over floor and your personal bathroom things have been knocked over on top of the counter.
21 Yell at cat. Cat falls in toilet bowl.
22 Take cat out of toilet to dry cat off.
23 Get bandages to cover more scratches on arms and legs.
24 Clean up bathroom.
25 Run to kitchen to see what cat is doing now.
26 Get cat off floured counter in kitchen.
27 Try to pick cat hairs out of flour.
28 Step on cat's tail and get bitten in ankle.
29 Get coat, car keys, cat, and drive to store to buy cookies.
30 Squeeze cat through partially open window into a stranger's car at the store parking lot.
31 Eat most of the cookies on the way home."Bumped Car"A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and considerable damage to the hood. There's no sign of the offending vehicle but he's relieved to see that there's a note stuck under the windshield wiper."Sorry. I just backed into your Beemer. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding and smiling at me because they think I'm leaving my name, address and other particulars. But I'm not. Cya!"
"For Sale"My friend wanted a boat more than anything. His wife
kept refusing, but he bought one anyway."I'll tell you what," he told her. "In the spirit of
compromise, why don't you name the boat?"Being a good sport, she accepted. When her husband
went to the dock for his maiden voyage, this is the
name he saw painted on the side: "For Sale."Have a Blessed DayDave and BarbaraNecessary Legal InformationI do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from me it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than me, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
1 Look in cookbook for cookie recipe.
2 Get cup of coffee.
3 Get cat off of cookbook.
4 Find that special recipe.
5 Get cat's nose out of coffee mug.
6 Go to fridge and get eggs.
7 Get dry ingredients from cupboard.
8 Break eggs in small bowl.
9 Sift dry ingredients into a large bowl.
10 Answer the phone.
11 Cat ate eggs; get more from fridge.
12 Get cat out of flour bowl and dust cat off.
13 Get Band-Aids for scratches on hands.
14 Throw flour out and get more.
15 Preheat oven for cookies.
16 Glare at cat with desire to bake cat now.
17 Watch cat run for cover into bathroom.
18 Flour the counter to roll out cookie dough.
19 Run to bathroom to investigate loud crashing sound.
20 Cat has toilet paper all over floor and your personal bathroom things have been knocked over on top of the counter.
21 Yell at cat. Cat falls in toilet bowl.
22 Take cat out of toilet to dry cat off.
23 Get bandages to cover more scratches on arms and legs.
24 Clean up bathroom.
25 Run to kitchen to see what cat is doing now.
26 Get cat off floured counter in kitchen.
27 Try to pick cat hairs out of flour.
28 Step on cat's tail and get bitten in ankle.
29 Get coat, car keys, cat, and drive to store to buy cookies.
30 Squeeze cat through partially open window into a stranger's car at the store parking lot.
31 Eat most of the cookies on the way home.
"Sorry. I just backed into your Beemer. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding and smiling at me because they think I'm leaving my name, address and other particulars. But I'm not. Cya!"
kept refusing, but he bought one anyway.
"I'll tell you what," he told her. "In the spirit of
compromise, why don't you name the boat?"
Being a good sport, she accepted. When her husband
went to the dock for his maiden voyage, this is the
name he saw painted on the side: "For Sale."
I do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from me it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than me, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>