Sheep are defenseless, liable to stray, pitiful when lost, scattered, stubborn and unintelligent. Clearly, they are desperate for a shepherd. They are dependent on someone to feed protect and lead them to safe green pastures. In the Bible the church leader is called a pastor, a shepherd. The transfer is applicable. It is His charge to “shepherd the flock of God among you (1 Peter 5:2). That means he must feed them on the nutrients of God’s Word, protect them from false teachers (spiritual wolves), warn them about potential dangers, lead them to the fields of holiness and grace and correct them when they stray. Ultimately, Jesus Christ does this through them.
Randy Smith

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Not Very P-r-e-t-t-y Tuesday

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#1 · April 4, 2005, 12:09 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"Not Very P-r-e-t-t-y"
 
The two ladies were sitting in the living room, waiting for their hostess, who was slightly delayed.  The daughter of the family was with them, on the theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the wait.
 
The child was about six years old, snub nosed, freckled, buck toothed and bespectacled.  She maintained a deep silence and the two ladies peered doubtfully at her.  Finally, one of them muttered to the other, "Not very p-r-e-t-t-y, I fear," carefully spelling the key word.
 
Whereupon the child piped up, "But awful s-m-a-r-t." 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
"Holy Humor"
 
 
CHURCH CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY Trespassers will be baptized!
 
No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace.
 
Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!
 
Try our Sundays; they're better than Dairy Queen's.
 
Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!
 
People are like tea bags -- you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
 
Fight truth decay study the Bible daily.
 
How will you spend eternity "Smoking or Nonsmoking?"
 
Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives
 
It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin.
 
Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.
 
If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
 
If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
 
Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
 
This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing? - (U R)
 
In the dark? Follow the Son.
 
Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.
 
If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.
 
Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world!
 
An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone  tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that  reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets."
 
When the restaurant next to another Church put out a big sign with red letters that said,"Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
 
AND THE WINNER !
 
ON THE PASTOR'S PARKING SPOT - PASTOR'S SPOT  ---  YOU PARK,  YOU PREACH
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"Baptism"
 
 
A father is in church with three of his young
children, including his five year old daughter.
 
As was customary, he sat in the very front row
so that the children could properly witness the
service.
 
During this particular service, the minister was
performing the baptism of a tiny infant. The little
five year old girl was taken by this, observing that
he was saying something and pouring water over
the infant's head.
 
With a quizzical look on her face, the little girl turned
to her father and asked, "Daddy, why is he
brainwashing that baby?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 
"A happy heart is like good medicine" (Proverbs 17:22)
 
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
 
 
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