HOPE4KYIV ---- QUICK UPDATE -- 11/3/03

#1 · November 3, 2004, 4:33 am

Quote from Forum Archives on November 3, 2004, 4:33 am
Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>
Dear Friends:

We've been trying to get an update on Nicole Grace out for some time, but have just been swamped. Her improvement of weight and strength have been steady. However, the physical conditions and the emotional drain on the family remain the same.

+ We are heading back to the States in less than 18 hours, where we will remain until December 29th when we return to Kiev. We have many speaking engagements, mostly in the Midwest.

Our current speaking schedule looks like this:

Nov 07a -- Available in easy driving distance to Collins.

Nov 07p -- Available in easy driving distance to Collins.

Nov 09 -- Midwestern Seminary, KC

Nov 14a -- Fellowship Baptist Church, Nevada, MO

Nov 14p -- FBC, Windsor, MO

Nov 15 -- 6:00 pm -- SHBC Bolivar, MO

Nov 16 -- SBU, Bolivar, MO -- Dr. Jim Frost classes

Nov 21a -- FBC, Dadeville, MO

Nov 21p -- Available within driving distance of Collins (1 to 2 hours max)

Nov 24 -- LaGrange, MO Available around Hannibal/LaGrange

Nov 28a -- FBC, LaGrange, MO

Nov 28p -- Southern Baptist Fellowship, Wayland, MO

Nov 29-30 -- Available anywhere

Dec 01 -- FBC, Eldon, MO

Dec 04 -- SBU, Bolivar, MO (Missions Teams' Training)

Dec 5a -- FBC, Eldorado Springs, MO

Dec 5p -- FBC, Clever, MO

Dec 08 -- FBC, Lamoni, IA

Dec 12a -- New Hope Baptist Church, Sedalia, MO

Dec 18p -- Singles Christmas Dinner, FBC, O'Fallon, MO

Other meetings are pending. If you are able to attend one of these meetings, please drop us a note and ask us about details.

+ The elections in Ukraine were characterized again by the typical heavy handedness, intimidation, and violations of law that have characterized this region for many years. Out of 24 presidential candidates, the two expected to gain the greatest support did just that. However, because neither one gained 50% of the total vote, a run off election is scheduled for the 21st of this month. This election will, for all practical purposes, set the course of the nation for the next many years. It will certainly shift either more toward Russia or it will move westward toward the EU, NATO, and North America.

We've heard many stories already of names not being on the voter registration list, villagers being intimidated, double ballots cast, dead people voting, and so forth. Democracy always is accompanied by strong birth pains, but it also takes years for it to learn to sit up, stand up, and finally walk. It was the same in the U.S. nearly 250 years ago as the process was conceived and then born. It needs help to grow and mature. Unfortunately, too many people walk away, leaving it to flounder.

+ Following are excerpts from Deanna's latest update in Nicole Grace. It's amazing how she is growing, but her condition is still disconcerting. As you read the letter, you'll realize just what a heavy toll the "unknown" can play on a family. That makes it all the more important that faith generates contentment, and intercession creates undergirding support and encouragement. Please don't forget to drop Jim and Deanna a note from time to time. Again, their e-mail is prov2525@socket.net.

--------------

Hello all!

We are pleased to announce that we now have a 10 ½ pounder. She gained over an ounce a day between doctor visits - and is tolerating the increased fluid/lower calorie per ounce feedings. She's all the way up to 70 mls. Per feeding. She still has issues with constipation, but not as much fussiness. Her biggest deal, right now (seems to change weekly!) is the spitting up. She sneezes and/or yawns deeply and it is almost always immediately followed by spitting up. If we can get her upright quick enough, she manages to keep the contents down or at least reduced in amount. It's gotten much more frequent - at least 4 times a day, sometimes more. Sneezing and yawning, like hiccups, are all mostly reflex at this age. Hopefully, she'll grow out of it as well as the reflux.

To be honest, it has been emotionally draining again for the past several days. The daily grind of caring for an infant that you can't hold the way you want to, feed the way you want to, and who is fussy about 70% of the time she's awake (which is still only a few hours total a day) combined with the fact that there is no relational type of response from her, makes it seem hopeless and futile. It is not, we know, . . . but again, emotions often take a long time to catch up with faith.

