Mother Says...
Posted by: clean-hewmor <clean-hewmor@...>
Throughout the centuries, mothers have been given their children plenty of good
advice and notable quotes. Here's just a small sampling:
PAUL REVERE'S MOTHER: "I don't care where you think you have to go, young
man. Midnight is past your curfew!"
MARY,MARY, QUITE CONTRARY'S MOTHER: "I don't minnd you having a garden,
Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?"
MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on
braces, Mona, that's the biggest smile you can give us?"
HUMPTY DUMPTY'S MOTHER: "Humpty, If I've told you once, I've told you a
hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!"
COLUMBUS'S MOTHER: "I don't care what you've descovered, Christopher. You
still could have written!"
BABE RUTH'S MOTHER: "Babe, how many times have I told you--quit playing
ball in the house! That's the third broken window this week!"
MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER: "Mike, can't you paint on walls like other children?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: " All right, Napoleon. If you aren't hiding your report
card inside your jacket,then take your hand out of there and prove it!"
CUSTER'S MOTHER: "Now, George, remember what I told you-- don't go biting
off more than you can chew!"
ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: " Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can't you
just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
BARNEY'S MOTHER: "I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but
you're starting to look a little purple."
MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school,
Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."
BATMAN'S MOTHER: "It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the
insurance is going to be?"
GOLDILOCKS'S MOTHER: "I've got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear
family. You know anything about this, Goldie?"
LITTLE MISS MUFFET'S MOTHER: " Well, all I've got to say is if you don't
get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, There'll be a lot more spiders
around here!"
ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: " But, Albert, It's your senior picture. Can't
you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?"
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money
across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
JONAH'S MOTHER: " That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really
been for the last three days."
SUPERMAN'S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we've
decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much
time in all those phone booths?"
And finally....THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you
invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to
bed!"