Tips for Moms
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MOM'S HINT #001: Cut off the crusts.
MOM'S HINT #002: Make real cocoa.
MOM'S HINT #003: Hang their drawings on the fridge.
MOM'S HINT #004: Say the clay ashtray is what you always wanted.
MOM'S HINT #005: Sing silly songs.
MOM'S HINT #006: Make goofy faces.
MOM'S HINT #007: Let them take off the training wheels.
MOM'S HINT #008: Remind the Tooth Fairy about inflation.
MOM'S HINT #009: Buy a good stain remover.
MOM'S HINT #010: Let them keep the kitten.
MOM'S HINT #011: Remember when YOU misbehaved.
MOM'S HINT #012: If you don't know, say so.
MOM'S HINT #013: Let grandma spoil them.
MOM'S HINT #014: Let them stay up just a little bit longer.
MOM'S HINT #015: Lock up the good china.
MOM'S HINT #016: Tickle.
MOM'S HINT #017: Be a good sport.
MOM'S HINT #018: Be a good friend.
MOM'S HINT #019: Smile when your mother-in-law gives you advice.
MOM'S HINT #020: ALL mothers are working mothers.
MOM'S HINT #021: Ultimatums don't work.
MOM'S HINT #022: Bribes work.
MOM'S HINT #023: Hysteria will get you nowhere.
MOM'S HINT #024: Their first summer at camp is murder.
MOM'S HINT #025: Let them lick the spoon.
MOM'S HINT #026: Learn lots of lullabies.
MOM'S HINT #027: Breastfeeding in public goes over better in Europe.
MOM'S HINT #028: Learn to handle sleep deprivation.
MOM'S HINT #029: Have an answer ready for "Where do babies come from?"
MOM'S HINT #030: Don't flinch when they grow taller than you.
MOM'S HINT #031: Going to college don't mean they won't come back.
MOM'S HINT #032: Don't teach them to parallel park.
MOM'S HINT #033: Be consistent.
MOM'S HINT #034: Think quick.
MOM'S HINT #035: Improvise.
MOM'S HINT #036: Sympathize.
MOM'S HINT #037: Remember: It's just a phase.
MOM'S HINT #038: "Wait till your father gets home" is a cop-out.
MOM'S HINT #039: "Because I said so" is a good reason.
MOM'S HINT #040: Never tell them how much they'll inherit.
MOM'S HINT #041: Teach them four precious words: "We can't afford it.".
MOM'S HINT #042: Carry Wash'n Dri.
MOM'S HINT #043: Smile when you change that diaper.
MOM'S HINT #044: It's absolutely okay to say "No".
MOM'S HINT #045: Buy chunky peanut butter in jumbo jars.
MOM'S HINT #046: Run a credit line at the toy store.
MOM'S HINT #047: Forget suede.
MOM'S HINT #048: Teachers ARE underpaid.
MOM'S HINT #049: Learn the rules of football.
MOM'S HINT #050: Teach them to write thank you notes.
MOM'S HINT #051: Your teenage daughter WILL find you embarrassing.
MOM'S HINT #052: Cheese food is not cheese.
MOM'S HINT #053: Thirteen is too late to put them up for adoption.
MOM'S HINT #054: Potty training builds character (yours).
MOM'S HINT #055: Sibling rivalry builds character (theirs).
MOM'S HINT #056: Worry, worry, worry.
MOM'S HINT #057: Childbirth is not for wimps.
MOM'S HINT #058: Stretch marks are a badge of honor.
MOM'S HINT #059: Half your brain leaves with the placenta.
MOM'S HINT #060: Donate pre-pregnancy jeans to charity.
MOM'S HINT #061: Don't read the label on baby formula.
MOM'S HINT #062: With luck, they'll call you once a week when they leave
MOM'S HINT #063: With luck, they won't call collect.
MOM'S HINT #064: With luck, they'll pay for their own therapy when grown
MOM'S HINT #065: No matter what, they'll always be your babies.
MOM'S HINT #066: The older they get, the wiser you'll seem.
MOM'S HINT #067: Just when you've got them figured out, they change.
MOM'S HINT #068: Kiss it an make it better.
MOM'S HINT #069: Make ice cube popsicles.
MOM'S HINT #070: If you promised, do it.
MOM'S HINT #071: Watch what you promise.
MOM'S HINT #072: When in doubt, say "We'll see."
MOM'S HINT #073: Bunk beds are cool.
MOM'S HINT #074: You'll sometimes act just like YOUR mother.
MOM'S HINT #075: Buy Permapress.
MOM'S HINT #076: Use the honor system.
