Forum Navigation
You need to log in to create posts and topics.

The ABC'S Of Christmas Friday

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"The ABC'S Of Christmas"
     
         
 
A - Almost done Christmas shopping.

B - Bulb, the one that burnt out and can't find.
 
C - Can't find the perfect gift for mom.
 
D - Dang cat keeps knockin Christmas
..........ornaments off the tree.
 
E - Everyone is coming over.
 
F - Found the perfect tree.
 
G - God Help Me!!!!!!!!!
 
H - Here comes Santa Clause.
 
I - Is Christmas almost over?
 
J - Just burnt the ham.
 
K - Keep your hands off that present.
 
L - Lights won't work (see B)
 
M - Must start earlier next year.
 
N - Need more socks for Christmas. (lol)
 
O - Ohhh Nooo The tree fell &
...........can't get back up.
 
P - Please pass the tylenol.
 
Q - Quiet as a mouse - not this house.
 
R - Really need a nap.
 
S - Santa's gonna skip this house.
 
T - To Foxee from Santa
 
U - Ugliest tree I've ever seen.
 
V - Virtual Cards are all sent.
 
W - Whats's a White Christmas?
 
X - Xmas on the Net.
 
Y - You still reading this?
 
Z - Zero hours - Christmas is here!!!!
"Santas Naughty List"
 
 
Not scrubbing behind your ears.
 
Trying to find hidden Christmas Presents.
 
Pulling off tags that say "Do not Remove"
 
Not rewinding videos before returning them.
 
Getting into the express lane with
more then 10 items.
 
Pushing toys under the bed instead of putting
them away.
 
Putting out milk thats expired for Santa.
 
Rewrapping a gift from someone else that you
didn't like.
 
Stretching your Christmas stocking so it holds more.
 
Acting like a BRAT towards friends and family.
"Psychotic Christmas Carols"
 
 
A Christmas Carol for Any Psychosis!
 
Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear?
 
Multiple Personality - We Three Queens Disoriented Are.
 
Dementia - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas.
 
Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing (About Me)
 
Mania - Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and
             Stores and Office and Town ...
 
Paranoia - Santa Claus is Coming To Town (To Get Me).
 
Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm
                                      Gonna Pout, then MAYBE I'll tell you why.
 
Depression - Silent anhedonia, Holy anhedonia. All is calm,
                       All is pretty lonely.
 
Obsessive Compulsive - Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
                                     Jingle Bell...
 
Borderline Personality - Thoughts of Roasting in an Open Fire.
 
Passive Aggressive - On the First Day of Christmas My True Love
                                Gave to Me (and then took it all away).
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
 
 
Necessary Legal Information
 
We do not mail clean-hewmor unsolicited. If you are receiving this newsletter from us it's because you have subscribed to this mailing list. If you receive this newsletter and are not a subscriber then someone, other than us, has forwarded it to you.
 
 
 

Clean-Hewmor is only as good as the humor YOU contribute.  Please take a few moments to send something funny so we can all get a good laugh! -- To unsubscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-unsubscribe@welovegod.org To subscribe, send ANY message to: clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org>