Quote from Forum Archives on June 3, 2005, 6:34 pm

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

"When I'm an Old Woman"

I will live with my children and bring them great joy.
To repay all I've had from each girl and boy.

I shall draw on the walls and scuff up the floor;
Run in and out without closing the door.

I'll hide frogs in the pantry, socks under my bed.
Whenever they scold me, I'll just hang my head.

I'll run and I'll romp, and always fritter away
The time to be spent doing chores every day.

I'll pester my children when they are on the phone.
As long as they're busy I won't leave them alone.

I'll hide candy in closets, rocks in a drawer,
And never pick up my clothes from the floor.

Dash off to the movies and not wash a dish.
I'll plead for allowance whenever I wish.

I'll stuff up the plumbing and deluge the floor.
As soon as they've mopped it I'll flood it some more.

And when they correct me, I'll lie down and cry,
Kicking and screaming, not a tear in my eye.

I'll take all their pencils and flashlights, and then
When they buy new ones, I'll take them again.

I'll spill glasses of milk to complete every meal,
Eat my banana and just drop the peel.

Put toys on the table, spill jam on the floor,
I'll break lots of dishes as though I were four.

What Fun I shall have, what Joy it will be
to live with my children....
the way they lived with me!
author unknown

---

"The Pastor's Mother and the Usher"

      

An elderly woman walked into the local country church. The friendly usher greeted her at the door and helped her up the flight of steps. "Where would you like to sit?" he asked politely.

"The front row please." she answered.

"You really don't want to do that", the usher said. "The pastor is really boring."

"Do you happen to know who I am?" the woman inquired."No." he said.

"I'm the pastor's mother," she replied indignantly.

"Do you know who I am?" he asked.

"No." she said.

"Good," he answered.

---

"Don't Worry"

 

A pastor and his family (two children) were invited to attend a
cousin's high school graduation. He thought he'd prepare the kids,
knowing how fidgety they can get.

 

"Graduations are sometimes long, boring events," he said.  "I want
you guys to behave and not ask constantly when it's going to be
over."

 

"Don't worry, Dad.  We'll live," the daughter replied.  "We last
through all your sermons, don't we?"

---

 

You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile.

 

Have a Blessed Day

Dave and Barbara

 

 

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