Quote from Forum Archives on April 6, 2005, 12:15 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

 

                   

+++++++++++++++++++++++

 

"The Dead Husband"

 

 

Two elderly ladies meet at the launderette after not seeing one another
for some time. After inquiring about each other's health, one asked how
the other's husband was doing.

 

"Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for
dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle
of the vegetable patch!"

 

"Oh dear! I'm so very sorry," replied her friend, "What did you do?"

 

"Opened a can of peas instead."

+++++++++++++++++++++++

 

"Holding"

 

 

My youngest son asked me how old I was.

 

I answered, "39 and holding."

 

He thought for a moment and then asked,

 

"And how old would you be if you let go?"

+++++++++++++++++++++++

 

"Cowboy Boots"

 

 

Did you hear about the Texas teacher who was helping one of her
kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots?

 

He asked for help and she could see why.
Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn't
want to go on.  Finally, when the 2nd boot was on, she had worked up a
sweat.
She almost cried when the little boy said, "Teacher, they're on the
wrong feet."
She looked and sure enough, they were. It wasn't any easier pulling
the boots off than it was putting them on.

 

She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to
get the boots back on, this time on the right feet.

 

He then announced, "These aren't my boots." She bit her tongue
rather than get right in his face and scream, "Why didn't you say so
?" like she wanted to.

 

And, once again she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots
off his little feet.

 

No sooner they got the boots off and he said, "They're my brother's
boots.  My Mom made me wear'em."

 

Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry. But, she mustered up
the grace and courage she had left to wrestle the boots on his feet
again.

 

Helping him into his coat, she asked, "Now, where are your mittens?"

 

He said, "I stuffed 'em in the toes of my boots."

 

Her trial starts next month.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

 

"A happy heart is like good medicine" (Proverbs 17:22)

 

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

 

 

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