Quote from Forum Archives on April 18, 2005, 2:24 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Having a Bad Day"

 

 

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the
Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $ 80,000.00. At a
special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals
were being released back into the wild amid cheers and
applause from onlookers.

 

A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them
both.

 

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

 

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen
shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind
of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she
whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in
two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening
to his Walkman.

 

STILL think you're having a Bad Day????

 

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty
of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany.
Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through
a broken fence, stampeding madly.

 

The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

 

What?? STILL having a Bad Day????

 

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage
on a letter bomb. It came back with "Return to Sender"
stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and
was blown to bits.

 

There now, feeling better????

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"A Little Mixed Up" 

Just a line to say I'm living,
That I'm not among the dead.
Though I'm getting more forgetful
And more mixed up in the head.

 

For sometimes I can't remember,
When I stand at foot of stairs,
If I must go up for something,
Or if I've just come down from there.

 

And before the fridge so often
My poor mind is filled with doubt
Have I just put food away?...or
Have I come to take some out?

 

And there's times when it is dark out,
With my night cap on my head
I don't know if I'm retiring
Or just getting out of bed.

 

So...if it's my turn to write you
There's no need of getting sore,
I may think that I have written
And don't want to be a bore!!

 

So, remember..I do love you
And I wish that you were here,
But now it's nearly mail time,
So I must say good-bye my dear.

 

There I stood beside the mail box
With a face so very red
Instead of mailing you my letter,
I had opened it instead!!

 

My bifocals fit - my dentures are fine
My hearing aid works...but ..I do miss my mind!!!
Author Unknown
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

"Oops"

 

At Andersen Air Force Base, Guam, a man in civilian clothes approached an airman and requested a vehicle pass.

 

The young airman, fresh out of technical training, asked to see his military ID, driver's license and his vehicle registration.

 

Noticing the letters BG on the man's identification, the new airman asked, "What's BG stand for -- Big Guy?"

 

"No," the man replied, leaning over the counter... "Try Brigadier General."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

"A happy heart is like good medicine" (Proverbs 17:22)

 

 

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara

     

            

 

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