The Origins Of Homosexuality 3

origens of homosexuality

• Part 3

We have discussed what we believe to be the tap root of homosexuality, the lack of unconditional love. This deprivation, along with fear, envy, and isolation make up what we call the PREDISPOSITIONING PACKAGE which leads to homosexuality if it is left unchecked. Now we will look at what can be done to derail this progressing syndrome.

While we try to isolate the root causes (for the sake of convenience), it must be realized that they are inter-related, each reinforcing the other. Together, they form a vicious cycle which only a traumatic breakthrough can overcome.

The Development Of Fear

Though it may be reasoned that we are born without fear, a child is quick to learn fear when something unpleasant takes place and he does not want this to happen again. To a small child, fear is very simplistic and includes fears of being abandoned, unwanted, or left to go hungry. The child knows he is unable to meet his own needs and is dependent on older people to provide for those needs. It is sad to say that today, more than ever (or so it seems), children have their physical needs met while their emotional needs are neglected through parental absence, ignorance ,or plain fatigue on the part of the parents.

Coupled with these fears is the fear of being unprotected. Scripture tells us that the peace of God stands guard over our hearts and minds (Philippians 4:7). Just as God stands guard over us, the small child needs an earthly father who will stand guard over him, protecting him not only physically, but also in his emotional development as well. Parents seem to discount just how vulnerable a small child is. Witness a child lost in a large store and see the panic that takes over when he thinks he is left unprotected. This is only the visible panic; the emotional panic is unseen.

A Fathers Part.

God has seen fit to hold the husband responsible for his household. Many times, this is a heavy and confusing role for the father. The father may be totally unaware that his expectations for his child are actually driving a wedge between them that will destroy their relationship. The father who only extends love when the child is showing approved behaviour (smiling, paying attention, not crying) is non-verbally saying, “I do not love you when you cry, spill things, or act improperly.” If the father’s expectations are too high and cannot be met, the child feels that he fails in all his transactions with his father. He then fears that, because of his father’s displeasure with him, he cannot count on his father’s protection.

Fear seems to be something that is ever-expanding. Fear seems to breed increased fear. As the child’s mind develops (with the influence of today’s television and movies), he will begin to fear the unknown. His specific fears have branched out into non-specific fears, developing a sense of apprehension, a kind of all-encompassing, free-floating fear.

Isolation.

The child’s initial reaction will be to run to others for the approval and reassurance he needs. If he is fortunate enough to find a surrogate father who supplies his needs, the predispositioning package will lose its effectiveness and be stopped. The child that cannot find another person to fulfil his needs will provide for those needs in his own way. He will build a fantasy world that is impenetrable to those around him. He will enter a world of self-isolation.

Development Of Envy.

As the child grows up feeling unaffirmed, inadequate, and unloved, he will look about him and come to admire those who are secure and confident in their abilities. He will constantly be comparing himself with others. As he sees others accomplishing their goals and succeeding in life, he will begin to envy them. At first, he will wish to be like them. He may make attempts at copying their behaviour, language, and style of clothing, but none of this will accomplish his ends. It will never bring a feeling of security. As he retreats deeper into fantasy, he will want to control them.

He will see himself as King and in a position of controlling their lives and forcing them to do his bidding. As time passes, he will want to BE them. Erotic desire will arise out of his envy. He will have sexual fantasies where he is linked to them. In these fantasies, he is indispensable to them. They give him the recognition and sense of belonging that he longs for. The time may soon come when he acts out his fantasies within the confines of the gay lifestyle.