MOM'S HINT #077: You can only shoot so much videotape.
MOM'S HINT #078: Pose good questions.
MOM'S HINT #079: Colic happens.
MOM'S HINT #080: Cowlicks happen.
MOM'S HINT #081: Look what being a martyr got Joan of Arc.
MOM'S HINT #082: A dishwasher is not a luxury.
MOM'S HINT #083: The new math is harder than the old math.
MOM'S HINT #084: Let's hear it for leftovers.
MOM'S HINT #085: Don't leave their teddy bear behind.
MOM'S HINT #086: Learn to make daisy chains.
MOM'S HINT #087: Not everyone can be a valedictorian.
MOM'S HINT #088: They're never too old to scold.
MOM'S HINT #089: They're never too big to hug.
MOM'S HINT #090: They're never too smart to receive some good advice.
MOM'S HINT #091: They're never too rich to take home your leftovers.
MOM'S HINT #092: Don't remind your grown son you changed his diapers.
MOM'S HINT #093: If they grow up to be doctors, take the credit.
MOM'S HINT #094: If they grow up to be lawyers, don't take the blame.
MOM'S HINT #095: If they become pro-athletes, take the house & car.
MOM'S HINT #096: If they become politicians they were switched at birth.
MOM'S HINT #097: Don't teach the kids your fear of bugs.
MOM'S HINT #098: Take them to a petting zoo.
MOM'S HINT #099: Don't use a pediatrician who isn't a parent.
MOM'S HINT #100: You can never have too many Kleenex.
MOM'S HINT #101: Reserve the New Year's Eve babysitter on January 2.
MOM'S HINT #102: You can blame just about anything on teething.
MOM'S HINT #103: Some of the great minds of our time were bed wetters.
MOM'S HINT #104: Let someone else break the news about Santa Claus.
MOM'S HINT #105: Not everyone can win the Pillsbury Bake-Off.
MOM'S HINT #106: Iodine really DOES sting.
MOM'S HINT #107: Mother's Day comes but once a year--milk it.
MOM'S HINT #108: Adjust allowances for cost of living.
MOM'S HINT #109: Cookie dough is better than cookies.
MOM'S HINT #110: Don't let the kids forget Father's Day.
MOM'S HINT #111: Tie their mittens together.
MOM'S HINT #112: When they say they've got to go, stop!
MOM'S HINT #113: An unmade bed is easier to get into.
MOM'S HINT #114: Prove there's no monster under the bed.
MOM'S HINT #115: Hugs are the antidotes to nightmares.
MOM'S HINT #116: Don't put their favorite blankie in the wash.
MOM'S HINT #117: Disney World is not optional.
MOM'S HINT #118: A little fast food never killed anyone.
MOM'S HINT #119: They already know more about computers than you do.
MOM'S HINT #120: Even George Bush didn't eat his broccoli.
MOM'S HINT #121: Teach the kids to recycle.
MOM'S HINT #122: Someday your son will love another woman.
MOM'S HINT #123: When they leave home, you'll actually miss them.
MOM'S HINT #124: Whatever your age, you're too young to be a grandma.
MOM'S HINT #125: The more they tease you, the more you're loved.
MOM'S HINT #126: Always make their favorite dish when they visit.
MOM'S HINT #127: Believe it or not, SATs aren't everything.
MOM'S HINT #128: Yes, it's important they wear what their friends wear.
MOM'S HINT #129: Teenagers are SUPPOSED to dress goofy.
MOM'S HINT #130: Yes, we're all tired of dinosaurs.
MOM'S HINT #131: Anyone can make a secret special sauce.
MOM'S HINT #132: Buy them a globe.
MOM'S HINT #133: Socks and underwear are not gifts.
MOM'S HINT #134: Ear thermometers beat rectal any day.
MOM'S HINT #135: Hide old toys and reintroduce them next week.
MOM'S HINT #136: Bribe the babysitter with Hagen-Dazs.
MOM'S HINT #137: No matter what, your son will wind up with a toy gun.
MOM'S HINT #138: No matter what, your daughter will want Barbie.
MOM'S HINT #139: No matter what, you will memorize GOOD NIGHT MOON.
MOM'S HINT #140: Puberty was tough for you too.
MOM'S HINT #141: They'll always bring home their laundry.
MOM'S HINT #142: Courage.
MOM'S HINT #143: Grace doesn't count unless it's under pressure.
MOM'S HINT #144: Many geniuses were late bloomers.
MOM'S HINT #145: When you retire, feel free to spend their inheritance.
MOM'S HINT #146: Hold their hands during vaccinations.
MOM'S HINT #147: Look encouraging at the dentist.
