What Is Easter? Friday
Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>
Three stupid guys just died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first man, "WHAT IS EASTER?" The man replies, "Oh, that's easy, it's the holiday in November when everybody gets together, eats turkey, and is thankful..."
"WRONG," replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second man the same question, "WHAT IS EASTER?"
The second man replies, "No, Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus."
St. Peter looks at the second man, shakes his head in disgust, looks at the third man and asks, "WHAT IS EASTER?"
The third man smiles and looks St. Pete in the eye.
"I know what Easter is. Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and He was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. The Romans took Him to be crucified and was stabbed in the side, made Him wear a crown of thorns, and He was hung on a cross. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder. Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out, and if He sees his shadow there will be six more weeks of winter."
"3 Days Later"
It was following the resurrection and disciples were still somewhat scattered about Jerusalem and the surrounding villages. John finds Peter and runs up to him. Excitedly he says, "Peter, Peter! I've got some good news and some bad news."
Peter takes ahold of John and calms him down. "Take it easy, John. What is it? What's the good news?"
John says, "The good news is Christ is risen."
Peter says, "That's great! But, what's the bad news?"
John, looking around, says, "He's really steamed about last Friday."
"EASTER JOKES"
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole?
A Hot Cross bunny.
What did the bunny say when he only had thistles to eat?
Thistle have to do!
Is it true that bunnies have good eye sight?
Well you never see a bunny wearing glasses, do you?
What did the grey rabbit say to the blue rabbit?
Cheer up!
Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the world?
It has 4 rabbits' feet.
How do you post a bunny?
Hare mail.
What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote?
One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny!
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a leek?
A bunion.
What does a bunny use when it goes fishing?
A harenet.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange?
A pip squeak.
What did the bunny want to do when he grew up?
Join the Hare Force.
What goes ha-ha-clunk?
A bunny laughing its head off.
How do you make a rabbit stew?
Make it wait for 3 hours!.
What do you get when you cross an bunny with a Scottish bun?
A bonnybunnybun!
What do you get if you cross a 'Jackaroo'- Bunny with a Dr. Frankenstien?
You get a 'hare-brained' Jackyl!
Where does a bunny go when it dies?
To the hare-after.
What do you get when you cross an Easter bunny with a blue Easter bunny?
A crying bunny!
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