Sports Illustrated Friday
Quote from Forum Archives on October 15, 2004, 4:43 pmPosted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
"SPORTS ILLUSTRATED"The coach's wife yells to her husband, "It's Sports
Illustrated on the phone!"The coach falls all over himself racing to the phone
and says, "Hello?"Then he hears, "For just 75 cents an issue...."
"STOLEN WIG"
While my friend was working as a receptionist for an eye surgeon, a very angry woman stormed up to her desk..
"Someone stole my wig while I was having surgery yesterday," she complained.The doctor came out and tried to calm her down. "I assure you that no one on my staff would have done such a thing," he said. "Why do you think it was taken here?"
"After the operation, I noticed the wig I was wearing was cheap-looking and ugly."
"I think" explained the surgeon gently, "that means your cataract operation was a success."
"COW HORNS"
Mister, why doesn't this cow have any horns?" asked the young lady from a nearby city.
The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, "Well, ma'am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep'em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young 'uns by puttin' a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops 'em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow don't have no horns, ma'am, is 'cause it's a horse."
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
Necessary Legal InformationI do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from me it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than me, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
Illustrated on the phone!"
The coach falls all over himself racing to the phone
and says, "Hello?"
Then he hears, "For just 75 cents an issue...."
"STOLEN WIG"
While my friend was working as a receptionist for an eye surgeon, a very angry woman stormed up to her desk..
"Someone stole my wig while I was having surgery yesterday," she complained.
The doctor came out and tried to calm her down. "I assure you that no one on my staff would have done such a thing," he said. "Why do you think it was taken here?"
"After the operation, I noticed the wig I was wearing was cheap-looking and ugly."
"I think" explained the surgeon gently, "that means your cataract operation was a success."
"COW HORNS"
Mister, why doesn't this cow have any horns?" asked the young lady from a nearby city.
The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, "Well, ma'am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep'em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young 'uns by puttin' a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops 'em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow don't have no horns, ma'am, is 'cause it's a horse."
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
I do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from me it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than me, has forwarded it to you.
Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute. Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>