MOM'S HINT #148: Don't give your son a crew cut.
MOM'S HINT #149: "Bambi" is too scary for five-year olds.
MOM'S HINT #150: Froot Loops are NOT a balanced meal.
MOM'S HINT #151: Yes, they need all sixty-four Crayolas.
MOM'S HINT #152: No, they can't have a pony.
MOM'S HINT #153: Chicken soup couldn't hurt.
MOM'S HINT #154: Keep the cookie jar full.
MOM'S HINT #155: Tuck them in.
MOM'S HINT #156: Add sound effects to the bedtime story.
MOM'S HINT #157: No, they REALLY can't have a pony.
MOM'S HINT #158: Gingerbread houses aren't worth the work.
MOM'S HINT #159: Tollhouse cookies ARE worth the work.
MOM'S HINT #160: Put plenty of icing on birthday cakes.
MOM'S HINT #161: Don't tell you helped blow out the candles.
MOM'S HINT #162: Kids give more gifts than they'll receive.
MOM'S HINT #163: Kids WILL drink straight from the carton.
MOM'S HINT #164: Look sad when the snowman melts.
MOM'S HINT #165: Kids prefer hot dogs to duck a l'orange.
MOM'S HINT #166: A sense of humor is a necessity.
MOM'S HINT #167: They don't call it women's intuition for nothing.
MOM'S HINT #168: Insist on short-haired dogs.
MOM'S HINT #169: Coax the cat out of the tree.
MOM'S HINT #170: For the last time, a pony is out!
MOM'S HINT #171: Sew name tags in their underwear.
MOM'S HINT #172: Be a den mother.
MOM'S HINT #173: Let your daughter have a training bra.
MOM'S HINT #174: Buy your share of EXPENSIVE Girl Scout cookies
MOM'S HINT #175: Cultivate the art of napping.
MOM'S HINT #176: Washable markers aren't.
MOM'S HINT #177: Help build a sandcastle.
MOM'S HINT #178: Let them make a fort out of boxes.
MOM'S HINT #179: Piano lessons aren't for everyone.
MOM'S HINT #180: Tell Dad to share the toy trains.
MOM'S HINT #181: Tell your daughter she CAN be a fire fighter.
MOM'S HINT #182: Host a slumber party.
MOM'S HINT #183: Don't hover.
MOM'S HINT #184: Childhood doesn't go as fast as they say.
MOM'S HINT #185: Don't make your twelve-year-old shop for underwear.
MOM'S HINT #186: Take snapshots on the first day of school.
MOM'S HINT #187: Help carve a pumpkin.
MOM'S HINT #188: Sail paper airplanes.
MOM'S HINT #189: Teach them to whistle.
MOM'S HINT #190: Volunteer for class trips.
MOM'S HINT #191: Join the PTA.
MOM'S HINT #192: Don't panic.
MOM'S HINT #193: Hunt for four-leaf clovers.
MOM'S HINT #194: Befriend other mothers.
MOM'S HINT #195: Don't let kids record answering machine messages.
MOM'S HINT #196: Scotchguard everything.
MOM'S HINT #197: There's a little Martha Stewart in all of us.
MOM'S HINT #198: Never use the check-out with the candy display.
MOM'S HINT #199: All car trip diversions last three minutes.
MOM'S HINT #200: Snowsuits induce the desire to go to the bathroom.
MOM'S HINT #201: Let them eat Oreos inside-out.
MOM'S HINT #202: Be ready when kids ask "What were the Beatles?".
MOM'S HINT #203: You did SO do that at their ages.
MOM'S HINT #204: The more solemn the moment, the louder they cry.
MOM'S HINT #205: Kids get dirty quicker on more important occasions.
MOM'S HINT #206: Don't take kids grocery shopping on empty stomachs.
MOM'S HINT #207: Forget your moral objections to pacifiers.
MOM'S HINT #208: Forbidden junk food will be eaten at neighbor's house.
MOM'S HINT #209: Prohibited TV shows will be watched at neighbor's home.
MOM'S HINT #210: Tell know-it-alls: Mind your own business.
MOM'S HINT #211: Put a lock on your bedroom door.
MOM'S HINT #212: Trust your instincts.
MOM'S HINT #213: Occasionally you WILL use the TV as a babysitter.
MOM'S HINT #214: If they won't clean their plates, use smaller plates.
MOM'S HINT #215: Pack school lunches with good trading items.
MOM'S HINT #216: There's a lot of wisdom in MAD magazine.
MOM'S HINT #217: Don't flush the fish.
MOM'S HINT #218: Let them eat cake.
