I'm dead
Posted by: root <root@...>
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An older husband and wife are in bed one morning.
He takes her hand and she says: "Don't touch me."
He says, "Why not?"
She answers, "Because I'm dead."
Husband says, "What are you talking about? We're lying here
talking to one another."
The wife says, "No, I'm definitely dead."
Her husband insists: "You're not dead. What makes you think
you're dead?"
His wife answers: "I know I'm dead because I woke up this morning
and nothing hurts."
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Redemy for Weight Gain
======================
A man was showing his friend a new set of matched golf clubs he had just
bought.
"Doctor's orders," the man told his friend. "My wife and I have been
gaining too much
weight and we went to see the doctor about it. He said we needed more
exercise,
so I joined the country club and bought myself this set of golf clubs."
"What about your wife?" the friend asked. "What did you buy her?"
"A new lawn mower," the golfer said.
THOUGHT OF THE DAY
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Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
- Abraham Lincoln