The unknown length of this routine", which could be months or years with no indicator of when things will change, makes the "feeling trapped" scenario rather suffocating at times. It's not so much being frustrated about not being able to go do "whatever" today; rather it's the agonizing thought/realization that it may be years before we are able to go do "whatever".

When the other children were young, and still to some extent now, there were times of feeling trapped by their needs for feedings, diaper changes, bed times, etc. However, they were growing and developing on a daily and noticeable basis, so we knew whatever stage they were in would soon pass and we'd be more free to do
"whatever" we were missing out on at the time. We have no guarantee of that "future release" with Nicole.

Then you always have in the back of your mind the realization that the only way a "normal" life will return will be if God miraculously heals her instantly or over time OR that He'll take her home. As Jim has mentioned before, in a lot of ways, we're more afraid of her living long-term the way she is now (with no responsiveness) than we are of her dying. Somewhere in all that, guilt comes in on various levels because it all feels selfish. I, at least, have not yet reached a conclusion on how to deal with all that yet. Again, faith is one thing - it has not wavered; however, the emotional toll seems endless at times. So, it has been a draining last several days.

We have an urgent prayer request regarding Evan. He is back at children's hospital in St. Louis with pneumonia. His heart is doing fine thus far. Mainly his lungs were stiff from being on the respirator so long. They hope he can be released later this week.

Also remember my folks, Bob and Jo Ann Tolliver, who will be heading home from Kiev on Thursday. My sister and her family, the Elders, will return to Colombia, South America next week. After seeing them off in Kansas City, my folks will drive over to see Nicole (and the rest of us).

. . . . we still KNOW that God is faithful, that His love is unfailing, that His provision is more than sufficient for EVERY need. Our emotions don't have to experience it for our hearts to KNOW it is so.

-------------------------

Next few times we write, we'll be in the States.

Thanks again for your incredible encouragement and support to us.

In His Bond and For His Kingdom,

Bob and Jo Ann

Bob Tolliver
lifeunlimited@pobox.com
http://www.hope4kiev.org/team/members.asp?ID=10
http://community.webshots.com/user/01lum
http://www.praykiev.org
  --  To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: hope4kyiv-unsubscribe@welovegod.org  

Posted by: lifeunlimited <lifeunlimited@...>

Dear Friends:

We've been trying to get an update on Nicole Grace out for some time, but have just been swamped. Her improvement of weight and strength have been steady. However, the physical conditions and the emotional drain on the family remain the same.

+ We are heading back to the States in less than 18 hours, where we will remain until December 29th when we return to Kiev. We have many speaking engagements, mostly in the Midwest.

Our current speaking schedule looks like this:

Nov 07a -- Available in easy driving distance to Collins.

Nov 07p -- Available in easy driving distance to Collins.

Nov 09 -- Midwestern Seminary, KC

Nov 14a -- Fellowship Baptist Church, Nevada, MO

Nov 14p -- FBC, Windsor, MO

Nov 15 -- 6:00 pm -- SHBC Bolivar, MO

Nov 16 -- SBU, Bolivar, MO -- Dr. Jim Frost classes

Nov 21a -- FBC, Dadeville, MO

Nov 21p -- Available within driving distance of Collins (1 to 2 hours max)

Nov 24 -- LaGrange, MO Available around Hannibal/LaGrange

Nov 28a -- FBC, LaGrange, MO

Nov 28p -- Southern Baptist Fellowship, Wayland, MO

Nov 29-30 -- Available anywhere

Dec 01 -- FBC, Eldon, MO

Dec 04 -- SBU, Bolivar, MO (Missions Teams' Training)

Dec 5a -- FBC, Eldorado Springs, MO

Dec 5p -- FBC, Clever, MO

Dec 08 -- FBC, Lamoni, IA

Dec 12a -- New Hope Baptist Church, Sedalia, MO

Dec 18p -- Singles Christmas Dinner, FBC, O'Fallon, MO

Other meetings are pending. If you are able to attend one of these meetings, please drop us a note and ask us about details.

+ The elections in Ukraine were characterized again by the typical heavy handedness, intimidation, and violations of law that have characterized this region for many years. Out of 24 presidential candidates, the two expected to gain the greatest support did just that. However, because neither one gained 50% of the total vote, a run off election is scheduled for the 21st of this month. This election will, for all practical purposes, set the course of the nation for the next many years. It will certainly shift either more toward Russia or it will move westward toward the EU, NATO, and North America.

