Quote from Forum Archives on June 14, 2004, 5:45 pm

Posted by: Bigguyhereagain <Bigguyhereagain@...>

Tonsillectomy

 

 

We were on our way to the hospital where our 16-year-old daughter was scheduled to undergo a tonsillectomy.  During the ride we talked about how the procedure would be performed.  

"Dad," our teenager asked, "how are they going to keep my mouth open during the surgery?" 

Without hesitation he quipped, "They're going to give you a phone."

 

 

       The Dog

 

       

    

      Adam and Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the
      garden, you walked with us every day. Now we
      do not see you any more. We are lonesome here,
      and it is difficult for us to remember how much
      you love us."

      And God said, "No problem! I will create a com-
      panion for you that will be with you forever and
      who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that
      you will love me even when you cannot see me.
      Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable
      you may be, this new companion will accept you
      as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of
      yourselves." And God created a new animal to be
      a companion for Adam and Eve. And it was a
      good animal. And God was pleased. And the new
      animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and
      he wagged his tail.

      And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all
      the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of
      a name for this new animal."

      And God said, "No problem. Because I have
      created this new animal to be a reflection of my
      love for you, his name will be a reflection of my
      own name, and you will call him DOG."

      And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a
      companion to them and loved them.

      And they were comforted. And God was pleased.
      And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

      After a while, it came to pass that an angel came
      to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam and Eve have
      become filled with pride. They strut and preen
      like peacocks and they believe they are worthy
      of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that
      they are loved, but perhaps too well."

      And God said, "No problem! I will create for
      them a companion who will be with them forever
      and who will see them as they are. The companion
      will remind them of their limitations, so they will
      know that they are not always worthy of adoration."

      And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam
      and Eve.

      And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam
      and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded
      that they were not the supreme beings.

      And Adam and Eve learned humility. And they were
      greatly improved. And God was pleased. And Dog
      was happy.

      And Cat didn't give a darn one way or the other.

 

 

Teacher

 

 

Teacher: "There's an old saying that cats have nine lives.  
Does any animal have any more than that?"  

Little Johnny: "Sure, frogs. They croak every night." 

 

 

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

 

 

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