MOM'S HINT #219: Let them eat animal crackers.
MOM'S HINT #220: Keep smiling.
MOM'S HINT #221: There's no escaping car pools.
MOM'S HINT #222: Yes, they'll need braces.
MOM'S HINT #223: Yes, they'll need stitches.
MOM'S HINT #224: Guilt is an art form.
MOM'S HINT #225: Curfews are made to be broken.
MOM'S HINT #226: Dry their tears.
MOM'S HINT #227: Play Name the State Capitals.
MOM'S HINT #228: Teach them to read maps.
MOM'S HINT #229: Do a jigsaw puzzle together.
MOM'S HINT #230: Ask only that they try their best.
MOM'S HINT #231: Your son's wife will not be pretty enough.
MOM'S HINT #232: Your daughter's husband will not earn enough.
MOM'S HINT #233: When they have kids, they'll REALLY appreciate you.
MOM'S HINT #234: Grandchildren are for spoiling.
MOM'S HINT #235: Transfer old home movies to video.
MOM'S HINT #236: Make lemonade from real lemons.
MOM'S HINT #237: It's your duty to brag.
MOM'S HINT #238: Point out that your granddaughter has your eyes.
MOM'S HINT #239: Be sure to mention that your grandson has your smile.
MOM'S HINT #240: Let your daughter think she's a better mother than you.
MOM'S HINT #241: When daughter's in labor don't say "Now you know.".
MOM'S HINT #242: Teenage daughters are hazardous to your health.
MOM'S HINT #243: Teenage sons are hazardous to their own health.
MOM'S HINT #244: How long CAN you put off the birds & bees lecture?
MOM'S HINT #245: How many times can you rewrite your will?
MOM'S HINT #246: Never buy retail.
MOM'S HINT #247: Cheer when they get their driver's licenses.
MOM'S HINT #248: Smile when they squash your Chevy.
MOM'S HINT #249: Send a care package to college.
MOM'S HINT #250: Resist the impulse to clean their dorm rooms.
MOM'S HINT #251: If they become Ivy Leaguers it's because of YOUR genes.
MOM'S HINT #252: If they're going to State, it's because of Dad's genes.
MOM'S HINT #253: Teach them to swim early.
MOM'S HINT #254: Insist on bike helmets.
MOM'S HINT #255: Learn CPR.
MOM'S HINT #256: Take them to the circus.
MOM'S HINT #257: Send an apple for the teacher.
MOM'S HINT #258: No blue hair.
MOM'S HINT #259: Remind them when it's your silver anniversary.
MOM'S HINT #260: Forbid them to put you in a nursing home.
MOM'S HINT #261: Threaten to haunt them from beyond the grave.
MOM'S HINT #262: Ask them for advice once in a while.
MOM'S HINT #263: Look humble when they say "How'd you do it, Mom?"
MOM'S HINT #264: Pass along your wedding dress to your daughter.
MOM'S HINT #265: Give Snickers at Halloween.
MOM'S HINT #266: Remember the names of their stuffed animals.
MOM'S HINT #267: Watch all the Peanuts TV specials.
MOM'S HINT #268: Buy industrial-size detergent boxes.
MOM'S HINT #269: Learn to say "Watch out!" with feeling.
MOM'S HINT #270: Buy them cool lunch boxes.
MOM'S HINT #271: Teach them how much God loves them!
MOM'S HINT #272: Teach them to love others.
MOM'S HINT #273: Your daughter's house will never be as clean as yours.
MOM'S HINT #274: Dance a tango at your child's wedding.
MOM'S HINT #275: Reminisce.
MOM'S HINT #276: Make their Halloween costumes.
MOM'S HINT #277: Play Scrabble with them.
MOM'S HINT #278: Play cards with them.
MOM'S HINT #279: Good news and bad: Anything can be a toy.
MOM'S HINT #280: Good news and bad: Before you know it, they're walking.
MOM'S HINT #281: Good news and bad: Before you know it, they're talking.
MOM'S HINT #282: Good news & bad: Before you know it they're in college.
MOM'S HINT #283: Keep a first-aid kit handy.
MOM'S HINT #284: You and Dad need a "Date Night".
MOM'S HINT #285: Let them make their own sundaes.
MOM'S HINT #286: Don't show their dates naked baby pictures.
MOM'S HINT #287: Traditions are important.
MOM'S HINT #288: Don't forget, each new kid is a tax deduction.
MOM'S HINT #289: Teach them to love libraries.
MOM'S HINT #290: Help start a stamp collection.
MOM'S HINT #291: Give pennies for piggy banks.
MOM'S HINT #292: Learn to love Trolls.
