Ten Commandments For Stress Reduction
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
I. Thou shalt not be perfect, or even try to be.
II. Thou shalt not try to be all things to all people.
III. Thou shalt sometimes leave things undone.
IV. Thou shalt not spread thyself too thin.
V. Thou shalt learn to say "no".
VI. Thou shalt schedule time for thyself and for thy support network.
VII. Thou shalt switch thyself off, and do nothing regularly.
VIII. Thou shalt not even feel guilty for doing nothing, or saying no.
IX. Thou shalt be boring, untidy, inelegant, and unattractive at
times.
X. Especially, thou shalt not be thine own worst enemy. But, be thine
own best friend.
The Gift
A woman's husband asked her what she wanted for
Mother's Day. She thought for a moment and said, "This
year I just want cold, hard cash for a change."
The following day her husband filled her request. He
put $20 in nickels, dimes and quarters into a quart
jar, then filled it with water and placed it in the
freezer. On Mother's Day, he handed his wife a solidly
frozen bottle of change.
The Consultant
A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote
pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW
advanced out of the dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie,
leaned out the window and asked the shepherd...
"If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have
in your flock, will you give me one?"
The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a
yuppie, then looked at his peacefully-grazing
flock and calmly answered, "Sure."
The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his IBM
Thinkpad and connected it to a cell phone, then
he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where
he called up a GPS satellite navigation system,
scanned the area, and then opened up a database
and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas.
He sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a
few minutes, received a response. Finally, he
prints out a 130 page report on his miniaturized
printer then turns to the shepherd and says.......
"You have exactly 1586 sheep."
"That is correct; take one of the sheep." said the
shepherd.
He watches the young man select one of the
animals and bundle it into his car.
Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly
what your business is, will you give me back my
animal?"
"OK, why not." answered the young man.
"Clearly, you are a consultant." said the shepherd.
"That's correct." says the yuppie, "but how did
you guess that?"
"No guessing required." answers the shepherd.
"You turned up here although nobody called you.
You want to get paid for an answer I already knew,
to a question I never asked, and you don't know
a thing about my business.... Now give me back
my dog."
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
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