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Mud Bath Wednesday

Posted by: bigguyhereagain <bigguyhereagain@...>

Please keep the students, faculty and families of the Virginia Tech in your prayers  during this very difficult time.
 
 
"Mud Bath"
 
    
 
A man goes into his doctors office for an annual
physical.  After a while, the doctor comes out and
says, "I'm sorry Bill, but we have discovered you
have a condition which only allows you another 6
weeks to live."
 
"But Doctor," Bill replied, "I feel great.  I
haven't felt better in years.  This just can't be
true.  Isn't there anything I can do?"
 
After a moment the doctor said, "Well, you might
start going down the street to that new health spa
and take a mud bath every day."
 
Excitedly Bill asked, "And that will cure me?"
 
"No," Replied the doctor, "but it will get you
used to the dirt."

 

"Hunting"
 
 
Three friends, a lawyer, doctor, & preacher, went hunting.
The 3 shot a big buck simultaneously. Upon reaching it
they found out that it had only one bullet hole. A debate
followed concerning whose buck it was.
 
Five minutes later a game officer came by and asked
what the problem was. The doctor told him their reason
for the debate.
 
The officer told them he could tell who shot the buck, "The
pastor shot it."
 
They all wondered how he knew that so quickly.
 
The officer said, "Easy. The bullet went in one ear and
out the other."
 
 
"Golf Date"

 
Stevie Wonder and Tiger Woods had met in the country club bar and were
having a libation before dinner..

Tiger turns to Stevie and asked, "How's the singing career going?"
Stevie replies, "Not too bad...

How's the golf?"
Woods replied, "Not too bad, I've had some problems with my swing, but I
think I've got that right now".

Stevie remarks, "I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to
stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I
play, it seems to be all right."

Tiger says a bit incredulously, "You play golf?"
Stevie says, "Yes, I've been playing for! years" . -
Tiger says, "But, you're blind. How can you play golf if you can't see?"

Stevie Wonder replies, "I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the
fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the
ball towards him. Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy
moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball
towards his voice."

"But, how do you putt?" asks Tiger.

"Well", says Stevie, "I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole
and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball
towards his voice."

Tiger asks, "What's your handicap?"

Stevie says, "Well, I'm a scratch golfer."

Woods is amazed and says to Stevie, "We've got to play a round
sometime."

Wonder replies, "Well, people don't take me seriously, so I only play
for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole".

Woods thinks about it and says, ! "OK, I'm game for that, - when would
you like to play?"

Stevie replies, "Pick a night".

 
 
Have a Blessed Day
Dave and Barbara
 
    
 
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