We stand at the crossroads between fear of others and fear of God. The road leading to the fear of man may be expressed in terms of favoritism, wanting others to think well of you, fearing exposure by them, or being overwhelmed by their perceived physical power. When these fears are not combated with the fear of the Lord, the consequences can be devastating. But when God is given his rightful place in our lives, old bonds can be shattered.
Edward Welch

ANNE PAULK: former lesbian

ANNE PAULK: former lesbian

FORMER LESBIAN

Anne Paulk

 

“As a lesbian, I found hurt people just wantingsomeone to love. As a Christian, I found loving people just wantingto heal my hurt.”

I wasn’t able to say a thing after a teenage boy approached mesexually. Of course, at four years old you’re afraid of getting introuble…so you go silent. But inside, the pain of that moment beganto grow louder. I became a tomboy. I didn’t feel pretty or evenlovable. I craved special attention from my dad to make everythingall right, but I couldn’t tell him why. I began to feel beingfeminine meant being weak and vulnerable. I didn’t know what to dowith men…they just kept hurting me, so I rejected them. Once incollege, I pursued my growing attraction for other women. But as alesbian, I found most women were paired out of emotional dependencyrather than true love. That’s why I asked God to fill the void in myheart. He led me to warm, loving people who helped me see theunderlying needs that drove me into a lesbian identity. If you’restill looking for real love…and need to talk with somebody whounderstands, start by asking God.