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Music Lesson Tuesday
#1 · September 27, 2004, 5:32 pm
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
Music Lesson
The first graders were attending their first music lesson. The teacher was trying to begin at the beginning. She drew a musical staff on the blackboard and asked a little girl to come up and write a note on it.
The little girl went to the blackboard, looked thoughtful for a minute and wrote, "Dear Aunt Emma, just a short note to tell you I'm fine."
Two Bees
Two bees met in a field. One said to the other, "How are things going?" "Really bad," said the second bee. "The weather has been cold, wet, and damp, and there aren't any flowers, so I can't make honey." "No problem," said the first bee. "Just fly down five blocks and turn left. Keep going until you see all the cars. There's a Bar Mitzvah going on and there are all kinds of fresh flowers and fresh fruit." "Thanks for the tip," said the second bee, and flew away. A few hours later the two bees ran into each other again. The first bee asked, "How'd it go?" "Great!" said the second bee. "It was everything you said it would be. There was plenty of fruit and, oh, such huge floral arrangements on every table." "Uh, what's that thing on your head?" asked the first bee. "That's my yarmulke," said the second bee. "I didn't want them to think
I was a wasp."
I was a wasp."
Threesome
Moses and Jesus are part
of a Threesome
playing golf one day.
Moses pulls up to the tee
and drives a long one.
The ball lands on the fairway,
but rolls directly toward a water trap.
Quickly, Moses raises his club,
the water parts,
and the ball rolls to the other side,
safe and sound.
Next, Jesus strolls up to the tee
and hits a nice long one
directly toward the same water trap.
It lands right in the center of the pond and kind of hovers over the
water.
Jesus casually walks out on the water
and chips the ball
right up onto the green.
Then, the third guy gets up
and sort of randomly whacks the ball.
It heads out over the fence
and into oncoming traffic on a nearby street. It bounces off a truck and
hits a nearby tree. From there, it bounces onto the roof
of a shack close by
and rolls down into the gutter,
down the drain spout,
out onto the fairway and straight
toward the fore mentioned pond.
On the way to the pond,
the ball hits a little stone
and bounces out over the water
and onto a lily pad,
where it comes quietly to rest.
Suddenly, a very large bullfrog
jumps on the lily pad
and snatches the ball into his mouth.
Just then, an eagle swoops down,
grabs the frog and flies away.
As they pass over the green,
the frog squeals with fright
and drops the ball,
which bounces right into the hole
for a beautiful hole in one.
Moses leans over toward Jesus and whispers, "Do you think your Dad would
teach me that shot?"
of a Threesome
playing golf one day.
Moses pulls up to the tee
and drives a long one.
The ball lands on the fairway,
but rolls directly toward a water trap.
Quickly, Moses raises his club,
the water parts,
and the ball rolls to the other side,
safe and sound.
Next, Jesus strolls up to the tee
and hits a nice long one
directly toward the same water trap.
It lands right in the center of the pond and kind of hovers over the
water.
Jesus casually walks out on the water
and chips the ball
right up onto the green.
Then, the third guy gets up
and sort of randomly whacks the ball.
It heads out over the fence
and into oncoming traffic on a nearby street. It bounces off a truck and
hits a nearby tree. From there, it bounces onto the roof
of a shack close by
and rolls down into the gutter,
down the drain spout,
out onto the fairway and straight
toward the fore mentioned pond.
On the way to the pond,
the ball hits a little stone
and bounces out over the water
and onto a lily pad,
where it comes quietly to rest.
Suddenly, a very large bullfrog
jumps on the lily pad
and snatches the ball into his mouth.
Just then, an eagle swoops down,
grabs the frog and flies away.
As they pass over the green,
the frog squeals with fright
and drops the ball,
which bounces right into the hole
for a beautiful hole in one.
Moses leans over toward Jesus and whispers, "Do you think your Dad would
teach me that shot?"
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
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