Of all people who engage in controversy, we, who are called Calvinists, are most expressly bound by our own principles to the exercise of gentleness and moderation.
John Newton

Two Years Old

Two Years Old

TWO YEAR OLD

DATE: WEIGHT: LENGTH:

DEVELOPMENT:

Life with a toddler is a consuming experience. Trying to keep up with his new accomplishments is often the biggest challenge a new parent has yet had to face. Most two year olds are able to run (often away from you!), climb (to the top cupboards where you thought things were safe from him), throw a ball (or any breakable object), and use a crayon to scribble (especially on a wall). At one moment he may be loving and affectionate; at another he is demanding and shows his anger if he doesn’t get his way.

Tantrums are common and may be embarassing. Getting angry at your child will usually just reinforce it and encourage more tantrums. Since the main purpose behind the tantrum is getting attention, the best approach is to put him in a safe place where he can express his frustration and you can ignore him.

Your child needs to learn limits and boundries. A patient yet consistent approach is actually a source of security for him and will help steer this rapidly changing child in the right direction. Reserve the swat on the bottom when safety is an issue, such as finding him reaching for a hot pan on the stove. By rewarding appropriate behavior and showing him that inappropriate behavior does not gain attention, the parent can influence the child more naturally and with less tension.

You may find these suggestions helpful in getting along with your two year old:

  1. Don’t expect that daily routines will go smoothly. Cooperation does not come naturally at this age.
  2. Do not introduce any sudden changes in his routine without warning. Having regular times for mealtimes, naps, reading, bathing, and bedtime will help reinforce his feelings of security.
  3. Avoid any questions that can be answered by “No”. “It’s time for your bath” works better than “Do you want to take a bath now?”.
  4. Similarly, don’t give choices when it really matters.
  5. Do not expect a two year old to wait for things or to take turns easily. Sharing is also difficult.
  6. Try to see your child’s demands, negativism, and rigidity not as badness, but as immaturity.
  7. Do not take away your childs security blanket or favorite toy. Don’t be upset by thumbsucking.
  8. Don’t get your feelings hurt if you try to help your child but he wants somebody else.

Learning is rapid at this age. Most two year olds understand most of what is said to them, have a large vocabulary, and are starting to put words together into sentences. Reading to the child should be a regular part of the day.

Toilet training may be attempted now if he seems ready. This is one area where the child can and should succesfully control his own actions for himself. Therefore, try to make going to the toilet a privilege for “big boys” and respond positively when he succeeds. Force or punishment seldom work and often make things worse by causing constipation. All children eventually learn to use the toilet so don’t let early training become a status symbol.

SAFETY:

In the U.S., accidents are the leading cause of death and disability among toddlers. They are very energetic about learning and exploration, but have very little understanding of danger.

  1. Be firm about preventing her from running into the street. Hold her hand when walking across the street and in parking lots.
  2. Never allow your child to ride in a car unless she is securely restrained in a child safety seat.
  3. Even if she has had swimming lessons, she should always be under adult supervision when near pools, spas, or other bodies of water.
  4. Unfortunately, burns are very common at this age. Be especially aware of the dangers of matches, coffee and other hot liquids, stoves and ovens, fireplaces and heaters, curling irons, and cigarettes. Keep the temperature of your hot water heater no higher than 120 degrees to prevent scalds.
  5. Large sturdy toys without sharp edges or small, removable parts are safest.
  6. Lock up medicines, household cleaners, garden chemicals, and other poisons and have a bottle of syrup of Ipecac handy.

IMMUNIZATIONS:

By now, your child should have received her fourth DPT, third polio, measles, mumps, German measles, and HIB shots. She will need no futher immunizations until she starts kindergarten.

READING:

  1. Your Two Year Old: Ames and Ilg
  2. How To Discipline With Love: Dodson
  3. Toilet Learning: Mack
  4. Children: The Challenge: Dreikurs
  5. Parent Effectiveness Training: Gordon

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