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New Age Grandma Monday

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

Once again we are asking for Prayers for Niki and her family. Niki is not doing well and needs our prayers now more than ever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
New Age Grandma  
 
                            
Grandma's on the net again, the kitchen's not 
her home.
 
She used to make us cherry pies, and call us on 
the phone
 
She would talk to us for hours; now she leaves 
us all alone.
 
We miss her homemade biscuits, and I'll make 
this little bet,
 
If you want to contact Grandma, you'll have to 
surf the net.
 

Grandma's surfing on the net, you bet,
 
She is surfing on the net.
 
We've been calling her all morning, and we 
haven't got her yet.
 
She's on the E-mail network, with her electronic 
friends...
 
If you want to talk to Grandma, you'll have to 
surf the net.
 
She's never surfed at Malibu, or caught a wave 
at Waikiki,
 
She's never seen a surfboard: hang ten doesn't 
mean a thing.
 
She's never met a beach-bum--Moon Doggie is just 
a pup.
 
But when she heads for her computer, you know 
the surf is up.
 
Grandma's getting older and her eyes are getting 
dim
 
Her random access memory, is half of what its 
been.
 
When Grandpa comes to call on her, She'll say I 
cant go yet.
 
He'll have to wait for Grandma, cause she's 
surfing on the net.
 
 
Smoke Signal
 

At her father's wake, a woman told her priest that ever since she was a child she and her father had discussed life after death. They had agreed that whomever went first would contact the other. They had discussed this again just two weeks before his death.
 
He died in her home and a few days after his death the smoke alarm in her garage went off. She had lived there 28 years and it had never gone off before. She couldn't turn it off so she called the security company that installed it.
 
The next morning the smoke alarm sounded again...and the reason finally dawned on her...she said aloud "Ok dad, I missed the signal yesterday, but I get it now! Thanks for letting me know that you are safe on the other side. Now turn the thing off so I don't have to call the security company again. ".   And it went off.
 
She immediately called her priest to tell him the good news. His response: "Dear lady, if every time your father sends you a message, he sets off the smoke alarm, just where do you think he's calling from?"
 
 
Grandfathers   
 
 
A small boy approached a white-haired gentleman in a store  
and asked, "Are you a grandfather?" "Yes," replied the man  
with a smile.  

"Oh, I'm glad," said the boy, "because my grandfather isn't  
here and I need a dime."  

Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
 

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