Quote from Forum Archives on October 29, 2004, 1:30 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Lost Bible"

 

 

The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending
fences out on the range.

 

Three weeks later a cow walked up carrying the Bible in it's
mouth.

 

The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes.

 

He took the book out of the cow's mouth, raised his eyes
heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"

 

"Not really," said the cow.  "Your name was written inside
the cover."

 

  

 

"Are you BRAVE enough to take the Internet pledge!! "

 

1)  I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web. 

 

2)  I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing. 

 

3)  I will get dressed before noon. 

 

4)  I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web. 

 

5)  I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived. 

 

6)  I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web. 

 

7)  I will read a book...if I still remember how. 

 

8)  I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web. 

 

9)  I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email. 

 

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not. 

 

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web. 

 

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ...  and the Web will always be there tomorrow! 

 

 

*Vacation Term Translation*

 

 

In case any of you are still thinking about picking a vacation spot, be aware of the following advertising lingo...

 

Old world charm =
No bath

 

Tropical =
Rainy

 

Majestic setting =
A long way from town

 

Options galore =
Nothing is included in the itinerary

 

Secluded hideaway =
Impossible to find or get to

 

Pre-registered rooms =
Already occupied

 

Explore on your own =
Pay for it yourself

 

Knowledgeable trip hosts =
They've flown in an airplane before

 

No extra fees =
No extras

 

 

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara

 

 

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