Quote from Forum Archives on June 28, 2006, 9:31 am

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Flight Fear"

 

 

Our co-worker kept trying to get her mother to fly out for a visit. "No way am I getting on an airplane," was the inevitable answer.
"Look, Mom, when it's your time to go, it doesn't matter if you're on the ground or in the air."

 

"I know," said her mother. "I just don't want to be that far off the ground when it's the pilot's time to go."

 

"Entitled"

 

 

There was a notice in my mailbox that required me to go
to court as a witness against someone whose name I did
not recognize.  Calling for more information, I found out
that my notice was for reporting a driver who had illegally
passed my stopped school bus---ten years ago when I had
been driving a bus part time.

 

The appearance date was the same time as my night class,
so I called to see if my court appearance could be rescheduled.

 

Two days later someone returned my call.  "We cannot push
the date back," I was told.  The reason?  "The accused is
entitled to a speedy trial."

 

 

"The New Alphabet"

 

 

A is for Apple, and
B is for Boat,
  That used to be right, but now it won't float!   Age before Beauty is what we once said,   But let's be a bit more realistic instead. NOW,

 

A is for arthritis;
B is the bad back,
C is the chest pains, perhaps cardiac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!
F is for fissures and fluid retention,
G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure--I'd rather it low;
.I for incisions with scars you can show.
J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,
K is for knees that crack when they bend.
L for libido, what happened ?
M is for memory, I forget what comes next
N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;
O is for osteo, the bones that don't grow!
P for prescription's, I have quite a few,
...Just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?
R for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T for Tinnitus; there's bells in my ears!
U is for urinary; big troubles with flow;
V is for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.
W is for worry, NOW what's going 'round?
X is for X ray, and what might be found.
Y is another year I'm left here behind,
Z is for zest that I still have-- in my mind.

 

I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, and I've kept twenty-six doctors fully employed!!!.

 

 

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara

 

 

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