Grumbling At The Table
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
A man had a habit of grumbling at
the food his wife placed before him at
family meals. Then he would ask
the blessing. One day after his usual
combination complaint-prayer,
his little girl asked, "Daddy, does God
hear us when we pray?"
"Why, of course," he replied.
"He hears us every time we pray."
She waited a moment, and asked,
"Does he hear everything we say the
rest of the time?"
"Yes, dear, every word,"
he replied, encouraged that he had
inspired his daughter to be curious
about spiritual matters.
However, his pride was quickly turned
to humility when she asked,
"Then which does God believe?"
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~
~**~ Oh Nuts! ~**~
Two boy scouts went on a nature hike in the hills picking hickory nuts. Along the way, they filled their small pails and then started to fill their pockets and shirts.
When they could hold no more nuts, they started down the country road until they came across a cemetery. The boys decided that would be a good place to stop and rest and divide out the nuts.
The two boys sat in the shade of a large oak tree and unloaded their pockets and buckets by dumping all of the nuts in a large pile.
In the process, two of them rolled away and rested near the road. The boys then proceeded to divide out the nuts. "One for you. One for me. One for you. One for me."
As they were doing this, another boy was passing by and happened to hear them. He looked into the cemetery, but could not see the boys, because they were obscured by the tree. He hesitated a moment and then ran back to town.
"Father! Father!" he yelled as he entered his house.
"The cemetery. Come quick!"
"What's the matter?" his father asked.
"No time to explain," the boy frantically panted. "Follow me!"
The boy and his father ran up the country road and stopped when they reached the cemetery. They stopped at the side of the road and all fell silent for a few moments. Then the father asked his son what was wrong.
"Do you hear that?" he whispered. Both people listened intently and heard the Scouts. "One for me. One for you. One for me. One for you..."
The boy then blurted out, "The devil and the Lord are dividing the souls!"
The father was skeptical but silent -- until a few moments later as the Scouts completed dividing out the nuts and one Scout said to the other, "Now, as soon as we get those two nuts down by the road, we'll have them all."
They say the father made it back to town 5 minutes before the boy!
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~
~**~ Helping Little Johnny ~**~
A preacher is walking down the street one day when he notices our Little Johnny trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.
However, Little Johnny is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach.
After watching Little Johnny efforts for some time, the preacher moves closer to the boy's position.
He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a sold ring. Crouching down to the child's level, the preacher smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?
" To which Little Johnny replies, "Now we run!"
~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~**~
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
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