We've heard many stories already of names not being on the voter registration list, villagers being intimidated, double ballots cast, dead people voting, and so forth. Democracy always is accompanied by strong birth pains, but it also takes years for it to learn to sit up, stand up, and finally walk. It was the same in the U.S. nearly 250 years ago as the process was conceived and then born. It needs help to grow and mature. Unfortunately, too many people walk away, leaving it to flounder.

+ Following are excerpts from Deanna's latest update in Nicole Grace. It's amazing how she is growing, but her condition is still disconcerting. As you read the letter, you'll realize just what a heavy toll the "unknown" can play on a family. That makes it all the more important that faith generates contentment, and intercession creates undergirding support and encouragement. Please don't forget to drop Jim and Deanna a note from time to time. Again, their e-mail is prov2525@socket.net.

--------------

Hello all!

We are pleased to announce that we now have a 10 ½ pounder. She gained over an ounce a day between doctor visits - and is tolerating the increased fluid/lower calorie per ounce feedings. She's all the way up to 70 mls. Per feeding. She still has issues with constipation, but not as much fussiness. Her biggest deal, right now (seems to change weekly!) is the spitting up. She sneezes and/or yawns deeply and it is almost always immediately followed by spitting up. If we can get her upright quick enough, she manages to keep the contents down or at least reduced in amount. It's gotten much more frequent - at least 4 times a day, sometimes more. Sneezing and yawning, like hiccups, are all mostly reflex at this age. Hopefully, she'll grow out of it as well as the reflux.

To be honest, it has been emotionally draining again for the past several days. The daily grind of caring for an infant that you can't hold the way you want to, feed the way you want to, and who is fussy about 70% of the time she's awake (which is still only a few hours total a day) combined with the fact that there is no relational type of response from her, makes it seem hopeless and futile. It is not, we know, . . . but again, emotions often take a long time to catch up with faith.

The unknown length of this routine", which could be months or years with no indicator of when things will change, makes the "feeling trapped" scenario rather suffocating at times. It's not so much being frustrated about not being able to go do "whatever" today; rather it's the agonizing thought/realization that it may be years before we are able to go do "whatever".

When the other children were young, and still to some extent now, there were times of feeling trapped by their needs for feedings, diaper changes, bed times, etc. However, they were growing and developing on a daily and noticeable basis, so we knew whatever stage they were in would soon pass and we'd be more free to do
"whatever" we were missing out on at the time. We have no guarantee of that "future release" with Nicole.

Then you always have in the back of your mind the realization that the only way a "normal" life will return will be if God miraculously heals her instantly or over time OR that He'll take her home. As Jim has mentioned before, in a lot of ways, we're more afraid of her living long-term the way she is now (with no responsiveness) than we are of her dying. Somewhere in all that, guilt comes in on various levels because it all feels selfish. I, at least, have not yet reached a conclusion on how to deal with all that yet. Again, faith is one thing - it has not wavered; however, the emotional toll seems endless at times. So, it has been a draining last several days.

We have an urgent prayer request regarding Evan. He is back at children's hospital in St. Louis with pneumonia. His heart is doing fine thus far. Mainly his lungs were stiff from being on the respirator so long. They hope he can be released later this week.

Also remember my folks, Bob and Jo Ann Tolliver, who will be heading home from Kiev on Thursday. My sister and her family, the Elders, will return to Colombia, South America next week. After seeing them off in Kansas City, my folks will drive over to see Nicole (and the rest of us).

. . . . we still KNOW that God is faithful, that His love is unfailing, that His provision is more than sufficient for EVERY need. Our emotions don't have to experience it for our hearts to KNOW it is so.

-------------------------

Next few times we write, we'll be in the States.

Thanks again for your incredible encouragement and support to us.

In His Bond and For His Kingdom,

Bob and Jo Ann

Bob Tolliver
lifeunlimited@pobox.com
http://www.hope4kiev.org/team/members.asp?ID=10
http://community.webshots.com/user/01lum
http://www.praykiev.org

  --  To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: hope4kyiv-unsubscribe@welovegod.org