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God: "I looked for someone to take a stand for me, and stand in the gap" (Ezekiel 22:30)

One does not have to remove all consequences for sin (i.e., to pardon) in order to forgive. It may be just and necessary for an offender to suffer consequences for wrong, but the motive of the one imposing or requiring the consequences cannot be malicious. We are not permitted to desire the ultimate harm of the offender. The gospel always provides hope, always seeks restoration. Even when the criminal is sentenced, and we properly rejoice to see justice done, the Christian also desires to see the offender recognize the sin, repent, and know spiritual restoration. Forgiveness does not require pardon from consequences; it requires an absence of malice (i.e., no desire for the person’s spiritual harm) even in the application of those consequences. We may well desire justice, but desires for personal revenge or spiritual damage are not our right as Christians.
Bryan Chapell

This commitment to total obedience does not mean a mere negative avoidance of evil practices. It also means positively obeying God’s commands. We cannot say that someone is a true Christian just because he is not a thief, liar, blasphemer, drunkard, sexually immoral, arrogant, cruel or fierce. He also has to be positively God-fearing, humble, respectful, gentle, peaceful, forgiving, merciful and loving. Without these positive qualities, he is not obeying the laws of Christ.
Jonathan Edwards

Sexual Abuse Of Children 2

This entry is part 2 of 3 in the series Sexual Abuse Of Children

Sexual Abuse Of Children 2

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Sexual Abuse of Children, Part Two
by Dr. George Sharpe (June, 1985)
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SEXUAL ABUSE OF CHILDREN

PART II: THE OVERT SEXUAL PHASE

Once offenders in a child abuse/incest situation feel that they have gained the child’s compliance, they will contrive a situation or circumstance in which to display their feelings. The emotions and drives of the offender may be satisfied in several ways. It may be some time or never before they attempt sexual intercourse as we might recognize it.

Sexual activity can be manifest in different forms: Mutual masturbation; Oral-genital sex; Vaginal/rectal penetration; or “Dry” sex where genitalia are rubbed against the child The offender is more likely to ejaculate on but not inside the child. Thus, children may present to hospitals with long histories of someone who has had “intercourse” with them but physical evidence is lacking.

Lack of physical evidence may be consistent with the child’s information as children are often confused as to the nature of sexual intercourse.

This is particularly so if the offender has been using the child to rub their genitalia. When confronted with apparent discrepancies between history and physical evidence, dolls with appropriate genitalia can be used by children to help tell the correct story. Children vary considerably in what they may define as sexual activity. They may well say to others that the act of kissing represents sex.

To the offender, remaining hidden from the knowledge of others is very important. Disclosure and loss of secrecy is what they most fear. It is often difficult to understand why children will continue with an offender for years at a time.

We must remember that we always emphasize obedience in children toward adults. The silence of the child may often be thought to represent complicity. This is rarely the case. In the enticement phase, fear and threats may have been used, now supplemented by embarrassment. Such children may appear vulnerable to others within the incestuous family unit. Cases exist where a grandfather abused the child and the mother as well. Other cases recount multiple abuse wherein father, uncle and brother enter the incestuous circle. The child’s silence is considered as compliance, that they want to be seduced. Such a child is setup for frequent molestation.

Many will question, surely the mother of the child must have known what was going on in the family ? The answer is usually affirmative in approximately 3/4 of the situations. But often the mother is a victim as well. Molested as a child, she may have low esteem, feelings of worthlessness and helplessness. To placate the offending adult, she may have recruited the child or restrained her during the molestation process.

NEXT: Part three… Disclosure and Cover-Up

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