Quote from Forum Archives on June 16, 2004, 9:39 pm

Posted by: Bigguyhereagain <Bigguyhereagain@...>

 

 

 

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Thank you Dave and Barbara

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Is It Raining

 

 

A flight attendant was on the red-eye to Manila when a
water leak developed in the galley, which eventually
soaked the carpet throughout the cabin of the 747.

A very sleepy passenger who had become aware of the
dampness asked the attendant, "Has it been raining?"

Keeping a straight face, the attendant replied, "Yes,
but we put the top up."

With a sigh of relief, the passenger went back to
sleep.

 

 

Autos

 

[I feel sure that, like me, you have always assumed autos to be a modern invention. But a Biblical scholar now demonstrates that cars were existent from the earliest Biblical times.]

--Plymouth:
"God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in
a Fury." (Genesis)

--Pontiac and a Geo:
"Pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify
them with your Storm." (Psalm 83)

--Dodge pickup truck:
Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain
"until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast." (Exodus 19)

--Honda:
Jesus tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own
Accord . . ." (John 12)
"The Apostles were in one Accord."

--British Triumph:
"The roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the hills." And. . .
"Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land."

Abbott and Costello Meet Windows

Costello: Hey, Abbot!
Abbott: Yes, Lou?

Costello: I just got my first computer.
Abbott: That's great Lou. What did you get?

Costello: A Pentium 4-3.04, with 512 Megs of RAM, a 120.1 Gig hard drive,
and a 52X CD-ROM.
Abbott: That's terrific, Lou.

Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!
Abbott: You will in time.

Costello: That's exactly why I am here to see you.
Abbott: Oh?

Costello: I heard that you are a real computer expert.
Abbott: Well, I don't know-

Costello: Yes-sir-ee. You know your stuff. And you're going to train
me.
Abbott: Really?

Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.
Abbott: O.K. Lou. What do want to know?

Costello: I am having no problem turning it on, but I heard that you
should be very careful how you turn it off.
Abbott: That's true.

Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want to turn
it off. What do I do?
Abbott: Well, first you press the Start button, and then-

Costello: No, I told you, I want to turn it off.
Abbot: I know, you press the Start button-

Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it Off. I know how to start
it. So tell me what to do.
Abbott: I did.

Costello: When?
Abbott: When I told you to press the Start button.

Costello: Why should I press the Start button?
Abbott: To shut off the computer.

Costello: I press Start to stop.
Abbott: Well Start doesn't actually stop the computer.

Costello: I knew it! So what do I press?
Abbott: Start.

Costello: Start what?
Abbott: Start button.

Costello: Start button to do what?
Abbott: Shut down.

Costello: You don't have to get rude!
Abbott: No, no, no! That's not what I meant.

Costello: Then say what you mean.
Abbott: To shut down the computer, press-

Costello: Don't say, "Start!"
Abbott: Then what do you want me to say?

Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to
press the Stop button, the End button and Cease and Desist button, but
no one in their right mind presses the Start to Stop.
Abbott: But that's what you do.

Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.
Abbott: Don't be ridiculous.

Costello: I'm being ridiculous? Well. I think it's about time we
started this conversation.
Abbott: What are you talking about?

Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

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