MOM'S HINT #293: Pray for a chicken pox vaccine.
MOM'S HINT #294: Don't insist on combing your daughter's hair in public.
MOM'S HINT #295: Try to get some breakfast in them.
MOM'S HINT #296: Ice cream still solves most problems.
MOM'S HINT #297: You can't praise a kid too much.
MOM'S HINT #298: Buy them a good dictionary.
MOM'S HINT #299: Let them have an aquarium.
MOM'S HINT #300: Shiny thing in driveway is your kid's new retainer.
MOM'S HINT #301: Always look before sitting.
MOM'S HINT #302: Have a snowball fight.
MOM'S HINT #303: Hold hands while crossing.
MOM'S HINT #304: Let them visit where you work.
MOM'S HINT #305: No matter what, they'll bring home colds from school.
MOM'S HINT #306: Take them camping!
MOM'S HINT #307: Don't weep when the school bus takes them away.
MOM'S HINT #308: Attend school plays.
MOM'S HINT #309: Don't yell at Little League umpires.
MOM'S HINT #310: Junior High is traumatic.
MOM'S HINT #311: Everyone tries to get out of gym class.
MOM'S HINT #312: Before disciplining -- decompress.
MOM'S HINT #313: They'll outgrow their shoes before the laces get dirty.
MOM'S HINT #314: Let them play dress up.
MOM'S HINT #315: Learn to throw a baseball.
MOM'S HINT #316: Learn to catch a boomerang.
MOM'S HINT #317: If they created it at camp, put it on display.
MOM'S HINT #318: Food fights happen.
MOM'S HINT #319: Get washable wallpaper.
MOM'S HINT #320: Don't let them call you by your first name.
MOM'S HINT #321: They DO look cutest when they're sleeping.
MOM'S HINT #322: Tell stories about the good things people have done.
MOM'S HINT #323: Point out good behaviour first.
MOM'S HINT #324: Remember how your mother felt about the Carpenters.
MOM'S HINT #325: Celebrate Velcro!
MOM'S HINT #326: Record their singing.
MOM'S HINT #327: She's all grown up when she stretches your sweater.
MOM'S HINT #328: You know your son's grown up when he blushes.
MOM'S HINT #329: Hang a tire swing.
MOM'S HINT #330: They'll eat paper and dirt and survive.
MOM'S HINT #331: If all else fails, take them to the video arcade.
MOM'S HINT #332: Let her get her ears pierced.
MOM'S HINT #333: Monster truck rallies can be educational.
MOM'S HINT #334: Let them play cowboy.
MOM'S HINT #335: Discourage them from tying up the babysitter.
MOM'S HINT #336: Don't hold up other people's children as role models.
MOM'S HINT #337: When they fall asleep in the stroller, don't move them.
MOM'S HINT #338: Show them photos of yourself as a child.
MOM'S HINT #339: Let's hear it for stereo headphones.
MOM'S HINT #340: Cartoons are a good way to learn classical music.
MOM'S HINT #341: Don't kiss teens in front of their friends.
MOM'S HINT #342: No credit cards until they graduate.
MOM'S HINT #343: Check before believing Dad said it was okay.
MOM'S HINT #344: Murphy's Law is true.
MOM'S HINT #345: Feel free to remind them of your labor pains.
MOM'S HINT #346: Sometimes you'll have to tell little white lies.
MOM'S HINT #347: Remember that you used Cliff Notes too.
MOM'S HINT #348: At least comic books mean they're reading.
MOM'S HINT #349: Disposable diapers are worth the guilt.
MOM'S HINT #350: Don't buy infant clothes without snaps.
MOM'S HINT #351: Clothes that fit just right are too small.
MOM'S HINT #352: Everybody's a critic.
MOM'S HINT #353: Get call waiting.
MOM'S HINT #354: If you have teenagers, get your own phone.
MOM'S HINT #355: You know more about chaos theory than most physicists.
MOM'S HINT #356: Grass stains are Mother Nature's way of saying "Hi".
MOM'S HINT #357: Nervous breakdowns-Nature saying "Take it easy.".
MOM'S HINT #358: Arrange to sleep in at least once a month.
MOM'S HINT #359: Know when enough is enough.
MOM'S HINT #360: Don't mention their zits.
MOM'S HINT #361: When technology is ready, clone yourself.
MOM'S HINT #362: Let your daughter wear your high heels.
MOM'S HINT #363: Admire your son's mustache even if you can't see it.
MOM'S HINT #364: Discourage grown kid's from writing a tell-all book.
MOM'S HINT #365: You'll never stop wondering if you did a good job.